So my BF wants to go on a diet...

superfox12082

My boyfriend told me last night that I should research diets for him to go on. He is 5'11" about 220 pounds. The doctor says he should be at 190, but 200 would be good. I told him that he needs to eat less food and eat more than one time a day. Currently he gets up, goes to work for 8 hours, comes home and goes to the neighbors for a few beers. Quantities vary. I usually make a homemade dinner for us. He will eat it all (minus my portion). Hardly ever any leftovers unless he doesn't like something. Then he will move on to dessert. Cake, pie, cereal. Ice cream is the big one because we don't always have cake or pie on hand and he buys his own ice cream. Usually he is still hungry and will have toast with peanut butter or whatever he can find that sounds good.

Any ideas on how I can get him to realize he should eat more than once a day and he doesn't have to stuff himself like a Thanksgiving turkey every time he does eat? He has brought up this "diet" thing more than once, so I believe he is serious. And please, don't tell me to cut out the beer because I already know that is something he is not willing to give up. Thanks for any ideas. :flowerforyou:

Francl27

It's fine to only eat once a day if it's what he likes. But he has to eat less (does he really have beers without eating anything for almost 24 hours? Yikes).

I'd just start by helping him set up an account and log his food, just to have an idea of how much he's eating (and drinking).

mamahannick

I'd just start by helping him set up an account and log his food, just to have an idea of how much he's eating (and drinking).

This.

Lizzy622

He really needs to find his own way. My husband tried MFP but didn't like the time it took to track. He is now doing WW and likes it better because "points are easier to count than calories". We all need to find what works for us, you can only make some suggestions.

JoRocka

It's fine to only eat once a day if it's what he likes. But he has to eat less (does he really have beers without eating anything for almost 24 hours? Yikes).

I'd just start by helping him set up an account and log his food, just to have an idea of how much he's eating (and drinking).

bolded

he's a grown *kitten* man- he should do his own research and figure out what he is eating on his own.

help him get started but you shouldn't be baby sitting him.

meritage4

How about you stepping out of the middle. Otherwise everything will always be your fault.
Let him research diets. Let him choose one. Let him decide to eat more than once a day.

Seriously-you are not his mama-let BF be in charge of himself

tegalicious

show previous quotes

It's fine to only eat once a day if it's what he likes. But he has to eat less (does he really have beers without eating anything for almost 24 hours? Yikes).

I'd just start by helping him set up an account and log his food, just to have an idea of how much he's eating (and drinking).

bolded

he's a grown *kitten* man- he should do his own research and figure out what he is eating on his own.

help him get started but you shouldn't be baby sitting him.

Yup!

tigersword

Why does he have to eat more than once a day?

lilacmeddow

I ve a job where I get up at BS O'clock in the morning too... it sucks. Anyways I always try to make something that "grab and go" for the morning. Boiled eggs and pre cut fruit are staples for me. When I'm feeling ambitious I make a healthy version of Crepes which I use egg white, tapioca starch and coconut oil in place of whole eggs flour and butter... although I will say they taste better the old fashioned way. Mine are still good but you know how it is.

About the beer... He doesn't have to stop. Lets face it if you take away something you love you just set yourself up for failure in the future. Let him still have it but maybe switch to a light beer... or even a cider. I'm in LOOOOVE with hard Ciders and they are starting to become a little more main stream at bars these days.

Oh and Check out the Paleo Diet. Talking him into eating like a caveman may go over better than "Here's a diet soda.... good luck" :-P

I hope at least some of this is helpful

:-D

linkirving

Have him set up an MFP account. MFP makes losing weight mindless(not effortless).

kill3rtofu

start by cutting back or eliminating beer and desert

lauren3101

There's nothing wrong with him eating once a day, if it's what he likes, but he just has to be mindful of his portion control. It's something that he needs to do himself though. Encourage him, help him and support him, but make him accountable.

Get him to set up an account on here and just log for a week or two, just to see what he's consuming. Then work out a calorie amount - 20lb to lose is not huge. He could do 0.5 - 1lb a week. Then see where things can be changed. Could he switch to sorbet rather than ice cream, for example? Could you bulk up his dinner with more veg, or even better, more protein so he stays fuller?

