Frustrated with everything

ElizMayes12

I am so glad you brought up this topic because it happens too frequently - those around us may mean to be supportive (or not) and wind up saying and doing things that cause the frustration you are experiencing. You've gotten a lot of great advice in this posting thread, so I won't repeat those things, but rather offer two slightly different perspectives. The first is that on some level your family, and mother in particular, probably does have good intentions. After all, she raised you and you seem a splendid person, so that means she cares and is trying in her own way to connect with you. Sometimes, it is easier to obsess over what someone else is doing rather than focus on your own stuff, and maybe you are providing a topic that creates that distraction. Maybe not, I am just guessing. My general experience is that parents mean well, and at times pick a less than elegant or optimal way to be supportive. The second is the idea of treating yourself. I agree with the others - 1,000 calories a day is just unhealthy; too often those are the diets we fall off of because it's just not sustainable. Like the others, focusing on a healthy intake (maybe more like 1,400 - 1,600 calls/day), you will still make progress but feel better. I am not much on junk food - my indulgence is my glass of wine on the weekends. I struggled at first to accept/decline invitations to go for drinks after work or out to dinner on the weekend until I came up with a system that allows me some freedom and to keep things in control. One glass of sauvignon-blanc at 5 -6 ounces has on average 80 calories. I allow myself that on Fridays and Saturdays only and two glasses only. That way if I get invited to the company outing at happy hour, I know exactly what I am going to order, and how many calories it has, and I only go on weekend nights. By placing limits around my "indulgence", I am able to indulge in a way that does not undermine my health and weight loss. Since I do not eat desserts or conventional junk food, this system works for me with healthy protein, vegetable, fruit diets throughout the week and weekend, working out 4 -5 days a week, and the inches are coming off. We find own way to make sure we feel fulfilled and balanced on this path - and you too will find yours. Just keep at it, and do not get discouraged. What matters is how you feel. Congratulations on taking this step and reaching out - it takes bravery to do so!

NitaBethT

I am new here so I don't know what the 30 D.S. is but I would like to suggest this... One of the best things you can do for yourself is make exercise fun. Pick someone out to buddy up with - perhaps someone who just needs a friend if no one seems to be available. Then go for walks - 1 mile at a time is good. Or take out the bike and have races. The idea is to do something that makes you move. Even a Wii Fitness can be fun or the sports for games just to get moving.

Where I live there is a nice park very close by that has a trail for walkers, joggers, and people on wheels. Those on wheels go in the opposite direction around and the trail is 1.2 miles long through the trees around the tennis courts and past the baseball diamond - a super nice trail.

Jkn921

Thank you all so much for the kind-hearted replies.

I forgot to mention my mother is a little obsessed with losing weight herself so to see me doing well she's never said well done but more like you need to do this now...as if she is the reason I lost weight and owe it all to her It's ridiculous to me personally as I put in all the work without any help. When I was in my 161lbs I was scolded so much for being overweight when I was deeply depressed, I got out of it and lost a lot of weight, have good eating habits and exercise regularly. The situation is as if my Mum puts on weight, it will somehow be taken out on me - the anger and frustration as it was my fault lol. And in turn of that my mum will deliberately drag me down.

Empty_Calories

Thank you all so much for the kind-hearted replies.

I forgot to mention my mother is a little obsessed with losing weight herself so to see me doing well she's never said well done but more like you need to do this now...as if she is the reason I lost weight and owe it all to her It's ridiculous to me personally as I put in all the work without any help. When I was in my 161lbs I was scolded so much for being overweight when I was deeply depressed, I got out of it and lost a lot of weight, have good eating habits and exercise regularly. The situation is as if my Mum puts on weight, it will somehow be taken out on me - the anger and frustration as it was my fault lol. And in turn of that my mum will deliberately drag me down.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Dealing with weight is stressful enough without added pressure. You've already gotten a lot of great advice so I don't think I have much to add.

One question though, do you think it would help to show your mother this website? You could explain how you've made your progress and the plan you're following so that 1) she'd know that your goals aren't too far away and 2) maybe help put her on a plan so she can enjoy her own success.

I wish you the best. Good luck!