Trouble Mentally Accepting Weight Loss?

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AnxiousPenman
AnxiousPenman Posts: 71 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
This might be kind of a weird question/topic, so I want to phrase it as accurately as possible.

Does anyone here have trouble accepting the way they look when they lose weight?

In 2007, I lost 70lbs. I went from being 250 to 180 ... under 200lbs for the first time in my adult life. Most of the time, when I looked in the mirror, or saw pictures of me, it was very difficult for me to emotionally accept what I was seeing. I felt like I didn't know who this thin guy was. He looked so different than the vision I had of myself (of this 250 fat guy) ... it all felt so foreign.

A big part of me feels like that is one of the reasons I ended up gaining all of the weight back. When I look at myself now, back at 250, I know who that is ... that's me. I look in the mirror and I see myself--I see the person I always was, except for the brief period when I was someone else.

I remember being 180 and people constantly asking me how it felt to lose so much weight ... or how I felt about myself ... and, on the outside, I'd always be sunny and "Oh, feels great! Whole new me! It's awesome!" ... but on the inside, I'd feel really torn, again, because I'd look at myself in the mirror and see something so drastically different that I didn't know how to come to terms with it.

Does that make sense? Did anyone else that lost a significant amount of weight ever feel that way?

I'm on a new journey now to re-lose that 70lbs. But, I have to admit, there's a part of my brain that worries that my weight is always going to be in flux, because I think the "fat me" is the *real* me ... and "skinny me" was someone else, that I just couldn't identify with.

--
AP

Replies

  • WBB55
    WBB55 Posts: 4,131 Member
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    You're not alone. I'd say it took me three years to recognize the person in the mirror as 'me.'

    I still pull extra large clothing off the shelf and go 'yeah that's my size' then stare in the mirror in the dressing room dumbfounded that they don't fit.

    I hear the same thing happens when you age and there's a wrinkly person looking back at you in the mirror.

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