Scared new gal needing help

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Well.. . I am the 2nd day in and I am already frustrated.

I dont know if I'm starting to sabotage myself or am I just being weak. I'm confused on what to make, eat, stay away from and my #1 fear is EXERCISE.

I'm on the cusp of becoming 39 years old and here it is. . . I am about 210 lbs 5'7". I go to work (mainly sitting) go home. I have 2 teens that do their own thing. I make dinner and then I go to my bed and watch TV. I eat dinner at 8pm ish and that's it.

The reason why I know that change is a must.

1. I have hanging disgusting belly fat that feels like it's trying to rip off my body because its heavy.
2. I see my daughter doing the same thing as me.
3. I hate hate hate how I feel. My stomach hurts, I'm depressed, absolutely no energy or motivation.

This needs to change. But as all of you know, I'm afraid.

Is 1200 cal to little for me? is it realistic? where do I find the right foods? and then there is the EXERCISE. I want to be addicted to exercise but the thought of it makes me sleepy. I don't want to burn out to soon into this.

Replies

  • Cynner2007
    Cynner2007 Posts: 46 Member
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    Please don't be discouraged. Is it possible to think of taking things in baby steps? Instead of thinking about losing 50 lbs, could you break it down into 5 lbs increments? What is your exercise plan? Gym? DVDs? Walking? Perhaps you can make a promise to yourself to do at least 20 minutes of some activity at least three times a week? You can add more time and more days in as you get proficient. You just have to start doing it, it will get easier....

    Good luck..:)
  • loghynsmama
    loghynsmama Posts: 4 Member
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    First of all, you're already making a commitment to change just by making a profile for yourself on here.

    I just turned 39 in January . . . and 5' 7" . . . single working mom. The difference is, when I started I weighed about 312 lbs. I've lost 89 lbs total (including the 12 that shows on my profile). I still am at 228 lbs. But it's been SO worth it.

    Remember, you matter. And every single little thing that you do to make a change matters too.

    Start off by eating what you normally do for a couple days. LOG EVERYTHING!! Even creamer in your coffee. You'll be amazed by how much you actually are consuming.

    Next, review those logs and see where you could have made a better choice. I had a real eye opener when I logged a Son of Baconator from Wendy's. WHEW!! No WONDER I got so big!!

    Then start upping your activity. Go for a 10 minute walk when you can throughout the day. Take the stairs instead of the elevator for a floor . . . then two . . . then three. :)

    Change is always scary. But once you start seeing the small results (and the big ones) you'll see why it's so worth it.

    As far as your calorie count goes, I always tell people to go the The Biggest Loser website and use their calorie calculator. You put in your age, weight, height, activity level . . . it gives you the amount to eat to MAINTAIN your weight. Then the standard is to eat 500 calories less per day than that to lose 1 lb. per week. Keep in mind that you should NOT starve yourself. You can't run a car with no gas.

    HANG IN THERE!! You'll do wonderfully as long as you focus on you for a change. My guess is it's been all about the kids till now. Boy do I understand! But you will feel so much better once you take the next step and start taking care of yourself!!

    Send me a friend request if you'd like. I'd be glad to help encourage you.

    Take care!
  • 24lol25
    24lol25 Posts: 49
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    1200 is fine. Using the foods that have lower fat should have less calories. Fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and all of that is good. To start out, you could plan out foods to eat for one day and see how much it adds up too. For protein, fish is really good. (Salmon, tilapia.) certain nuts may be better than others as well. Steamable vegetable bags are a good way to get vegtables. Or use spinich leaves instead of iceberg lettuce in a salad. Having an apple, banana, blueberries, oranges are all good to eat. If you eat pasta, just always get the whole grain kind. For more detailed information on all sorts of foods, it's best to do a lot of web browsing. And a way to have less calories is to have almond milk instead of the regular kind. It can be hard to get used to, but very worth it. Stay away from things that are high in hydrogenated fat, have a lot of simple sugars, or drinks with empty calories. (Soda.) you can start small with exercise and work your way up. Try walking around a couple of blocks for a few days. Gradually increase from that and it won't seem so bad at all. Stretching often is important too. And lastly, don't be afraid! Have faith in yourself and do the best you possibly can. :)
  • valj20
    valj20 Posts: 14 Member
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    The 5 pound increment is a super good idea! It helps you look at it in a different light! Also, slowly add things in every month if that helps out. Like, only cut out soda this month, then next month add in walking every other day or whatever is comfortable. Then add in more vegetables. All at a slow and steady rate.

