Overweight Children

DistantJ

I have a 12 year old son who is very overweight. While he has what I would think is a normal sweet tooth for a kid, he plays sports and is probably the most active of all my children. So when he kept gaining at an alarming rate, I took him to the doctor and found out that he has a thyroid problem.

Now, however, he has a LOT of excess weight. It's bad. I can't even buy husky sized clothing for him because it's too tight. I was hoping that if I kept only healthy foods in the house (for the most part) and if he was diligent about his thyroid meds and if he kept playing outside, he would lose weight, or at least grow taller and quit gaining (short stature is typical of hypothyroid, and he is very short).

In the 4+ months he has been on meds, he has grown 1/2 inch at the most and has gained another 8 lbs! I am at a loss. I hesitate to put him on a "diet," but it's looking like that will be my only option. He enters junior high this fall and I worry about bullying a lot because of his size. Anyone have a child that they have helped lose weight? What did you do?

rockmama72

Keep doing what you're doing. Offer healthy food and encourage activity. My son was pudgy until puberty hit. Then he shot up a foot and is over 6 feet tall and is very slim, almost skinny!

tegalicious

Have you had this discussion with your doctor? I was under the impression that the goal with overweight children was to not make them lose weight but to maintain their weight and let their height growth spurts even them out. But with a thyroid condition he may need additional things that only a doctor is really qualified to implement.

tegalicious

Keep doing what you're doing. Offer healthy food and encourage activity. My son was pudgy until puberty hit. Then he shot up a foot and is over 6 feet tall and is very slim, almost skinny!

This too! He hasn't hit puberty yet so he probably has a lot of height to gain.

RhonndaJ

You may have to put him on a diet, but given his age and his thyroid condition speak to his doctor about how to go about this.

It's not fun to be on a diet at that age, it may have been years ago but I'm pretty certain kids today would feel the same as I did back when. So consider his emotional state as well.

Greytfish

Keep doing what you're doing.

Also, make sure when they check his function that they do a full thyroid panel as a T4 test won't tell you if he has an uptake or conversion problem. Also, make sure his meds are the same brand or generic each time. Different ones affect people differently.

If supplementation is working and he isn't overeating, he should start to lean out. If he doesn't, he's probably simply eating too much.

Commander_Keen

A diet is a way of life.
so yes. Get rid of the junk food.. any junk food that he gets will be from his friends.
Enroll him in activities.
Use small plates..
Cook healthy for everybody, let everybody know due to a healthier MOM and DAds

ashcky

Have his thyroid levels been consistent? Or is it still not under control?

serindipte

I second (or third) those who are recommending you speak with his doctor on how to go about helping him with weight loss. I just wanted to suggest that, if it does come down to 'Putting him on a diet'.. I would not approach it in that manner. I would gear it towards "learning to eat more healthy" and "relearning our body's cues on when we are actually hungry". Yes, weight loss is one goal but I think the more long term goal would be to help him learn early what many of us are just now learning in adulthood.. how to have a healthy relationship with food.

GeorgieLove708

Speak to his doctor. Otherwise keep offering healthy foods and encouraging activity. And make sure everyone in the family is eating healthy and being active. It's hard on kids to be the only ones expected to eat right.
My doctor ordered me on a diet as a kid and it only made things so much worse. It just led to me sneaking food and the start of binge-eating disorder.

wheird

At this point, weighing him only frustrates the both of you. He is entering puberty and will start putting on weight due to increased height and skeletal muscle. So do both of you a favor and lose the scale.

Encourage him to be active, which team sports can help. And try to teach him healthy eating habits at home.

However, puberty makes boys into landfills, so dont underfeed him.

ljcdills

My daughter is also struggling with her weight. I do not want to put her on a diet either, but I also don't want to wait until it is out of control. At 8 she weighs 5 pounds more than her brother who is 2 years older and several inches taller than her. I have been at a loss for how to handle this. I don't want to cause her to have self esteem issues or create an eating disorder by constantly watching what she eats. I will say that her weight issue isn't due to a medical problem, she just loves to eat and loves sweets and junk.

Shriffee

I'd go back to the doctor with your concerns. It might require a little more investigation. They also might want to get a dietician involved, not to necessarily put him on a "diet" but to make sure he's getting enough of what he needs to grow. My heart goes out to you. I know how it is to worry about your little boy. :flowerforyou:

will2lose72

Following thread...I too have an overweight 11 yo son will be in middle school next year. He has a hard time in PE now and I think MS PE will be way worse on him. We went to a healthy living seminar sponsored by the local children's hospital and it has not really helped....that is MY fault. I am here trying to get myself straight and I know he sees this. We've talked a little about getting more active together and I'm working on that too.

