Online dating for 500... anyone?

I_see_skinny_Me15
I_see_skinny_Me15 Posts: 22 Member
in Chit-Chat
Sorry if this is a dead horse topic, but I am new to the arena and was curious as to what other people think of the online dating sites. I have tried the free ones, Plenty of Fish, and MeetMe and they have been a disaster. So, now I am contemplating the paid sites instead... Any experiences to share, or secret code to decipher for me?

Replies

  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    I think they're all basically the same. Paid, or free, seems like the same people are on all of them.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    Hang out here for free.
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    Sorry if this is a dead horse topic, but I am new to the arena and was curious as to what other people think of the online dating sites. I have tried the free ones, Plenty of Fish, and MeetMe and they have been a disaster. So, now I am contemplating the paid sites instead... Any experiences to share, or secret code to decipher for me?

    Have you tried Meetup.com? It isn't a dating site, more of a get together site. Brings people together for dancing, hiking, skiing, cards, games, kayaking.......you name it there is someone setting one up.

    Just don't go to the 40 and over group! Use the mixed crowd. I made the mistake of picking a 50s plus group and I swear I was younger by 10 yrs than any man there.

    It was fun though, a Beatles cover band. I found out later there were 3 other groups at that function from 20-60 and really everyone should have mingled.

    {{{{[hugs}}}}}}}} It is like looking for a job, why can't we ask for a resume and references?? :laugh:
  • LunaGreen
    LunaGreen Posts: 118 Member
    I met my fiance on eHarmony. I tried plenty of fish with awful results, when I did eHarm I ended up going on some of the best dates of my life and meeting my very best friend in the whole wide world!! We have lots of couple friends that also got matched up on the same site and a few from Match. I would highly recommend these sites as I feel most of the skeezy types aren't going to gravitate towards a paid site. While I was online dating though I usually met during the day or early evening in a well populated are, always meet somewhere as opposed to having them pick you up at your home or work, and always tell a friend exactly where you will be and when, and keep that friend in the loop if your plans take you elsewhere.
    I will also say to take your time with the initial profile set-up especially if you choose eHarmony. You find out a lot about yourself too and I really feel that part of me being "lucky in love" at that time was due to just being honest with myself about who I am, what I want, what I don't want, and what I have to give. I would suggest anyone dating (whether it be online or not) write things down, just to get them into the Universe and open yourself up to finding Love.
    Best Wishes! GL
  • sarahc142
    sarahc142 Posts: 156
    Tried Craigslist and mostly it was guys cheating on their girlfriends looking for a quick hookup.
    But I met my boyfriend on Meetme!
    You could also try different forums for specific things like a band, tv show, weight loss (like this site) etc
  • ModernNerd
    ModernNerd Posts: 336 Member
    Hang out here for free.

    So uhmm *stares at feet* wanna go out? :flowerforyou:
  • howcanthatbetakenalready
    howcanthatbetakenalready Posts: 107 Member
    Ya...Waste of time mostly IMO.

    The problem is often schedules don't allow putting yourself out there. Me included. I may get 1 maybe 2 nights per month free. Kind of hard to meet people like that.

    But I have considered the Meetup thing. It's a way to force yourself to meet new people and once you do you just might hit it off with someone. That's my theory anyhow.
  • Leonidas_meets_Spartacus
    Leonidas_meets_Spartacus Posts: 6,198 Member
    Not sure I would do something like this but lot of intel on how online dating sites work.
    http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2014/01/how-to-hack-okcupid/all/
  • jayjay12345654321
    jayjay12345654321 Posts: 653 Member
    I went out with 4 or 5 people from Match.com, not one of them had an honest profile. One guy even snorted cocaine in front of me and admitted to being raided by the DEA several times since his FELONY arrest for dealing.

