Females and Fat-Acceptance Movement.

heatherloveslifting

Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive.

Says who??? I eat well, lift and run..... Shyt.... I am fabulous! Do I have to wait until I hit what society says is perfect before I like me?

What is not attractive is laziness, complaining about weight while doing nothing about it. But will love my body now and when I get it to where I want it to be.

Also, appearance/weight is not the #1 priority for everyone. Some people might place their education, or their career, or caring for children, or other family members, or charity work, or changing the world, or whatever, as their top priority. We find time for things that are important to us. Some people spend all of the energy they have battling grief or poverty. I do feel that yes, all things being equal, of course it is better to be healthy. But all things are never equal.

Jess732008

Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.

I had that quite a bit growing up but it never really helped. I think the fat acceptance movement is mainly women because they want to feel like they are loved, accepted and valuable even if they are fat, just like other people want to feel accepted in spite of their faults. Women generally know they have a problem with their weight, and may have tried to lose weight but were never able to for various reasons so they just give in and figure they may be heavy forever. If you have tried for years and failed, it can make you want to quit trying or just take a break from trying for a while until you are ready and able to lose weight.

Jess732008

I prefer body acceptance and positivity to fat acceptance. My reasons for this are that body acceptance covers all body types, and fat acceptance promotes an unhealthy lifestyle in some cases.

I support body positivity in combination with a healthy lifestyle- this means we can all be healthy mentally AND physically!

This is a great point.

Crimson_Fire

Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.

^ You make sense.:happy:

Jess732008

Nobody has a right to criticize you for your size or physical appearance.

However; "health at any size" is a head-in-the-sand statement. If you are obese, you are unhealthy, will have a shorter lifespan and are at risk of disease. That's just a reality. Whether you accept the reality or not doesn't change it.

"Fat shaming" is wrong. Yes. It's wrong to be judgemental, critical, or hateful of anyone for the choices they make for themselves. You can be big and beautiful too, sure. Beauty isn't empirical. It's entirely up to the audience. But you are not healthy, and that's not "just who you are", you are the size you chose to be. That's just life.

I think more people would be healthier if they realized two things. 1) It's not 'just the way you are'. Trust me, that was my excuse for many many years. You are obese because you eat too much and/or you eat unhealthy foods. It's just a reality. 2) It's okay to be obese. Sure! I agree, actually. It's perfectly fine, that's your choice. It's also fine to smoke, and go rock climbing without a harness. The difference is the latter two seem to admit the additional risks with those choices more often.

Being born with freckles, dark skin, fair skin, 7 toes or 3 eyeballs are "genetics". Taking in too many calories and being obese is not "genetics". Says the formerly 330 lb man who was "big boned", "bad genes", and "slow metabolism" for way too long. When I finally decided I was fat I lost nearly 100 pounds (and counting).

Hi, I like a lot of what you have to say, but for me I have wanted to be thin and known I was fat for over 20 years, from the time I was a young girl. I have tried different things to lose weight and changed my diet. The most I have lost is 60 lbs at a time. Then I get tired of being hungry and never having my favorite unhealthy foods and start eating whatever I wanted. A short time later and after gaining back my weight I decided to restrict again and have made huge progress in my binging problem and lost some weight, 40 lbs. Healthy eating is more natural but I still have some times when I want cookies, cake, and other rich foods. I have been trying to figure out what is holding me back for a long time. It may be my extremism. I tend to go hog wild, restrict my calories drastically ( for me considering binge eating has been a major problem for me throughout my life) and change everything overnight, while denying myself my favorite unhealthy foods. I do the same thing with exercise. I love to exercise when I start and then I get so excited that I go overboard and end up hurting myself. I guess I need to restrain my enthusiasm and just lose weight slow and build up exercise slow--or something similar. I don't know. I would just like to know the key to unlock whatever is holding me back and keeping me from losing all of the weight. Another idea I have is that I should do basic counting of my calories and then build up to a higher level of activity each day so I can eat more and still lose weight. That will take time so I don't hurt myself regularly. I don't know. It is so frustrating.

ashleyblossom1

Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.

