Guys, does anyone care...

EvanKeel
EvanKeel Posts: 1,904 Member
..how you're losing weight? I'm speaking specifically to the men here.

I see all kinds of threads about frustrations from co-workers/friends/family who give lectures to the poster about how their proposed weight loss method is bound to fail. But most of these posts seem to come from women, which I thought was interesting.

I've had people question whether or not my goal weight is too low, but no one has ever directly criticized how I'm losing weight or thought to lecture me on nutrition. If it happened, I think I'd be shocked. Could this possibly be because of my gender? Do we as a society feel fine being annoyingly pedantic to women, but not to men?

Which brought up a host of possible secondary causes/questions.

-Assuming there is a disparity between this happening to men vs women, do women post more often about this because there are just more female MFP users, and their posts seem more prevalent? I would guess the male to female ratio of MFP users is greatly slanted in favor of the ladies.

-Is it the subject matter? Do men just get lectured on other, related topics. For example, how often do people (probably other men) lecture each other on the best way to build muscle?

My intuition kind of wants to say that men are granted a social affordance for eating whatever they like and go unscathed by people needing to interject their own opinions about it--at least where weight loss is concerned.

Replies

  • SGM_Adonis
    SGM_Adonis Posts: 1,565 Member
    Outside of MFP, no one has ever questioned the means I go about losing weight (fat). I do get a lot of, "You don't need to lose any more weight" comments, but that has to do more with my height and the fact that I hide my fat underneath my clothes.
  • SweetTrouble_
    SweetTrouble_ Posts: 933 Member
    Outside of MFP, no one has ever questioned the means I go about losing weight (fat). I do get a lot of, "You don't need to lose any more weight" comments, but that has to do more with my height and the fact that I hide my fat underneath my clothes.
    I don't think you should wear clothes.
  • urban_ninja
    urban_ninja Posts: 175 Member
    Yeah, I do get it from friends that are weight focused. They keep telling me what I need to do to burn that fat faster and I need to put more attention on lifting. But I have different fitness goals than them so I just nod and move on. I'm striving for agility, speed, and flexibility. I want to get back to my days of doing flips and jumping wheel kicks. I want to bust 720s on my snowboard again and smash serves like Andy Rodd1ck.

    If I look good as a result, bonus!

    EDIT: Weird, MFP censored "Rodd1ck"
  • ekz13
    ekz13 Posts: 725 Member
    not really for me either.. family inquired but friends no. I think for males this falls in line with the

    "Umm Ted, you're not wearing those shoes with that shirt are you? SAID NO GUY EVER" mentality .. we just aren't wired like that for the most part I think.

    I actually had one friend *hint* that i *might* be using steriods/pills to drop the weight, his statement "not saying YOU'RE doing this, but the ecomony is tough, you wouldn't want to lose your job over it, but i'm not saying you are"

    got a chuckle on that one.
  • Derp_Diggler
    Derp_Diggler Posts: 1,456 Member
    I think women are more apt to try the latest fad/ craze to try to lose weight. Men are more likely to just work out more and drink less.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
    Even as a female I honestly have not had too many comments in this realm.

    I'd never been a big yo-yo dieter in the past and I was in semi-denial for years about my weight issues, so I purposely tuned out all of the fad diets, shakes, hot new workouts, etc...and as a result I was rarely included in discussions of those things with my friends and coworkers.

    When I first started using MFP, I had just started working with some women who were huge fad dieters without much success. I had maybe 2 short conversations in which they lectured me about MFP and how it would NEVER help me lose weight...by then I'd already dropped my first 20 lb and was a believer so I tuned them out. They did make a few rude remarks to me about some of the foods I ate because they were all about the low carb and I occasionally mentioned French toast or something and they would gasp with shock. Annoying.

    My best friend's a big believer in eating gluten free and eliminating bread, rice, pasta, etc. My husband and I eat all of that stuff in moderation. At times she balks at some of our meals, and occasionally she'll get kinda preachy about how wonderful her GF diet had been for her (which I tune out) but she is never too pushy or rude.

    Mostly I encounter people who don't believe me that "all I'm doing" is counting calories. Yes I do tend to choose healthier foods than ever before and cut out a lot of sodium and some sugar compared to before. But they seem to think I am lying about MFP working for me and that I am secretly using a magical shake, superfoods, or prescribed pills. Serious.
  • tedrickp
    tedrickp Posts: 1,229 Member

    Assuming there is a disparity between this happening to men vs women, do women post more often about this because there are just more female MFP users, and their posts seem more prevalent? I would guess the male to female ratio of MFP users is greatly slanted in favor of the ladies.

