Bariatric Surgery Question

kerrid72

I would like your opinions on talking to someone about bariatric surgery. My initial thoughts on it are that it should be avoided if you are physically able to get up and move and eat less. I don't think it is a decision that should be made lightly or just for a 100 lbs or less. However, my mother has been struggling with her weight for as long as I can remember and I would guess that she is now around 400 lbs. She has always said she didn't want surgery but she isn't doing anything on her own successfully and is having considerable trouble getting around now. My brother and I are thinking about talking to her about the surgical option. She's 66 years old and I believe Medicare would cover it. I guess I'm asking your opinion as far as is it a good idea to encourage someone else to have surgery and also do you all think it is worth the risk?

arsail

I'm 58 and had the roux en y surgery in January. I've gained and lost 100 lbs probably 5 times, struggled by entire life with my weight. I'm very happy I had it done, at least so far.

klyn7788

I have a family member undergo surgery about three years ago (she was probably about 55 when she had the surgery). I have no idea how much weight she lost, although it is well over 100lbs - maybe close to 200. She has always refused to learn how to eat properly or exercise and this probably saved her life.

On the other hand, there have been some complications with her intestinal track which generally cause uncontrollable and very stinky gas. It unfortunately impacted some of her personal relationships and her career (a long story that is not at all relevant here).

meltedsno

I would like your opinions on talking to someone about bariatric surgery. My initial thoughts on it are that it should be avoided if you are physically able to get up and move and eat less. I don't think it is a decision that should be made lightly or just for a 100 lbs or less. However, my mother has been struggling with her weight for as long as I can remember and I would guess that she is now around 400 lbs. She has always said she didn't want surgery but she isn't doing anything on her own successfully and is having considerable trouble getting around now. My brother and I are thinking about talking to her about the surgical option. She's 66 years old and I believe Medicare would cover it. I guess I'm asking your opinion as far as is it a good idea to encourage someone else to have surgery and also do you all think it is worth the risk?

So you think that having surgery is the answer to your mother's weight issue? You do realize that bariatric surgery is NOT a cure for her weight issue....it is a tool to aid in losing weight. Unless she changes her eating habits surgery isn't going to do her a bit of good. The risks involved far outweigh what she could do on her own if she set her mind to it. I have two relatives (father and daughter) who thought this was going to be an easy way out for them... well, he ended up spending a total of 11 months out of the first 18 months in intensive care because of a botched up surgery. He has since had to have surgery to repair the damage that was done. Physically, he aged 20 years and his health has suffered. PLUS he has NEVER learned to control his eating. He continues to eat tons of food... junk food... huge amounts of food... doesn't gain anything since his body doesn't absorb any nutrition. He is on tons of medication and believe me, the stench from the gas he lets out can clear a football field of people. The daughter??? well, she has gained back all the weight she lost plus an additional 75 lbs.... she never learned to eat properly either. it's all about behavior modification... if you aren't going to change the way you eat, there isn't any surgery in the world that will be successful...

if your mother was willing to change her eating habits, which is what she would need to do for the surgery to be successful...she wouldn't need the surgery in the first place!!!

For what it is worth... I've lost over half my body weight ON MY OWN... all because I made the decision to change my life... not because someone told me I should have surgery. Instead of approaching her about having surgery...how about helping her eat better? How about getting her started with simple body movements, working up to walking a block a day, then two blocks...it's not going to be easy... but she's going to have to learn to do this anyway if you think surgery is going to take care of her weight issues...

mallory5385

My mom has just had the surgery done a month ago. Before surgery they asked her to lose as much weight as she could and she lost about 25 pounds. She has now lost another 25 pounds. She's able to walk longer distances now and is much happier. With the surgery you need to follow the diet though. But if she's not losing weight on her own I think it's a good choice for her. She will learn how to eat better with the doctor's instructions and if she doesn't especially in the beginning she wont be able to keep the food down (that is what happened to other people we know that tried eating candy and such). Before she even gets considered to have the surgery she has to go to group counseling with other people that want to get the surgery done too and lots of tests. She'll have to dedicate herself to it and want to change. I hope my advice helps you a little bit.

kmaxwell0928

I had the lap band done in 2011. I know that it is very successful for a lot of people, but for me, I never had the dramatic results. I have only lost about 60 pounds in the past 3 years, which is something that I could have easily done on my own without having a foreign object placed inside my stomach.
Unfortunately, it took having surgery to realize that you can nip, slice, tuck, constrict and band your body up, but it won't fix what is going on in your head, and until you have that magical "AH-HA" moment, you will continue the weight loss struggle no matter what you do.
For a lot of people, doing that in-depth soul searching is way more daunting than forcing yourself to get on the treadmill or to choose that carrot over the cookie, but it is necessary if you are going to acheive permanent and long-lasting results.
Obesity is just a symptom of something else going on inside of us. It is never about the food. For me, THIS has been my biggest obstacle, and I am still looking for that moment when it finally connects for me.