I'd think your son could be affected by the meds he's on as well...maybe they need to be adjusted? Anyway, letting you know you are not alone and following for any ideas as well!

gkauf744

My son is overweight, but I waited until he complained about it. Then we both went to his doctor together, and are making healthy changes. Now we are both losing weight together. It's like a family thing lol. Now instead of being overweight together, we are eating less and exercising more together. I think its great. We're kind of bonding over it. I'm counting calories, but he's not. For him, I just swapped out sweets for fruit, reduced portion sizes, loaded his plate with veggies. We have a follow up with his doctor in three months, so we'll see. *Fingers crossed*

mgorham13

I was a "husky" kid by junior high I shot up to 5'11" 250 I was tall my mom didn't want to hurt my feelings by going on a diet. By the time I graduated high school I was 6'2" 340....I guess you could say she nearly loved me to death. The thyroid is a bit different though I would ask the doctor what maintenance for him would be in terms of calories or input his info on here to find out then as discreetly as you can track his calories.

My kids while all in the average weight range would eat until there was nothing left in the house if we let them. I have 4 boys 1 of them is potentially getting on the husky side he gets fresh fruit for his school snack.

DebbieLyn63

If he is continuing to gain weight even after being on the meds, than he is still eating more calories than he is burning.
I know the general consensus today is that parents are horrible for putting their kids on diets, but lets face it, he will have weight issues his entire life,so learning about nutrition and calories now will save him a lifetime of bullying, depression, and obesity health issues.

A 'diet' is simply the food we eat every day. It is our choices for what we put in our mouths. There is nothing wrong with having a diet.

Talk to a nutritionists if you need to, to educate yourself about how many calories we burn per day, and macro percentages, etc.
Then share this info with your son. Compare the calories and volumes of different foods so that he can learn to make better choices in the foods he eats, or at least the amount of food. Use a scale and measuring cups to show him exactly what a 'serving' of food is.

When he learns that proteins and healthy fats, plus higher fiber foods will keep him satisfied longer than simple processed carbs and sugars, then he can choose foods that can help him stay within his calorie goals for the day/week.

If HE is given the information and has the power to make choices for his own body, it will be much easier on him than being strictly told to not eat this or that.

Middle school can be an extremely cruel time in a child's life, and the bullying encountered there can cause way more long lasting damage than a mother who teaches him how to take control of his health.

Good for you for loving your son enough to make sure he is healthy, even when it is an uncomfortable situation.

WonderCort

I have a son with this issue. I do not know how many children you have or what their age gaps are, but part of what makes this a tough issue in our home is this son is also my most active energetic kid, he eats what the other kids are, and the others are all in a good weight range. Been giving him what I keep thinking are reasonable portions for a kid his age and he just keeps gaining.

Iwishyouwell

Best you can do is make sure the entire family gets healthier. Do not bring in all kinds of junk, sweets, and crap that you know your child will have trouble resisting. The fat kid being singled out in a family while everyone eats with abandon can be detrimental. But so can being an obese kid.

See a dietician. Get the entire family on a healthier road. Best you can do is instill better eating values on the whole, while encouraging activity, and hoping he gets it enough that he can withstand outside of the home.

Pack lunches if you fear he's eating the garbage school lunches and monitor how much money he has, because most schools have vending machines.

Talk to your child about how they're feeling about their self image. Please do your best to give them a safe place to be open and honest.

Parents make the common mistake of thinking they know what their kids are eating. "Oh Jimmy/Sue eats the same as we do". No. Many kids are secret eaters. Even the ones who aren't can be over consuming and you have no clue. Trips to the convenience store with friends and siblings to get cheap snacks, hanging out over friends houses while everyone is eating, eating high calorie school snacks, the aforementioned vending machines, all of these things add up. Your child could be consuming hundreds, even thousands, of calories beyond what you think you know.

My mother was fat, my father was fat, all three of their kids together were fat. We ate like "normal" Americans back in the 80s and 90s, and it was detrimental. She saw a nutritionist and tried to turn things around, but we were still fat. Being fat as children was detrimental on our psyches, and made losing and maintaining weight as adults SO much harder. Do everything in your power to turn this around, because trust me, it'll have long reaching consequences for this child long past their childhood and teen years.

But LOVE your child. Make sure they take the lead in their own change. They have to be at a point where they want to lose. Trying to force them, or do it for them, isn't going to work. But trust me, most fat kids KNOW they're fat, they become aware at some point, and do not want to be that way.

echoslug

I used to nanny for a family who had a similar problem. Two kids, one boy one girl, who were both very active. However the girl, 9 years old, was almost 26 pounds over weight despite 'healthy eating', being on a swim team and doing active outdoor activities for at least an hour a day. I mean this girl loved to bike - she biked to school with her mom everyday and we'd bike for hours at a time on the weekend.

When I started working for them I was given strict instructions fro her doctor to make sure she got back down to a healthy weight. Three weeks in I had to talk to the parents about the "healthy diet" they had both kids on.

For example - they'd swapped out chips for yogurt as a healthy snack but the yogurt they were buying had 26 grams of sugar per container. She was allowed to eat 2-3 containers a day which meant she was getting on average 78 grams of sugar a day from her "healthy snack".