At the same time who are you to tell someone how to live their life? If some people want to feel good about themselves regardless of their appearance how can you judge them? I personally believe everyone needs to mind their own business about bodies that aren't their own. Not everyone wants a rude awakening. People will figure it out in their own time when they are ready. If someone would've tried to "kick me in the right direction" back when I wasn't ready, they would've gotten kicked in the *kitten*. Some people are the sensitive types and telling them to get off their fat *kitten* would've made them worse.

I think the people who believe in fat acceptance just want to feel beautiful and happy with themselves no matter what their size is. And good for them for still being able to find confidence in themselves. Are they supposed to walk around hating themselves because you or anyone else doesn't find them attractive? No. People are just over-concerned with other people. I'd like everyone to try to be healthy for themselves but if they don't want to then I hope they find another way to be happy.

ldrosophila

the chair of NAFFA is a male

I'm sure there are plenty of men in the movement


http://www.naafaonline.com/dev2/about/Board.html

ldrosophila

oh and someone can correct me if im wrong but I think one of the most vocal lawyers of fat discrimination lawsuits is a male

mccindy72

I also don't think that it's all necessarily about fat acceptance, but accepting that you can be not perfect and still beautiful. When you look at magazines and models, it's hard to see that. They are literally the prettiest people in the world, and we see them on a daily basis.

This type of thinking is such a mistake. Models are not the most beautiful people in the world. Most of them (if you look just at their faces) are actually rather plain. And if you see them without makeup, they look just like the rest of us. Their bodies, when they haven't been readying themselves for a shoot or a show, are far from perfect. Makeup, photoshop and airbrushing give a false sense of beauty to people who really aren't as perfect as they seem . It's sad to me that so many people still look to that as the "ideal" for what we are all supposed to look like.

ImpishVanity

I also don't think that it's all necessarily about fat acceptance, but accepting that you can be not perfect and still beautiful. When you look at magazines and models, it's hard to see that. They are literally the prettiest people in the world, and we see them on a daily basis.

This type of thinking is such a mistake. Models are not the most beautiful people in the world. Most of them (if you look just at their faces) are actually rather plain. And if you see them without makeup, they look just like the rest of us. Their bodies, when they haven't been readying themselves for a shoot or a show, are far from perfect. Makeup, photoshop and airbrushing give a false sense of beauty to people who really aren't as perfect as they seem . It's sad to me that so many people still look to that as the "ideal" for what we are all supposed to look like.

So much this. I mean, have any of you watched that "America's Next Top Model" show? I caught an episode once and all I could think is "Wow these girls are ugly". Until they did a shoot of course. Then the pictures turned out AMAZING. But it really showed me how fake and meaningless these pictures really are, and how pointless it would be to compare myself to them. I have a WAY prettier face than any of them that I've seen. I'm not stick-thin, but I have curves in the right places and many of them are just... planks.

I'm fat and not ashamed. I WAS ashamed. But that only made me miserable and hide away. And eat. I decided to love myself. And part of loving myself is working on myself. That's really all we need. Love for ourselves and others. I don't care what any of my friends look like, but if they want help getting healthy I'll help them in whatever way they need. Other than that, there is no need to get involved in someone else's image.

OliveRiver

unlike men who if they are fat are made fun of sometimes yea sure but lets say you see a fat man with a really hot women...no one says anything really do they? just WAY TO GO MAN YAY YOU DESERVE IT

No, we think either he is rolling in cash or has a kick *kitten* personality.

This exactly. And typically, it's the former.

summertime_girl

Some people are the sensitive types and telling them to get off their fat *kitten* would've made them worse.

Of course you don't need to say it like this. But say you have a friend who is a sensitive type, and they are killing themselves slowly with drugs, an abusive relationship, anorexia, you just accept it because you don't want to hurt their feelings because they are sensitive?

