Gym Anxiety- Advice? Your experience

CompressedCarbon

Earbuds. That is my secret weapon. From the time I leave the locker room til I return, I am inside my head, listening to my music while I do whatever it is I'm doing that day. It's like there is an invisible wall around me.

Orientations helped, so I at least had a clue what the "stuff" was for and how to make them work but as a hard core introvert, what helped the most was having that wall of music around me.

Ginger is right that you'll see all kinds of people at your gym, and for me, that was encouraging. They felt like "normal" people and not juiced up supermodels. I have been going for a while now and will occasionally leave my space to smile at another regular or say "hey" to someone I see all the time, but mostly, as many have said, everyone else is pretty much in to their own thing as well.

There are a few brahillas I see routinely who I see leering at random people. But those two I just make fun of in my head because they are like conjoined twins, newly separated. But everyone else? Just people doing the same thing that I'm doing.

Just go. You won't regret it. Anxiety will decrease and comfort will come. Unless you are wearing magenta spandex; I'm still waiting to be comfortable in them.

qtgonewild

I was also terrified to start the gym. I walked for the first three months of my journey, lost 43 pounds and signed up on Nov 1st, I almost threw up with nerves in the parking lot before going in to get a membership. It was all for nothing! As soon as I walked in, I was comfortable. The first step is always the hardest!! I love the gym now. I go everyday. The gym staff is always nice to me. I'm still pretty big at 213 pounds. But I bust my *kitten* off like anyone else and feel amazing when I leave. You can do it!!! It's nowhere as bad as you think it will be.

pinksmama

I really despise the whole gym experience, beyond the normal anxieties, it's just a pain in my *kitten* plus now that I have a little one, extra no thanks..

Can you not work out at home? I mean if you really don't like it or get really anxious, why not try alternatives? No point in torturing yourself when there is lots of workable options.

I will say, I prefer classes at the gym above just making the cardio/strength machines rounds...

leannems

I highly recommend asking about trainer options for the first few rounds at the gym. The trainer can show you the basics (how to do some basic lifts, how to operate the cardio equipment), and then once you get into the swing of things, look into a good lifting program (you could hire a trainer to do this, or lots of people highly recommend the book the New Rules of Weightlifting for Women, if you feel comfortable doing it on your own). Getting some help the first few times is a really great idea, and I still go to trainers from time to time to get some new tips, or to mix things up.

I've been going to a gym on and off for 16+ years. I've been there at my heaviest (close to 300), my fittest (165 - note, I am back on the heavy side again now) and everything in between. From my own experience, I will tell you that I dealt with a lot more "attention" (both positive, negative, sideways glances, etc) when I was at my fittest. People watch more of what you are doing, ask for more tips, compete with you on the cardio machines, and you get some unwanted attention.

At my heaviest (two years or so ago - I'm still very overweight now, but strength training has caused me to lose a few sizes), no one at the gym pays me any attention, except for the gym buddies I've met, and that's just to say hi briefly. Some of this may be because I'm a regular (so I'm at the gym 3-5x a week), so most folks are used to seeing me there, but honestly, for the most part, people are just there to work out. People who are there to be snarky rarely end up being there regularly, and you won't see them there for long (although, to be honest, I can't even remember the last time anyone at the gym was snarky - and I am a big girl who sweats her butt off at the gym). A lot of the other regulars I see are all different weights too - some my size, some much, much thinner, and we're all very nice to one another because we all know that we are regulars, and there to do work.

So see if you can get an employee to help you out the first few times, and if you end up going regularly, you won't be nervous anymore. And I don't know if my gym is like a special snowflake or something, but honestly, no one there is crappy about anyone else. We're all just there to sweat it out.

seltzermint555

The thing that always kept me from joining a gym (along with anxiety) was that a lot of gyms, even the Y, required a weigh-in, doctor's note, and/or initial meeting with a trainer and I did not want to do ANY of that stuff!

I've never encountered this at Gold's, the YMCA, or any of the several independent gyms to which I've had memberships. Some will offer a free personal training appointment but you can always decline it. That said, having someone walk you around a gym can be very helpful for someone new.

I wouldn't mind that stuff now (although the doc note might be inconvenient to obtain) but when I was much heavier it really freaked me out. I am glad to hear it's not like that everywhere. I know Curves (are they even still around?) and our local Y both required notes and weigh-ins for new members.

mank32

i started out super self-conscious about my workouts: i park it on the mat and do at least 30 min of physical therapy consisting of modified yoga/stretching/bodyweight/dance ("fauxga") that looks like posing for a kama sutra manual and i'm not at all kidding about this: rear in the air, legs over head, spread legs, sticking out rear, etc. going in i thought it would be really awkward, for myself and anyone around me. turns out not to be the case. surprise, surprise! no one stares at me. if anything, it seems like peeps avoid me during my routine (which is defo best for me, and prolly best for them too). if peeps at my gym can ignore the girl doing the stripper routine on the mat, i think you'll be fine.

qtgonewild

My only bad experience from a gym was when I got my hair cut into my fauxhawk and now I look like the "obvious" lesbian (not that I think that is what I look like but that is the stereotype these days) and I get glares from the typical older generation and stares from people in general I mean, If I saw a kick *kitten* chick with a fauxhawk lifting heavy weights I'd stare too (just kidding I'm not that conceited) but the best advice I can give you is have confidence, hold your head up high, and show them your strength with a smile on your face. That typical saying, "Keep your head up high, people would kill to see you fall" well, there you go. Prove everyone (everyone meaning the awkward people in the gym) and yourself that you can do it!