    It helps me a lot to see where my calories come from, leafy greens and vegetables are super low cal that I can eat buckets of em and still be in my limit. Where as if I eat a lot of bread or cereal, I'll max out my calories and still feel unsatisfied.

    Just take it slow, and add things in whenever you start to feel too comfortable.
    You can do this!
  • briannagravelle
    briannagravelle Posts: 23 Member
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    Hi everyone I am new to mfp it as been a month of using it now lost 11 pounds, before was doing weight watchers and lost 80 pounds now with a 91 pounds lost I cant seem to loose more, need tricks and motivation , new mfp friends pleasee ad me !! briannagravelle :)
  • fivespotter
    fivespotter Posts: 11 Member
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    You have made a step in the right direction by establishing your account. I purchased a fitbit flex and that tracks my steps and sleep. I input everything I eat on this site and it calculates how many calories I need to stay at to stay on track to lose the weight I want to lose. I would say that 1200 calories is maybe a bit to low to start. Depends on you though. But, you must log EVERYTHING you eat and drink. A good program to start exercising with is C25K. (Couch to 5k) Remember you didn't gain all the weight overnight so don't think you will lose it all overnight. Stick to it! Maybe you can find some friends to walk/jog/run with. Get a bicycle, instead of driving places ride your bike on occassion. You can do anything that you want to do if you just keep trying!
  • allbarrett
    allbarrett Posts: 159 Member
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    I'm older than you are and though I didn't decide I needed to lose as much, I remember the feeling of "OMG I have to do something!".

    The poster above is right. You've committed to making a change, that is the first step.

    My next step (and this is just me, everyone comes up with their own plan) was to just cut down a bit on one meal per day. Seriously, that was it. Instead of eating my whole dinner, I put some of it away in the fridge before even sitting down to eat. My division was about 2/3 on my plate and 1/3 in the fridge. The stuff in the fridge became the basis of my lunch the next day. I did this every day. I ate the same foods I've always enjoyed, just a little less at ONE SINGLE MEAL. I didn't allow myself to snack more to make up for it either. I dropped 1/3 of my goal just by doing this.

    Once I got used to that (and having hit 1/3 my "to lose" target), I started counting calories seriously. I got a food scale, I started on the logging phase. LOG EVERYTHING YOU EAT. Nothing is exempt. Hold yourself accountable. That is when I started following MFP (I did my first step without MFP, it would have been easier if I'd found this website first!). I dropped another 1/3 of the way to my goal just by counting calories.

    At 2/3 of the way to my goal, I added in exercise. My knees were shot (old injury), so I started with a tai chi class....about as low impact as you can get. I walked to class and back (this was a huge step, the walk alone was around 3 km round trip...WAY more than I could do before), twice a week. Then my employer offered a "boot camp" after work. I tried that and really enjoyed it. Then they offered discounted gym memberships, and I never looked back. I'm in maintenance, I've just started lifting heavy (as opposed to the circuit training style I learned from the class at work). I run a couple of days a week. I love the exercise, I'm less stressed at work, I sleep better. The only downside is all the expensive clothing I have to give away because it literally falls right off me now. :)
  • Traciaq
    Traciaq Posts: 29
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    I am fairly new to my fitness pal also, I used weight watchers prior to landing here, Hit a rough plateau and made some changes.
    No one hates exercise like I do,I started walking slowly one mile 5 days a week overtime became 3 miles a day five days a week when I hit a plateau my fiance and I joined a gym and go 5-6 days a week. Do I love it? Not so much, but I do love how much better I feel and how much more energy I have and that becomes addicting. Just take it day by day, put yourself first, you cant be the best you unless you take care of yourself.
  • bethanycopley1980
    bethanycopley1980 Posts: 75 Member
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    YOU ARE NOT WEAK.

    FE = IRON
    MALE = MAN

    ...you are IRON MAN.


    Seriously.
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
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    Fear can be a good thing sometimes....unless/until it becomes anxiety, then it isn't so good.

    Losing it (to me anyway) has a LOT more to do with what you put in your body than what you do with your body. Consequently, I don't exercise much, and I've lost what I've lost doing so. However, I will say that when I started, I was lucky to get in 500 steps a day, and now I'm averaging 1500 to 2200 pretty easily. All about sitting less, moving more.