I wouldn't, because I love my friends. There's obviously ways to encourage for different situations. For my friends who are fat (and note that the word "fat" is merely a descriptor, not an insult") I encourage them to hit the gym with me, do an OCR, go for a walk, come for a ride, etc. They all know what I looked like before. How lousy I felt. I want them to feel how I do physically.

ItsCasey

Every blog and website I visited on this topic were always written by women. Why is that? Why aren't more men involved with this?

I think the better question is why aren't there fewer women involved with this?

Spend any amount of time in the fat acceptance blogging community, and you will come to understand that it's not about "loving yourself at any size." It's about castigating people for wanting to be thinner and healthier. Those people live in abject denial about the long-term consequences of being obese. They've thrown in the towel on their own lives, and they want to mock and scorn anyone who dares to do the opposite. It's how they rationalize just staying fat.

mccindy72

Every blog and website I visited on this topic were always written by women. Why is that? Why aren't more men involved with this?

I think the better question is why aren't there fewer women involved with this?

Spend any amount of time in the fat acceptance blogging community, and you will come to understand that it's not about "loving yourself at any size." It's about castigating people for wanting to be thinner and healthier. Those people live in abject denial about the long-term consequences of being obese. They've thrown in the towel on their own lives, and they want to mock and scorn anyone who dares to do the opposite. It's how they rationalize just staying fat.

+1

Expect_The_Worst

Why does it seem that it's mostly women who are vocal about body acceptance, fat acceptance, and health at every size?

Every blog and website I visited on this topic were always written by women. Why is that? Why aren't more men involved with this?

Because they are too busy playing video games or drinking beer to be bothered with blogging about it?

HardcoreP0rk

I think fat aggression is way creepier than fat acceptance. People need to chill out...

rml_16

Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.

I do agree with that when it comes to health issues. I don't like that people just want to say, "I'm fat and I can't help it, so everyone should just accept that." It's not a disability or a race or something, for most people, it's something that is entirely under your control. So it's tough to watch people do hurtful things to themselves and then want acceptance for that.

The women in the fat acceptance movement will not respond positively to that kind of tough love. Heck, I wouldn't, either. I don't need someone to tell me I need to lose weight. I have clothes (getting tighter) and a mirror. Geesh.

But I have a friend who's very involved in that movement. She actually thinks it's "sad" that I want to improve my appearance and she got very, very angry with me because over the course of a year, three times I invited her to go for a walk with me (and not because of her weight, simply because I was going and it was good social time).

HardcoreP0rk

It's not about being "young-looking and beautiful", and I think "thin" is the wrong term to use. It's about being at a healthy weight and not making excuses for overeating and living a sedentary lifestyle. The current argument for 'fat acceptance' is usually an in-your-face statement that makes it sound like having any issues with someone being overweight is some kind of discrimination. It's not discrimination when it's a choice. It may be a tough choice, but it's still a choice.

There are a lot of choices that we legally cannot discriminate against...like having children or being married. Fact is, people who are overweight are discriminated against in the workplace. Just because it is your choice doesn't mean that it should not be protected against discrimination.

ETA: I'm not sure the above has anything to do with the fat acceptance "movement" but I thought it was important to point out.

rml_16

Every blog and website I visited on this topic were always written by women. Why is that? Why aren't more men involved with this?

I think the better question is why aren't there fewer women involved with this?

Spend any amount of time in the fat acceptance blogging community, and you will come to understand that it's not about "loving yourself at any size." It's about castigating people for wanting to be thinner and healthier. Those people live in abject denial about the long-term consequences of being obese. They've thrown in the towel on their own lives, and they want to mock and scorn anyone who dares to do the opposite. It's how they rationalize just staying fat.

+1

Also this.