Iknowsaur

Having surgery alone isn't going to fix her problem with her weight.
It can be a very helpful tool to initially lose weight quickly if there are health concerns, but learning to eat properly is just as important with the surgery as it is without it.
It is 100% possible to stretch out the pouch created by weight loss surgery (VSG or Bypass) back to (or close to) the size of the original stomach by continuing to overeat.
Nutrition is also far more important after surgery than before, because of limit calorie/food quantities and malabsorption (at least for the bypass.)
Just something to think about. I'm not anti-surgery in any way.

CyberEd312

If the person is not ready to commit to the process of making this a lifestyle change and getting to the root of their problems as to why they weigh 400+ lbs. then no surgery is ever going to be successful. Surgery isn't the end all be all, it can be used as a tool but it surely won't solve the problem... I have no issue with those that want the surgery to help aide them but for me I knew from day one when I weighed 560 lbs. that no surgery was going to help if I didn't fix what was broken in my head that aloud me to get to the size I was... So I committed to the process and have spent the last 5 years in therapy both mental and physical to get to the bottom of my issues and work my way back.... My family could preach to me (and did for the better half of a decade) for hours on end but until I was ready to make the change, they might as well of been speaking to the wall..... Best of Luck

Amelia7779

I've known several people who had the surgery and saw many more during the course of my (dietetic) internship. In my experience (and research backs this up), the people who are successful are those who are extremely motivated, and were able to start losing a bit of weight on their own prior to surgery.

Gastric bypass is a very serious surgery, both in terms of the actual surgery and the long term effects. People who have it must take supplements for the rest of their life, be extremely careful about what and when they eat and drink fluids, and be careful not to stretch out the pouch (which can definitely happen). And pretty much never drink alcohol again. It is a good option for many people, but it takes a very dedicated individual...only you can say whether your mother is that person. But it definitely is something she would have to be committed to on her own.

SharonNehring

I can't begin to tell you the number of times I've seen people who decided eating pizza or French fries a couple of weeks after surgery was a good idea, only to end up with an obstruction that has to be removed. If a person is not willing to dedicate themselves to the process it can be a disaster.

Bariatric surgery can be a wonderful tool, and when it goes well, has fantastic outcomes. But when it goes wrong, it's typically not a minor problem but a catastrophe. As much as you want a healthier life for her, she has to want it for herself in order to take the risk.

czechwolf52

I would get her into some health education classes, such as nutrition, healthy living, exercise, etc., and into some counseling to get to the root of her problem. If she doesn't receive some proper education and understand why she is struggling with her weight then ultimately surgery won't help her. As for the surgery, talk to a few different doctors/surgeons to get their opinion, and also see what your mom feels comfortable with. Personally I would want to recommend the lap band because of her age. Gastric bypass is a major surgery and people have to be very careful with their diet afterwards and keep up on their supplements. She may not be physically/mentally able to handle major surgery right now. I don't know your mother's medical history and health status (and the little pesky fact that I'm not a doctor) but this has been my $.02.

kerrid72

Thank you all for your opinions. I know that this is a life change and not a quick fix. I know she needs some counseling to go along with this and that it is not THE answer to solve everything. I've encouraged her to try weight watchers (she doesn't like being around people) and suggested online videos that show "chair exercises" since she has so much trouble walking. She bought a jawbone and decided she was going to lose enough weight to fit in the chairs at my daughter's 8th grade promotion. She still wears her jawbone but has not done much more than that.

I know that my brother & I can not make her do something she doesn't want to. It's just so hard to know that she is missing out on so much of her retirement years. I don't think it's that she doesn't WANT to... I think it has gotten to the point that it is so overwhelming. That is why the surgery thought has crossed our minds.

Again, thanks for your opinions!

ZombieEarhart

Wow, this is tough. I think a concern might be that if you essentially talk her into it, she's still going to have to do all the hard work of maintaining her weight loss while keeping herself healthy after surgery. The post-op life is no joke.