Also, you say he quite bluntly is not willing to give up the beer - well, he's going to have to make some changes if he wants results. A pint of beer can be around 200 cals, so if he's drinking 5 a night, he could be racking up 1000 cals before he's even eaten anything. Could he not switch to spirits, or lower calorie beers, or less beers?

mamahannick

And yeah if he's serious about it, he needs to step up and do it himself. You can't baby him through dieting and exercising. He's a big boy, he can do it himself if he really wants to.

elghee123

IF you live together then start cleaning up the KITCHEN cupboard. I did it by pace by pace. I used to buy soda by bulk then on my next shopping I bought half then little by little I was able to ditch soda. Next thing, sweets but I replaced it with dried fruits - raisin is a good example.

I also minded what I am cooking, I started preparing food which has more veggies and less tasty (I meant not too salty and all). When I do meat, I boil and then ditch the water then replace it with new hot water. It's like removing or less oil from the meat. I used to cook more than enough, now I only cook just enough.

Do baby steps when changing the usual routine.

ironanimal

Meal timing and quantity are irrelevant. His biggest hurdle is gonna be giving up some of the beer - he needs to realise they do contribute to weight gain. Get him to track an average day with the higher end # of beers he has in a day.

superfox12082

How about you stepping out of the middle. Otherwise everything will always be your fault.
Let him research diets. Let him choose one. Let him decide to eat more than once a day.

Seriously-you are not his mama-let BF be in charge of himself

Good point!

emilyisbonkers

I would support him but dont try to control it, or guide him completely
just leads to resentment if it goes wrong or doesnt work

IronPlayground

I think there are some really good replies already.

The only thing I can think of to open his eyes to set up the MFP account and track his food and beer consumption as it is now. This way he will have proof that something has to go or be reduced.

I don't think eating once a day is a problem. Nor do I think the beer and dessert is a problem. The problem is the amounts.

Give him the tools, but don't do it for him.

tigersword

I ve a job where I get up at BS O'clock in the morning too... it sucks. Anyways I always try to make something that "grab and go" for the morning. Boiled eggs and pre cut fruit are staples for me. When I'm feeling ambitious I make a healthy version of Crepes which I use egg white, tapioca starch and coconut oil in place of whole eggs flour and butter... although I will say they taste better the old fashioned way. Mine are still good but you know how it is.

About the beer... He doesn't have to stop. Lets face it if you take away something you love you just set yourself up for failure in the future. Let him still have it but maybe switch to a light beer... or even a cider. I'm in LOOOOVE with hard Ciders and they are starting to become a little more main stream at bars these days.

Oh and Check out the Paleo Diet. Talking him into eating like a caveman may go over better than "Here's a diet soda.... good luck" :-P

I hope at least some of this is helpful

:-D

The paleo diet has nothing to do with eating like a caveman. Cavemen ate grass and roots, with the occasional berry, and once in a while a random animal they could scavenge or kill.

superfox12082

I think there are some really good replies already.

The only thing I can think of to open his eyes to set up the MFP account and track his food and beer consumption as it is now. This way he will have proof that something has to go or be reduced.

I don't think eating once a day is a problem. Nor do I think the beer and dessert is a problem. The problem is the amounts.

Give him the tools, but don't do it for him.

Good ideas. Thanks!

Chief_Rocka

he shouldn't be eating carbs past 6pm

JoRocka

he shouldn't be eating carbs past 6pm

really? why. any particularly good reason outside of media mumbo jumbo?

Meal timing is irrelevant and unless you are really getting dialed in on diets- carb/protein stuff is largely irrelevant to what's going on in your body. When you start getting down to teens and single digits and hard core cutting it matters- but for most people- it's a complete none issue.

farfromthetree

show previous quotes

It's fine to only eat once a day if it's what he likes. But he has to eat less (does he really have beers without eating anything for almost 24 hours? Yikes).

I'd just start by helping him set up an account and log his food, just to have an idea of how much he's eating (and drinking).

bolded

he's a grown *kitten* man- he should do his own research and figure out what he is eating on his own.

help him get started but you shouldn't be baby sitting him.

Yes!!! He is not ready to be committed if he will not do the research on his own!!