    This is my guess - always gotta consider the baserate.

    That said, any time I am around guys who are into health and fitness there is a ton of talk about it. Including, arguing merits of certain exercises and health choices. But at the end of the night we go home and forget about it for the most part.
  • I think women are more apt to try the latest fad/ craze to try to lose weight. Men are more likely to just work out more and drink less.

    Really? In my experience, guys are quick to regurgitate the latest workout/diet/regimen they have read from a Men's Health or Muscle and Strength as soon as you say "Hey, so I worked out the other day and..."
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    I've seen quite a lot of what you speak of. Its possible some of it is because the female to male ratio here is lop sided pretty favorably.

    I don't have a problem losing weight or gaining weight for that matter. I've cycled myself for most of 30 years now. I have females on my FL that can do the same. One thing I have with them in common is we have been athletes in training for most our lives. I think the athletic background enable a more stable gain/loss even at a fast pace that is considered unhealthy for those that do not have that color feather in their hat.
  • More guys comment on weight loss and what I should be doing then women. With women... it's normally just a discussion.. "oh have you tried this? I heard this..." Men are normally the ones that say forget all that.. "you need to do this." Normally, they push more dumb diets on me than women do. I went camping this weekend and had a guy tell me how bad my whole grain tortillas were for me and how I needed to do a cleanse and how I could lose weight faster than the 2lbs a week I have been losing by eating more soups and juicing. I didn't tell him how much I disagreed... just nodded along like I didn't really know.

    Just my 2 cents... sorry... I know you said men... but I thought it was relevant.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    LOL

    I think women TALK about what they are doing more.
  • EvanKeel
    EvanKeel Posts: 1,904 Member
    More guys comment on weight loss and what I should be doing then women. With women... it's normally just a discussion.. "oh have you tried this? I heard this..." Men are normally the ones that say forget all that.. "you need to do this." Normally, they push more dumb diets on me than women do. I went camping this weekend and had a guy tell me how bad my whole grain tortillas were for me and how I needed to do a cleanse and how I could lose weight faster than the 2lbs a week I have been losing by eating more soups and juicing. I didn't tell him how much I disagreed... just nodded along like I didn't really know.

    Just my 2 cents... sorry... I know you said men... but I thought it was relevant.

    Fair enough. I'm just curious if he would have said the same thing to you if you were a man.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
    LOL

    I think women TALK about what they are doing more.

    Yes. To men, everything is a covert op.
  • Derp_Diggler
    Derp_Diggler Posts: 1,456 Member
    I think women are more apt to try the latest fad/ craze to try to lose weight. Men are more likely to just work out more and drink less.

    Really? In my experience, guys are quick to regurgitate the latest workout/diet/regimen they have read from a Men's Health or Muscle and Strength as soon as you say "Hey, so I worked out the other day and..."

    Maybe as far as working out goes but not regarding weight loss per se, which is what the OP asked about. At least from my experience.
  • More guys comment on weight loss and what I should be doing then women. With women... it's normally just a discussion.. "oh have you tried this? I heard this..." Men are normally the ones that say forget all that.. "you need to do this." Normally, they push more dumb diets on me than women do. I went camping this weekend and had a guy tell me how bad my whole grain tortillas were for me and how I needed to do a cleanse and how I could lose weight faster than the 2lbs a week I have been losing by eating more soups and juicing. I didn't tell him how much I disagreed... just nodded along like I didn't really know.

    Just my 2 cents... sorry... I know you said men... but I thought it was relevant.

    Fair enough. I'm just curious if he would have said the same thing to you if you were a man.

    That's a good question.

    I wonder if sometimes women don't leave ourselves open for stuff like that, though. I don't hear men talking about diet with other men. Maybe if men want to diet they just do it and don't talk about it. Women like to talk about everything. Our day, our diet, our problems... sometimes, it's just how we process things and workout our thoughts. Maybe in voicing these things to men, we leave ourselves open for what men see as "solutions" to the problem. Everyone is different.... but typically this is the pattern I see in women and men.
  • monkeywizard
    monkeywizard Posts: 222 Member
    Being a big guy, If I noticed a male friend has lost a good amount of weight, I've got no problem asking what they were doing to lose it.

    Now since starting I've lost about 25 lbs, and it isn't amazingly noticeable so no one has really asked me yet. The only conversation I've had about my weight loss is with my wife who is also working on it and a friend of mine that is a professional nutritionist and she was making sure that my habits were healthy, and sustainable (which they were... YAY!).
  • mister_universe
    mister_universe Posts: 6,664 Member
    LOL

    I think women TALK about what they are doing more.

    ^this, pretty much.