    Don't feel like you won't be successful if you don't spend 3 hours every night sweating profusely at a gym. It's all about taking steps in the right direction. Start by making sure you log EVERYTHING. Then, start focusing on drinking water. Then focus more on protein and fiber. However long you take between steps or modifying things is up to you and how comfortable you feel in "changing up the game a little". This is your journey. You decide if exercising makes you crazy, put it on the back burner. If you know your comfortable getting in 8 glasses of water a day, then try doing that. You're not in competing against anybody, not even yourself.

    I have 2 daughters, ages 7 and 10. They've started eating a lot better since both my husband and I are making efforts to do so, and we applaud them when they make good choices. I'm convinced my 7 year old is going to be a nutritionist. She doesn't eat fries or breadsticks "Because they aren't a healthy choice!" The kids will catch on.
  • rides4sanity
    rides4sanity Posts: 1,269 Member
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    Start off by eating what you normally do for a couple days. LOG EVERYTHING!! Even creamer in your coffee. You'll be amazed by how much you actually are consuming.

    Next, review those logs and see where you could have made a better choice. I had a real eye opener when I logged a Son of Baconator from Wendy's. WHEW!! No WONDER I got so big!!

    Then start upping your activity. Go for a 10 minute walk when you can throughout the day. Take the stairs instead of the elevator for a floor . . . then two . . . then three. :)

    Change is always scary. But once you start seeing the small results (and the big ones) you'll see why it's so worth it.

    As far as your calorie count goes, I always tell people to go the The Biggest Loser website and use their calorie calculator. You put in your age, weight, height, activity level . . . it gives you the amount to eat to MAINTAIN your weight. Then the standard is to eat 500 calories less per day than that to lose 1 lb. per week. Keep in mind that you should NOT starve yourself. You can't run a car with no gas.

    HANG IN THERE!! You'll do wonderfully as long as you focus on you for a change. My guess is it's been all about the kids till now. Boy do I understand! But you will feel so much better once you take the next step and start taking care of yourself!!

    This is a great place to start. You can't really change until you know where your starting point is. Chances are there is NO reason for you to go so low in calories. Don't give up. I've been on here for 2 years and am just now realizing that I'm not quite where I need to be calorie wise. How do I know? Because I feel bad. If we are doing this right, we should be satisfied and have enough energy to live our lives. Sure you will have days where you are hungry and tired, but they should be the exception not the norm. If it makes you miserable there is no way you will stick with it.
  • HoneydewLou
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    Baby steps! You don't need to starve to do this- in my opinion (and it's just an opinion) 1200 calories is way too little for anyone. People here eat 1700/1800 calories and lose lots of weight- they just make sure they are eating the right foods. Plenty of whole foods like brown pasta, rice, sweet potatoes, fruit etc etc. You have to find a plan that works for you. Think about what foods you like. Start to try and make healthier options of them. So instead of a beef chili with cheese, have a vegetable chili with brown rice. You know what I mean? These little changes will keep you feeling satiated and are sustainable. You don't have to eat salads every day, just look up healthier alternatives to your recipes online.

    Same with exercise. A little a day. People fall off the wagon when they try and make changes too quickly. Add a walk in everyday, just a 20 minute one, and see how you go.
  • swiftiesbuddies
    swiftiesbuddies Posts: 14 Member
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    New gal its dead simple, lose 1 pound, and celebrate, Then lose the next one and celebrate each time you lose a pound give yourself a little reward. If you fall off the diet, don't beat yourself up, just get right back in the next day.

    What to eat.........................everything on MFP just less of it, If you fancy a MacD's just count the calories into your meal plan.

    Above walk, go upstairs to bed but come down for a cup of tea, again and again and again,

    Forget gyms the stairs in your own house are the future .............go up and down 10 times a day, for the first week,

    15 times a day for the 2nd week, and so on ....................................

    at the end of week 2 come on tell us you've lost 5lbs and we will celebrate with you ...................all of us :)
  • becs3578
    becs3578 Posts: 836 Member
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    If I am being honest... I find 1200 hard to stick with and I find I want to cheat more because I get hungry. I am now exercise every day (except saturday) and I "eat back some of my calories" but always try to be below my NET CALORIES for the day... I also changed my target to 1300 calories a day. MFP seems to like to put people at 1200. I just didn't think that worked for me.