ThinLizzie0802

fat-acceptance is not the same as body-acceptance
I see this as one size does not fit all and that does not mean you're overweight or unhealthy, not I'm fat and happy and deal with it

bearsgal9

while I consider myself to be somewhat of a smart *kitten*/jokester who takes things too far, I think that making fun of anyone for their appearance is wrong. Whether they are too skinny or too fat, it makes no difference, it is cruel and unwarranted. Is being fat healthy? hell no! is being fat "wrong"? I don't think so. do I think being fat should be "accepted/glorified"? no, it shouldn't. but I think that people should be accepted for who they are, and if they happen to be fat, so be it.

THIS!!

HardcoreP0rk

Huh. This also works with Eating Disorder Awareness week.

The blogs I follow for "fat acceptance" is more of the type of yeah we're fat but why does that mean we have to be hidden away? Why do you think so many overweight people are afraid of the gym? Are we fat people supposed to avoid swimming because fit people are there and might be offended? Are we not supposed to go out to the clubs and enjoy ourselves because we jiggle?? Forget that, I may be fat but I'm still going to go out, have fun and get healthy. Your opinion of me doesn't make me who I am.

Learning to accept yourself for who and what you are goes a LONG way in getting healthy.

That's a really good point. You don't have to be ashamed when your health isn't where it should be. If you know you need to lose a few pounds, you should still be comfortable living life without being vilified or judged for your waistline. You should be candid and realistic about your health and goals without experiencing unfair negativity in life.

rml_16

Huh. This also works with Eating Disorder Awareness week.

The blogs I follow for "fat acceptance" is more of the type of yeah we're fat but why does that mean we have to be hidden away? Why do you think so many overweight people are afraid of the gym? Are we fat people supposed to avoid swimming because fit people are there and might be offended? Are we not supposed to go out to the clubs and enjoy ourselves because we jiggle?? Forget that, I may be fat but I'm still going to go out, have fun and get healthy. Your opinion of me doesn't make me who I am.

Learning to accept yourself for who and what you are goes a LONG way in getting healthy.

That's a really good point. You don't have to be ashamed when your health isn't where it should be. If you know you need to lose a few pounds, you should still be comfortable living life without being vilified or judged for your waistline. You should be candid and realistic about your health and goals without experiencing unfair negativity in life.

The blogs I've seen make gand claims that being morbidly obese is actually healthier than being a normal weight ...

HardcoreP0rk

Huh. This also works with Eating Disorder Awareness week.

The blogs I follow for "fat acceptance" is more of the type of yeah we're fat but why does that mean we have to be hidden away? Why do you think so many overweight people are afraid of the gym? Are we fat people supposed to avoid swimming because fit people are there and might be offended? Are we not supposed to go out to the clubs and enjoy ourselves because we jiggle?? Forget that, I may be fat but I'm still going to go out, have fun and get healthy. Your opinion of me doesn't make me who I am.

Learning to accept yourself for who and what you are goes a LONG way in getting healthy.

That's a really good point. You don't have to be ashamed when your health isn't where it should be. If you know you need to lose a few pounds, you should still be comfortable living life without being vilified or judged for your waistline. You should be candid and realistic about your health and goals without experiencing unfair negativity in life.

The blogs I've seen make gand claims that being morbidly obese is actually healthier than being a normal weight ...

Yea, I'm aware that that is out there. I just wouldn't paint everyone with that broad brush. I sincerely hope that "fat acceptance" is more about loving your body throughout your fitness journey and protecting people from unfair discrimination. But I do understand that there is a cohort in support of being fat for fat's sake.

And I certainly wouldnt tell someone that their fat is disgusting and that they need to change because they're killing themselves.

ItsCasey

The blogs I've seen make gand claims that being morbidly obese is actually healthier than being a normal weight ...

And, ironically, that wanting to lose weight and be healthier means you hate yourself. Because if you loved yourself, you'd be happy being morbidly obese. Or something.

craftywitch_63

Possibly there is sooooo much more pressure on women to be thin, young-looking & beautiful and some women are standing up to say enough is enough.

^^^This. Also, a 400 lb man can look in the mirror, smile and believe he's the hottest thing for miles. A 103 lb woman looks in the mirror, cries and tells herself she's fat.

