Sometimes I don't want to keep going....

ckemmis

These last few months have been a hot mess. I've gained a few pounds and have had no motivation. I feel like crap. But this picture reminds me to keep going, even when I don't want to. In the first picture, I was celebrating my 21st birthday. My grandma, who was simply amazing, passed away about seven months before hand, which had me eating my feelings. Days before this picture, my best friend was killed in a motorcycle accident. Around this time, I was close to my heaviest weight, which was 238 lbs.

The picture on the right, was almost a year ago at about 205 lbs. It took a long time for me to lose over 30 lbs, a little over a year (I think). At this point, I've pretty much stopped working out. I was hoping the weight would fall off. And guess what, it hasn't. Nearly a year later, and I'm 4 lbs heavier than what I was in the picture on the right. I don't really have any motivation, other than this picture and while I don't lack a support system, I don't have a great one either. But sometimes, I just have to look at these to pictures to remind myself that it is possible and to just keep going.

psych101

I'm sorry about your grandma and friend.


take lots and lots of pictures - take measurements.

Take each day, one day at a time. You will get there and you can do it

operator646

:flowerforyou: Hey, at least you are honest with yourself and confronting some difficult feelings. Until lately after seeing a therapist for my food issues, I didn't really understand how strong of a food addiction I had. But I now call it what it is but still am struggling to confront it and make the changes.
It sounds as if you really don't want to give up, you just have to find whatever it is that will motivate and support you along the way.

Claire00175

It may sound silly but I take a 'fat picture' (basically me from the front and side, not breathing in!!) same day every month so that even if I don't feel like I have done very well or I am loosing motivation, then I can see what I really have done and it makes me want to carry on. Also, never forget the reason you want to loose weight and change your lifestyle, and keep hold of that thought.. it helps me :happy:

You are doing well and being honest with yourself if a great step. I hope this helps and feel free to add me as a friend if you want a little more support on MFP.

mbk1970

I have access to a trainer, a supportive family, and my abilities and I STILL struggle every day! Every single day will give you something new. A friend once told me to keep a short memory. By that he meant do NOT dwell on what you did yesterday and move on.
Grieve appropriately and take your time, you have your youth.
One Day At A Time!

Cal28

You're on here posting so something is telling you that you still want it. It has to be for you.
I started so many times because I felt I should but when your back and decided that you can do this then you will! (with a little help from your MFP friends!)

xx

Roaringgael

I listen to some motivational weight-loss tapes from Jon Gabriel.
I know that finding the motivation is hard.
These 21 meditations talk about how we think and how we can let go of the weight.
I found them excellent and listen to them over and over.

You don't have to specifically buy his stuff but you might find it useful to read about how to get in the right mindset for weight loss and also what our minds truly believe about our body size.

Of course it does all boil down to just doing it, but sometimes getting to that point is harder for some of us, the weight can be a safety net protecting us from the world.

skinnyinnotime

I'm sorry for your loss of your grandma and friend.

You know it's worth it, you just need to start and keep going this time. You'll be glad you did, you will feel so proud of yourself and your results.

:flowerforyou: :drinker:

strunch

You can do it! I know you can.

svsl0928

You are young. The changes you make now will benefit you when you get older. I wish I had taken better care of myself when I was younger. Now I have high blood pressure. It is much better since I have lost weight. I was taking two pills. Now only one. As we get older our eating habits and lack or exercise are causes for several life threatening illnesses. I realize that when I wasn't taking care of my body I was slowly and surely on the road to poor health and death at an early age.

Jennifer10723

Someone said on here .. you have to find your give a damn. I now use that as my "kick" in the butt. Find your give a damn. something that pushes you forward. Maybe know that your grandma would want you to be as healthy and happy as you could possibly be! You look great!

grrupp

I think that you lost 30lbs. to begin with and kept most of it off is very inspiring. I started using mfp last Jan. and in six months lost 30lbs. and in the next six months gained 2/3 of it back.
I like you and several of my friends on mfp have also been struggling to find that motivation that once drove me to lose the weight and get back to there but maybe it's not about finding my way back but finding my way forward from where I am now and stop looking back at where I was.
Today is a new day with new hopes, promises and struggles. I think if we constantly wait for smooth sailing we will constantly be waiting, speaking for myself
It is Great and Admirable that you posted your struggle on here, please Know you are NOT alone, Lots of us are there with you but we can weather through this and will.
Can't remember who said it but "begin with the end in mind"....YOU CAN DO THIS!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!