How to help an overeater

Psysix

Someone close to me eats about three times the normal amount I see an average person eat and is steadily gaining more weight. They are already about 120 pounds overweight. I know people get very sensitive about talking about food portions so I'm not sure how to approach this. I have already told him he should try cutting down his portions because he said he wanted to lose weight with me, but has since gained more. When I tell him healthier options, he adds them to his existing meals rather than substituting like I suggested. I don't want to nag, but I want to help. Advice?

moontyrant

In my experience you can't help someone who's unwilling to help himself. The best you can do until that day is lead by example and keep healthy options in the environment.

Psysix

In my experience you can't help someone who's unwilling to help himself. The best you can do until that day is lead by example and keep healthy options in the environment.

Thank you.

hortensehildegarde

If he is really open to wanting help, instead of discussing what he eats in particular you could maybe talk about how many calories go into adding a pound, and how many calories people typically use per day, and calorie counts in different types of food. Perhaps if he can start becoming aware of the math it might help him. I know a lot of people who say things like "I never realized how many calories I was eating!"

I agree with the leading by example, but to the extent you can gently educate him along the way it might be worth a shot. So if, for example, you are eating chicken together and you take off the skin or you make some other kind of food choice if he happens to ask about you can describe the calorie count in what you are skipping and why it is not worth eating it to you due to the number of calories, or something like that.

Vicxie86

You can't remotely help make a change unless the person is ready. My mum had been warning me since i was 15 about all the chocolate,crisps and fizzy drinks i had been consuming but i never bothered to listen because i felt she wanted me to look slim and i preferred being curvy and besides, my stomach still looked flat.

Then i took the meaning of curvy too far without knowing i had, even now, i still think i looked ok but ok wasn't doing it for me anymore, hence why i'm here. Until i was ready, nothing my mum said made me budge and it will be the same for him.

So, my advice is not to nag him because i hated when my mum did that. Your weight loss will or could be his motivation, so just keep going.