I've thought about this a lot. Here's what I think. The female fashion industry is basically run by gay males (I do NOT have anything against gay males. I acutally have a transvestite living in my home until he can get on his feet) if you don't believe it, watch "Project Runway." The gay males dictate that women be stick thin because that way they look more like men (look at the shapes of popular models - no body fat, no jiggling, broad shoulders, some muscle definition). I think if women took back the women's fashion industry, clothes would be made to look good on more realistically shaped women.



Marilyn Monroe was a size 8 at her largest but she had CURVES!

HardcoreP0rk

Possibly there is sooooo much more pressure on women to be thin, young-looking & beautiful and some women are standing up to say enough is enough.

^^^This. Also, a 400 lb man can look in the mirror, smile and believe he's the hottest thing for miles. A 103 lb woman looks in the mirror, cries and tells herself she's fat.

I've thought about this a lot. Here's what I think. The female fashion industry is basically run by gay males (I do NOT have anything against gay males. I acutally have a transvestite living in my home until he can get on his feet) if you don't believe it, watch "Project Runway." The gay males dictate that women be stick thin because that way they look more like men (look at the shapes of popular models - no body fat, no jiggling, broad shoulders, some muscle definition). I think if women took back the women's fashion industry, clothes would be made to look good on more realistically shaped women.


Marilyn Monroe was a size 8 at her largest but she had CURVES!

Yea, maybe a dressmaker's 8 but not a vanity-sized Old Navy 8

And the fashion industry doesnt want women to look like men. They want women to look like hangers.

Sunbrooke

Being fat is a health problem. It isn't good for fat people and it isn't good for the rest of us either. I liked the comparison in Super Size Me, where he brought up the fact that people feel righteous in chastising someone for smoking, since it is killing them and endangering the health of those around them, but no one runs up and says something to a fat person chowing down on some supersized fries, coke, and burger. Then when they get health problems, we all feel the pain as insurance rates rise. The worst part is that they usually feed their kids like this too! I once saw a man telling his fat little girl that she couldn't have a shake if she didn't finish her chicken nuggets and fries! I wanted to call CPS. Sorry. That's definitely on the angry side of the spectrum for me, but I felt like ranting a little. Obviously some people have healthy issues that make them fat.

rml_16

The blogs I've seen make gand claims that being morbidly obese is actually healthier than being a normal weight ...

And, ironically, that wanting to lose weight and be healthier means you hate yourself. Because if you loved yourself, you'd be happy being morbidly obese. Or something.

That seems to be the main sentiment of the movement and is why I have a problem with it.

Yea, I'm aware that that is out there. I just wouldn't paint everyone who that broad brush. I sincerely hope that "fat acceptance" is more about loving your body throughout your fitness journey and protecting people from unfair discrimination. But I do understand that there is a cohort in support of being fat for fat's sake.

See, I don't think that's the fat acceptance movement, though. That's women who have decided that their body is not the entirety of who they are as human beings and I am totally on board with that. What I look like doesn't change anything about my personality or worthiness. Some of the best people I know are overweight or obese. I love them and hope they love themselves. And I think loving onesself is important in order to make positive changes, to believe you deserve it.

It's the "we're better because we're fat" that I have a problem with and seems to be the prevailing point in the fat acceptance movement.

The stidy they base the "we're healthier" thing on is actually about women who are about 10-15 pounds over a "healthy" BMI, not women who are obese or morbidly obese.

rml_16

Marilyn Monroe was a size 8 at her largest but she had CURVES!

She had CURVES because her natural skeletal form was an hourglass. She would have CURVES at a size 00 (if it existed back then).

She had a 24-inch waist. I have her same proportions, but my waist is 28 inches right now and I wear a size 8 in today's sizes. Using MM to justify being overweight is ridiculous. She wasn't overweight. She was actually extremely thin through most of her career.

And since 8% of the female population is an hourglass, she is not a "more realistic" female form. 92% of women cannot look like that, no matter what.