Likewise they'd swapped soda for juice - great in moderation but she was drinking 4 tall glasses a day, usually of apple or grape juice. Lots of sugar there.

And then the peanut butter. Peanut butter is great in all IF you follow the serving size (2 tbsp). She was often eating 1/3-1/2 a cup of peanut butter a day.

Anyways getting portion sizes under control and eliminating all sort of unnecessary sugar and fat in favor of veggies and lean proteins and she'd dropped 15 lbs in the three months I was working for the family. And god was that first month hard - these kids fought me tooth and nail when I made them start eating veggies.


Now I'm not saying your situation is the same but hopefully this gives you some ideas as to where you might start looking for hidden culprits in your sons diet. The great things about kids is if you get them on the right track diet wise they tend to drop weight pretty quickly because they are so young an active.

violet791

Just my thoughts ...
I was an overweight child (no thyroid problems). My mom tried everything - from diets, to getting only healthy foods in the house, to doing Weight Watchers with me, to joining a gym together, to making me exercise, to regular weigh-ins.

Nothing worked. Mainly because it felt forced on me, I didn't want it for myself, my mom wanted it for me. And it really strained our relationship as I felt like I would only be loved if I lost weight. I was also an expert at stealing, sneaking, and hiding food.

I don't know what advice to offer, but glad to see all these comments about making it a family change vs. singling out one child.

bumblebreezy91

Keep doing what you're doing. Offer healthy food and encourage activity. My son was pudgy until puberty hit. Then he shot up a foot and is over 6 feet tall and is very slim, almost skinny!

This happened with my brother! He was an overweight kid shorter than me and then one summer he shot up and now he's skin and bones.

DistantJ

Have his thyroid levels been consistent? Or is it still not under control?

His thyroid finally is finally at a normal level, according to this doc.

DistantJ

I appreciate everyone's thoughts, advice and personal experiences. Thank you! I did ask his doctor about it,and all he did was tell me what my son should be consuming as far as calories go in a day. Sigh. I could have found that on the internet! He is 4' 8.5" and is 140, so he is severely overweight, not just "husky" and I am really worried.

He's completely receptive and wants to get to a normal weight, but he does lack self-control. He has great friends and doesn't feel bad about himself, so that really really helps. I need to sit down with him and discuss what is healthy and what isn't, and what I can keep around that he likes and that won't contribute to the problem.

Again, thanks! If anyone has more ideas, feel free to share.

LINIA

More bad news---are parents able to fight against 5 billion dollars spent per year on advertising aimed directly at youngsters?

http://news.yahoo.com/selling-candy-babies-disturbing-between-junk-food-brands-185011170.html

DebbieLyn63

More bad news---are parents able to fight against 5 billion dollars spent per year on advertising aimed directly at youngsters?

http://news.yahoo.com/selling-candy-babies-disturbing-between-junk-food-brands-185011170.html

We as parents, have the responsibility of making decisions for our kids until they are old enough to make them for themselves. Just because they are bombarded with advertising for certain things, doesn't mean we can't teach them how to make good decisions for themselves and their health.
There are numerous health-conscious families that are raising normal weight children. Their children see the same ads as the overweight families do. It comes down to what is 'normal' in their household.

I mean, lately it seems that all the ads are for Viagra and other ED meds, yet my 14 yo has yet to ask for them! :laugh:

pipertargaryen

My brother is 13 now, and he was really overweight at age 11, and then suddenly grew to be like 6'1" (and he still has a little boy voice, it's so weird). He's still heavier, but he cuts an imposing figure, not a fat one, if that makes sense.

pandabear_

Boys are usually short at 12, when they get to 16 they are suddenly taller. This is normal, all the girls in my class were taller than the boys at age 12. Then by the end of high school they were taller than us. We were actually taught this in a science class because it was becoming a problem for the boy's "self esteem". :huh:

sunshine4040

My friends daughter is grossly overweight. Not my words, but her doctors. When she was 8 she was wearing a petite womans 2x clothes because normal kid clothes didn't fit her. Now she is 12 and is wearing a 2x still. She has diabetes, and the Doctor said that she is developing heart problems and high cholesterol because of this. Her mommy is also over weight, and is trying to cook healthier, walking, and got rid of the junk food. Her main problem is the child will not eat veggies. She is an extremely picky eater and is throwing a fit over the healthier food being brought in. So, I know they are really struggling. I know my post does not help much, but know you are not alone. I have seen my friend in tears trying to help her daughter.

Ulwaz

speak to a doctor about a recommended diet plan, but also most kids are overweight and then lose it through puberty its pretty normal

Francl27

I'd definitely go see a nutritionist about that one, they might be able to help him with his self control.

But yeah... make it a family thing. Don't buy junk., so self control is less of an issue, at least at home. No more sugary drinks at all either... just water. Good luck!