    Meet Up is a cool site. It's for finding groups of people with common interests and hanging out together. No pressure to date, so you get to meet people in a pseudo-natural environment. Stay away from the "singles" groups. The stench of desperation in the room was unbearable.
  • HDHogger
    HDHogger Posts: 764
    it's too impersonal for me for one and most people aren't honest and have unrealistic expectations. I think it's sexier to meet someone in person and not someone advertising for a date.
  • dontwishforit_workforit
    dontwishforit_workforit Posts: 112 Member
    I'm sure I'm likely in the minority as a lesbian, but I met my wife on-line. However, the site was more a "hey we're all gay!" attitude and forum-heavy with a chat room as opposed to a site strictly for matching up with someone. With that said, a LOT of people are paired up on that site due to the site (as in, they weren't coupled and then joined as some of them do). Also, my wife and I at the time only lived 90 minutes apart, and didn't meet face to face until after a year of talking. We've been together five years and married for the last two, so obviously on-line dating does work out for some people :)

    We had lunch in my city and then had a second date days later, but the first time I traveled to her place to stay overnight (a few monthes into dating, I think) I provided my mom (per her request) with a copy of her driver's license, her address, phone number, and place of employment. They weren't too worried since she's a reservist in the military and a cop, but better safe than sorry! :) Prior to my wife I met someone on-line who lived in Cali and after a year I flew out there, and provided the same stuff again to my mother. Just in case. There are some cra-cra people out there!
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    Call me old-fashioned, but I still think it's kind of creepy.

    I don't think it's impossible to find someone of quality, though. Just not my cup of tea.
  • missomgitsica
    missomgitsica Posts: 496 Member
    I don't have any personal experience with online dating, but I know two happily married couples who met through eHarmony. So if I were going to do it I'd go with eHarmony.
  • EricJonrosh
    EricJonrosh Posts: 823 Member
    Meh. Join meetup outdoors groups.
  • Ciniharts
    Ciniharts Posts: 60
    I would steer clear of POF, they really ought to rename it Plenty of Pond Scum. OK Cupid has a slightly higher caliber of person it seems. I did the E-harmony thing, but it really wasn't any better then the free sites to be honest. Also, the level of honesty on any of these sites is minimal, people tend to pretend to be people that they are not and are also always looking at the next shiny object. I think the suggestions of trying Meet-Up are probably your best bet. Good luck!
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    I don't really know anything about dating sites, but my uncle met his wife on Match.com a few years ago, and now I have the most adorable little 2 year old cousin!:heart:
  • I_see_skinny_Me15
    I_see_skinny_Me15 Posts: 22 Member
    Thanks everyone! I checked into meet up and have found some pretty interesting groups to check out. MFP peeps rock!
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    Thanks everyone! I checked into meet up and have found some pretty interesting groups to check out. MFP peeps rock!

    I have a few friends that met in those groups. This way it isn't an awkward 1:1, but groups where you meet more organically.

    I am psyched to go to the Salsa meet up nearby. Bring it on! :drinker:
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    Not sure I would do something like this but lot of intel on how online dating sites work.
    http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2014/01/how-to-hack-okcupid/all/

    When my 'perfect match' was my ex............well I closed the account down (I wont mention which ones, but 2 of them did that!!):laugh:
  • megaen29
    megaen29 Posts: 95 Member
    My boyfriend and I met on Plenty of Fish two and a half years ago and I've never been happier. One of my best friends met her fiance on there around the same time. There are a lot of weirdos but with proper screening and weeding out the crazies there are some good guys to be found!
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Met my hubby on plentyoffish.com!
  • darkrose20
    darkrose20 Posts: 1,139 Member
    I found my current SO on a social media web site for like minded people. NOT a dating site. The people on dating sites just didn't fit my need of a "like minded person." I went to a specialty site looking to make friends and now I have more than a friend.

    Maybe that's what you should do. If you like, say D&D, go hang out on forums dedicated to the game...or if you're an Epicurian, go find message boards dedicated to all things food. Start talking to locals and just hang out. Might work.

    d.

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