Looking for friends (advice?) (Warning for ED Content)

alcrisp93

Hello!

My name is Amanda, and I'm currently in recovery from an eating disorder.

I've come a long way since the height of my disorder, but there's still weight that I'd like to lose. I joined this site with hopes that I'd be able to find a healthier, more maintainable option for weight loss while still being able to track my goals/food intake. My girlfriend tends to object pretty vehemently when I mention plans for weight loss at all, saying things like, "Wanting to lose weight is not bad, but the way you go about it is." and "If you keep setting goals like this, I'm afraid you won't be able to get better and love yourself and let go of the idea that 'fat' is the worst thing you could ever be."

Obviously, those are ideas that I'm kind of struggling with. I want to find a way to love myself unconditionally- in a way that is not dependent on the numbers on my scale/the way my jeans currently fit. I'd also like to lose weight. Are these goals that can be achieved together? Or do I have to find first one, then the other?

All of that said (and you can even feel free to ignore most of it) I'm looking for friends who, if they're not in quite the same boat as me, are at least not huge proponents of fad diets/diet culture. I'm looking to avoid the major toxicity that's inherent there. No 1,200 calories a day types of things, no phenphen, no miracle fast-purge dieters. Content like that can be hugely triggering for me (which is why I avoid the forums here most of the time). I'm interested in finding friends who are interested in self love, self care, and safe, healthy weight loss. (Other people in recovery would also be nice, but I don't know how many of us there are on mfp).