i binge like crazy...HELP

annazhang96343

so after weight loss during the summer I joined myfitnesspal and 2 months with 3 pounds lost and 3 months of plateau I gave up on trying to move the scale. Don't get me wrong, I still workout and eat right and all that. I guess my body wants to maintain a certain weight(my waist and everything got smaller in that three month period ), but really in the back of my mind I still want to move the scale but the thinking part says that it wants to maintain or just plain eat. I go through this cycle of eating 1200 calories and then a trigger ( today because I ate processed food and went on a 4000 calori e binge) and I practically ate all my hard work away then I felt guilty( I am a recovering Bulimic btw and the therapy cost a lot of money so I don't want to put my parents through that again but then again I am afraid of getting fat again..) I did the same thing last week( but I didn't relapse), I know I probably won't gain weight and sometimes i'll tell myself a pound is nothing but in the end I always end up where I started ..How do I stop ...?