I don't know when to stop....

girlinagirdle

that's it really. I was wondering how you made a decision you had reached the right weight/size for you.

I've been going at MFP for about 9 months now. I've lost about 3 stone 3lbs (Brits), 45 lbs (Americans...) and probably a little over 20kg (for those I haven't covered...) so now I'm at 5ft 10 and around 11.5stone/160lbs/70kg roughly. I'm a healthy BMI, think I've made some long term changes to how I live my life and I can, finally, start to see the difference in myself. BUT how do I know when to stop and start to maintain?

I think I have a bit of an all or nothing approach and I'm either doing this or I'm not. I'm worried that if I stop it'll be because I've given up and maybe I could lose more, and finally I'm worried that when I stop trying to lose weight it will all go back on - which is ridiculous.

I've set my goals to lose .5lbs a week for the past two months and I'd be grateful for other peoples' thoughts and experiences to help me figure this one out.

Thank you.

DemoraFairy

I'd say when you look in the mirror and think that you don't want to change anything (anything that would change with weight loss, at least). I reached my initial goal and still wasn't happy, so I kept going. I'm now just going until I'm either happy with my body or reached the lowest weight that's healthy for my height, and if I get there and I'm still not happy I'll start weight training. But for now I want to know if I can get a body I'm happy with through diet alone.

sheepysaccount

I'd say when you look in the mirror and think that you don't want to change anything (anything that would change with weight loss, at least).

I am not sure this is the best approach as it could lead to an eating disorder. Many of those girls that stand in front of a mirror and still think they are fat can skin and bones.

OP, I think you're doing a good job. You see that you are healthy, have a good BMI (which in itself is a ridiculous thing), and you think you look pretty. You can stop right now, if you want to.
As for me, I set my goal at 70kg, when I reach it I'll stop.

davert123

For me I am not going to stop. When I stopped in the past I put the weight back on :-) I am getting towards the end of my weight loss phase as well though so I can see the problem you have. I will take on as much information as I can from the mirror and from other people around me to make sure my view of myself isn't screwed up. I think I'll get a pair of calipers and measure my fat levels as well to get a rough idea of my body composition.

skinnyinnotime

Are you happy with this weight? Do you want to lose more?

I'm 5ft 9" and I wanted to get to 10 stone/140lbs but when I got there it didn't look right for me ao I lost another 5lbs. Since then I hvae been lifting heavy and have now gone back upto 140lbs...but look different than when I was at that weight initially.

Sometimes it not more weight loss we need but maybe body recomposition.

DemoraFairy

I'd say when you look in the mirror and think that you don't want to change anything (anything that would change with weight loss, at least).

I am not sure this is the best approach as it could lead to an eating disorder. Many of those girls that stand in front of a mirror and still think they are fat can skin and bones.

True. As long as you stay in a healthy weight range, then. But I think most people would want to be happy with their bodies as well as being a healthy weight. I mean, I started only just overweight so I could have stopped about 5lbs into my diet, but I still would have been pretty miserable with my body.

lizzyclatworthy

I hear you OP! I am nearly at goal weight and too scared to weigh in because I don't know how to maintain. I like this part of the forum. I guess my plan is to adjust my calorie goal and smash the weights. But it does feel scary to be so close to goal. I have had problems stopping in the past. This is going to.be a real test!
I wish you luck. Perhaps there is a group we could both join for support?

JesterMFP

I'd say when you look in the mirror and think that you don't want to change anything (anything that would change with weight loss, at least).

I am not sure this is the best approach as it could lead to an eating disorder. Many of those girls that stand in front of a mirror and still think they are fat can skin and bones.

True. As long as you stay in a healthy weight range, then. But I think most people would want to be happy with their bodies as well as being a healthy weight. I mean, I started only just overweight so I could have stopped about 5lbs into my diet, but I still would have been pretty miserable with my body.

I think that actually, a lot of people who are a healthy weight are far from happy with their bodies, and that's even without the mental distortion that can come from losing a significant amount of weight.

OP- why do you have to decide now? There's no deadline. Given that you recognise you have an "all or nothing" approach, why don't you try maintaining for a little while and see how you feel after a bit of time of getting used to your body as it is now. If you maintain for a while, and then find that you still want to lose a bit, you can.

Losing weight can do strange things to your self-perception, and it's very normal to feel the way you're feeling. I would say, give it a bit of time and maintain for a while. Think of it as practice. Maintaining is a whole other ball game anyway, so it wouldn't hurt to get used to that. You might find you et used to how you look and are happy to stop there, or you might want to get a bit leaner. Learning to accept and love your body as it is, is important whichever you choose. As long as you still have fat on your body, there is still more you could lose - but clearly that doesn't mean you necessarily should lose more. It sounds like it's time to start getting your head around the maintaining part, whether or not you decide to drop a little more weight in the future.

girlinagirdle

I want to say thank you for everyone who has taken the time to reply. You have all given me food for thought...ha ha ha. I think the fact is there isn't a 'right' answer. We're all different. But I know it's time to start figuring it out mindful of being healthy, fit and strong.

1pandabear

well you sound perfect to me

RaggedyPond

There is always something to work on.

Francl27

Well you don't stop. You keep going... but with your goal a bit higher. When you feel comfortable with your weight, just increase your calories by 100 each week until you maintain... but otherwise, it's the same thing.