I am the typical lesbian with a fauxhawk. no problems here. but i wear a hat most days. lol

goalie234

Well this is what i read before joining the gym ... Try it ... It worked brilliantly for me .. And i have this bookmarked for life .. Lol

http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/easy-steps-to-start-not-giving-a-f

SunofaBeach14

The thing that always kept me from joining a gym (along with anxiety) was that a lot of gyms, even the Y, required a weigh-in, doctor's note, and/or initial meeting with a trainer and I did not want to do ANY of that stuff!

I've never encountered this at Gold's, the YMCA, or any of the several independent gyms to which I've had memberships. Some will offer a free personal training appointment but you can always decline it. That said, having someone walk you around a gym can be very helpful for someone new.

I wouldn't mind that stuff now (although the doc note might be inconvenient to obtain) but when I was much heavier it really freaked me out. I am glad to hear it's not like that everywhere. I know Curves (are they even still around?) and our local Y both required notes and weigh-ins for new members.

I can see that being an impediment for new members. That's a shame that they feel those are necessary in some areas.

walkinthedogs

I hear you on the panic feelings. My biggest fear was the weight room because at the Rec Center I go to, it is mostly men and I am intimidated by the weights because I don't really feel like I "know" what I'm doing, but I found a weight training program, read and read and read, watched video's and practiced form like crazy, read forums here and that helped my anxiety a ton. So I picked a time when they were the least busy and just went in and worked. Loved it! For me, it's getting over that first time hump, once I've done something one time, I then know I can do it and the anxiety is diminished and the more I go, the more the anxiety goes completely away.

This really isn't the on the subject, but it helps me when I'm scared to try something new. I have a sister that has cerebral palsy. She is one of the "lucky" one's, as she can walk, mostly unassisted, she uses a cane now and again, when some are wheelchair bound. CP affects motor skills, not intelligence. She goes to the gym every day and water walks. She gets stared at all the time, no matter where she goes and what she does, but she does it anyway. She does it anyway. I don't know if I could, I don't know if I could do what she does because she gets stared at all the time. I know because I watch people and watch them watch her. People are generally never rude to her, although we've encountered some real a-holes as well, but they stare. She's different, she walks funny and talks funny and people stare, but she does it anyway. And that's what I tell myself, She.Does,It,Anyway. You can go to the gym, you'll be fine.

karenann1684

I first stepped foot in a gym when I was 17 years old (I'm 47 now). I was TERRIFIED!!! You see at the time I had social anxiety about anything new. Wouldn't even walk into a fast food restaurant by myself I was that scared. I remember driving round and round the gym parking lot just getting up the nerve to walk in. I wanted to exercise because I was having severe migraines and thought this would help me reduce my stress.

What happened next surprised me. I ended up falling in love with the gym!! So weird right? I love it like I love the library or bookstores. You can do your own thing and NOBODY bothers you!!! Seriously!! Everyone body has earplugs in their ears and they don't even give you a second glance.

These days I work out at home to dvd's only because it's more efficient (I have 3 kids and time is limited). I look forward to the day when I have more free time because if I did I'd live in the gym.

My sincere advice is to face your fears and try it. You may just love it like I did.

chelseabuns88

What it all boils down to is that I am a competitive perfectionist and I don't like being the newbie or the worst at things. The idea of going to a gym and working out makes me 100X more nervous than giving a speech to hundreds of people or going to a big job interview. Those things are no big deal to me.

Anyway yep. Gym anxiety. hehe

100% this!

I like everyone to think I know exactly what I'm doing and I'm terrified about making foolish mistakes. I've always been too hard on myself in this respect, instead of admitting I don't know EVERYTHING and getting help with it, I'd rather just avoid it altogether..

With that said, in the past year I've done loads of things that've pushed me out of my comfort zone and I'm only better for it… And I wouldn't say I'm particularly unfit (compared with friends and family) it's more the motivation to exercise, I can just about complete a 10 minute work out at home before finding a suitable distraction!

krissy0474

I was exactly where you are right now, about a month and a half ago. I decided I wanted to make a change and I felt that I needed a personal trainer to get me started. Aside from going to the gym a few times with friends in the past, I had not gone to the gym - with any sense of dedication - at all in my 31 years. Late last year, I tried going to the gym by myself the first time - I managed 20 minutes of walking on the treadmill and then left because I thought I was being judged. Yes, I thought people were judging me for walking on the treadmill. That's when the personal trainer came into play. I wanted to achieve my goals and I was not going to let my anxiety get in the way, like it has in many other aspects of my life.

IMO - if you are really new to working out and want to know how to do it right, I recommend getting a personal training session or two. (or 10, like me!) My trainer and I discussed what I like to do, what I don't like to do, what my health limitations are, what my goals are, etc. I don't know why, but when I have sessions with my trainer, it feels as though I'm the only one in the gym. I don't pay attention to what other people are thinking because my trainer keeps me occupied.

After 8 sessions with her (twice a week), I decided that I was going to start going a few days on my own - with some of the programs she created for me. The first time I went, I did my warm-up, no problem. After that, the gym was busy and all the machines I was comfortable using were tied up. Cue anxiety. I stood there looking at each machine in a complete state of panic. Instead of leaving, like I normally would, I decided to go into a corner and do some mat work (crunches, etc.) By the time I was done, the gym was virtually empty. Ahh! I didn't want to leave, I kept waltzing from one machine to the next, doing more than my initial 60 minute workout goal.

Since then, I've gone maybe about a half dozen times on my own and I am addicted. Some days have been better than others, but I make the effort regardless. I feel that each time I go, I am telling my anxiety to stuff it.

I still have two more personal training sessions to go, but I have spaced them out. In a few months, I will get a few more sessions so that we can assess how far I've come and amp it up a bit, since I'm a newbie and might not know just how far I can push myself.

Good luck! You can do it, you just have to battle through it.