Ex- GF Facebook

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  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
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    If that's motivation to get in shape...USE IT!! Who cares if nothing is ever going to come of it....use it to lose the weight and get healthy. And then ask her to lunch!

    I live 2500 miles from home now and I'm married, and about 2-3 months before I go back home I am primping and dieting like crazy! I have some old high school friends, ex-boyfriends, and other friends who don't see me often, except a few "selfies", so I want to look my best. If anything, I want to show people how well I'm doing....for me personally "Look how fat I've gotten" doesn't say "I'm happy, I'm successful, and look what you're missing out on".

    Exactly, I want to use it as motivation and maybe ask her to lunch if and ONLY IF I meet my goal.
  • broox80
    broox80 Posts: 1,195 Member
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    I will take the motivation where I can get it!!!! I invent scenarios in my head for motivation if I am lacking on real motivation, so hey..........run with it!!!! Just remember along the way that you are doing this for you and you will be the one ultimately benefiting from the rewards of your new lifestyle. In the end, you may just not even need her motivation any more because YOU are the awesome one!!!!
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
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    This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol

    Thanks!

    Please don't let anything this person posted have any bearing on your marriage. There's absolutely no connection. Just because this guy wants to lose weight for an ex doesn't mean your husband does.

    :noway:

    honey....we be crazy....you know this. Girls are CRAZY and we go down these rabbit holes.
  • Broderick50
    Broderick50 Posts: 851 Member
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    I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.
  • Loss4TheWin
    Loss4TheWin Posts: 249
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    This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol

    Thanks!

    Please don't let anything this person posted have any bearing on your marriage. There's absolutely no connection. Just because this guy wants to lose weight for an ex doesn't mean your husband does.

    :noway:

    honey....we be crazy....you know this. Girls are CRAZY and we go down these rabbit holes.


    ...This. And, if it helps drive me, I don't see a problem with it. It's not like I'm going to start grilling my husband on his FB friend's list because of this post :laugh:

    Besides, how do you know I'm NOT his wife...? lol
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    How does your wife feel about you using an ex for motivation?
  • breeshabebe
    breeshabebe Posts: 580
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    I will take the motivation where I can get it!!!! I invent scenarios in my head for motivation if I am lacking on real motivation, so hey..........run with it!!!! Just remember along the way that you are doing this for you and you will be the one ultimately benefiting from the rewards of your new lifestyle. In the end, you may just not even need her motivation any more because YOU are the awesome one!!!!

    I so do the same thing! Normally these scenarios involve me walking into the room with my hair blowing and Louis Louis playing while I walk. LOL

    OP, use whatever you want to. I'd be a liar if I didn't say that Ex's and current crushes don't motivate me to work harder.
  • leadslinger17
    leadslinger17 Posts: 297 Member
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    PS - we broke up b/c I was a stupid college guy who couldn't keep in my pants

    lol, if that is the case have you considered maybe she has been wanting to rub it in your face all these years and has decided now is the time? Sounds like it has worked.
  • nancybuss
    nancybuss Posts: 1,461 Member
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    Good luck!!!!!! Good Bye Pounds!
  • jilliangetsit
    jilliangetsit Posts: 97 Member
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    Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her! :wink:

    :)
  • breeshabebe
    breeshabebe Posts: 580
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    PS - we broke up b/c I was a stupid college guy who couldn't keep in my pants

    lol, if that is the case have you considered maybe she has been wanting to rub it in your face all these years and has decided now is the time? Sounds like it has worked.

    This could also be true. Also, I can admit that I love it when my ex's/ex- crushes gain weight/ look worse with age. I'm sure that makes me a terrible person.
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
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    Otay.
  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
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    I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.

    I am worried about this. We have exchanged a couple small messages via FB. I told myself I would send another one after meeting my next weight goal, which I achieved today and if I make my final goal I will ask her to lunch. I am worried she will tell me to stop messaging on FB and there goes my motivation.
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
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    This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol

    Thanks!
    People are insane.
    :noway:
  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
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    I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.

    I am worried about this. We have exchanged a couple small messages via FB. I told myself I would send another one after meeting my next weight goal, which I achieved today and if I make my final goal I will ask her to lunch. I am worried she will tell me to stop messaging on FB and there goes my motivation.

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any reconnection would be for closure and my own mental therapy. I am not leaving my wife and kids for a college love.

    Again, Raymond, the question...


    what do you plan to tell your wife?


    (as I try to get myself out of my own little jam)

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any minor reconnection is for closure and my own mental therapy.
  • breeshabebe
    breeshabebe Posts: 580
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    Um... just caught on to the fact that you have a wife. Sorry, but I think that's kinda messed up. I'm sure it's not something you would share with your wife or something that she would be happy with.
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
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    I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.

    I am worried about this. We have exchanged a couple small messages via FB. I told myself I would send another one after meeting my next weight goal, which I achieved today and if I make my final goal I will ask her to lunch. I am worried she will tell me to stop messaging on FB and there goes my motivation.

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any reconnection would be for closure and my own mental therapy. I am not leaving my wife and kids for a college love.

    Again, Raymond, the question...


    what do you plan to tell your wife?


    (as I try to get myself out of my own little jam)

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any minor reconnection is for closure and my own mental therapy.

    some people would argue that an emotional affair is as damaging as a physical one...

    the amount of emotional power you have given this woman in determining how you change your life and better your life for her and not for your wife...

    well that could be defined as an emotional affair...

    especially since you have decided your wife doesn't need to know.....that's a sign of you knowing that you are doing something "wrong"

    so....again....

    you said it went badly because you couldn't keep your pecker in your pants...


    what in gods name has really changed about you?

    really?

    what has changed?
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.

    I am worried about this. We have exchanged a couple small messages via FB. I told myself I would send another one after meeting my next weight goal, which I achieved today and if I make my final goal I will ask her to lunch. I am worried she will tell me to stop messaging on FB and there goes my motivation.

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any reconnection would be for closure and my own mental therapy. I am not leaving my wife and kids for a college love.

    Again, Raymond, the question...


    what do you plan to tell your wife?


    (as I try to get myself out of my own little jam)

    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any minor reconnection is for closure and my own mental therapy.
    I think that is a huge mistake. But it's your marriage ...
  • nomeejerome
    nomeejerome Posts: 2,616 Member
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    She wouldn't know. It is a long story and any minor reconnection is for closure and my own mental therapy.

    :huh:

    The closure should of happened before you decided to get married OP.

    This might not end well for you.....the minor reconnection with your ex-girlfriend and/or your marriage.
  • misschoppo
    misschoppo Posts: 463 Member
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    I bet once you start losing, that will be come less and less of a motivator, and you will simply enjoy being healthy. Good luck!!

    I agree with this...if it motivates you in the short term then great, but really this is something you need to be doing for yourself as if your motivation is for someone else and not yourself you may just give up and feel like not trying anymore if reconnecting with her does not work out. I would concentrate less on your ex and more on doing this because you want to do it to be healthy and happy within yourself.

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