    Just an idea.. and I don't really know what I am talking about.. but perhaps you start with 1500 a day and add a form of exercise as well. Eventually (maybe a month or so later) lower it by 100 calories to 1400... and so on as you lose weight. I saw someone on here suggest C25k (couch to a 5k)... it is just that. It takes you from "I can't do anything and I am part of my couch" to "I can jog for 30 mins straight".. I know because I started with that program about 5 years ago... and went back to it several times after I fell back into my "bad" ways... It was always a great way to get back into being active.

    When I really finally decided to make my health priority, I add crossfit to the equation. For me that was the turning point. Everyone has there own thing that really gets them going. And now I can run 9 miles (attempting 10 on sunday)... and I am 9 lbs way from my goal of losing 50 total. These last 10 are a "B" and don't want to come off but I am in it for the long haul. I joined MFP to help me continue on this journey and I hope it will help you as well.

    I will also send you a friend request. I spent most of my life.... unhappy, depressed, overweight and not living up to my potential. I finally started LIVING my life and not just letting in happen in my 34 year. PLanning on 35 to be the best year yet!!!!!

    You have taken the first step. CONGRATS... now it is time to take the next! We are all here for you.
  • Lizplus3
    Lizplus3 Posts: 53 Member
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    You have made a step in the correct direction by even getting started on here. I have gone on this path twice now - it is not always easy to do but it is for your health and for your LIFE. You can do this - just take it slow and steady. My suggestion (since I have been back on here for almost two months so I still remember how hard the first two weeks were) is that you set your goal to lose 1 lb. a week and let MFP tell you how many calories you should take in. This will (more than likely) be more than 1200, the first two weeks are the hardest because you are taking a close look at all that you are putting into your body and really seeing how many calories you are taking in each day. The loss of sugar for your body is going to make you feel hungry - a lot. I ate lots of popcorn the first two weeks, and then the need for sugar went away almost totally. You should not fear exercise - it isn't a big ugly monster - I promise. Since you have said that you see your daughter following in your steps take her for a walk around the block. This is exercise and it can be a joint event that could be fun. When the block becomes too "easy" add a second block to the walk. All of this extra movement will burn calories and you will feel so much better.

    You can do this!!!!
  • Christinelmt78
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    It's always a challenge to change, we all get comfortable in our lives and what we know.. When I wanted to lose weight a few years back ( went back to school full time and gained 10 lbs) I had no clue or desire to count calories but was always aware of what I ate.. I never portioned out my food, so when I put myself on a calorie "budget" I found it easier as the time went on to choose better choices.. For example let's say I had a 150 calorie snack well instead of 3 cookies that won't do me any good as far as filling me up, I went for a Greek yogurt with protein that will hold me over until my next meal.. It's just a little thinking and choosing food in that mind frame.. For breakfast to stick in my calories instead of 2 full eggs for 140 calories I would eat 3 egg whites for 50 calories.. It's just choosing foods that will give you more bang for buck.. Hope this helps and you can do this!!! These forums are packed full of information ( I log onto this site every chance I get, and I'm learning a lot every day ) and support..
  • Christinelmt78
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    New gal its dead simple, lose 1 pound, and celebrate, Then lose the next one and celebrate each time you lose a pound give yourself a little reward. If you fall off the diet, don't beat yourself up, just get right back in the next day.

    What to eat.........................everything on MFP just less of it, If you fancy a MacD's just count the calories into your meal plan.

    Above walk, go upstairs to bed but come down for a cup of tea, again and again and again,

    Forget gyms the stairs in your own house are the future .............go up and down 10 times a day, for the first week,

    15 times a day for the 2nd week, and so on ....................................

    at the end of week 2 come on tell us you've lost 5lbs and we will celebrate with you ...................all of us :)
  • Christinelmt78
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    I love this, you don't need a gym and the stairs can do wonders .. If I have loads of laundry I do find myself taking one load at a time just so I can go up the stairs more
  • gabbymom2
    gabbymom2 Posts: 175 Member
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    Hi.
    So is scared what you are feeling or do you want people to feel bad for you?
    YOU need to take control of this. Little steps.....plan, plan and plan! The
    easiest exercise to start is walking. Try it.....maybe for 5 minutes....then
    add a minute the next day. Or while you in bed watching TV do some
    sit ups or grab some light weights. Also do not eat so late if you can
    help it. The 1200 probably is low for you....just don' t give up. There
    are always people here to talk to.