Weight Loss Jealousy?

xxtaliaxx

So I've been doing a lot better with consistency with nutrition and exercising and I'm happy that I have been losing weight slowly and gaining muscle definition. But I have a friend who has lost a lot of weight recently. Like, more than 2 pounds per week weight loss. It's been 12ish weeks since I started this and I've only lost about 8-9 pounds while shes lost 15-20. I'm really happy for her but I can't help but notice every time I talk to her she has to mention how much weight she's lost. There is nothing wrong with being proud of it and wanting people to know but I kind of feel like she's doing it on purpose to get me jealous. I'm already a jealous person and she knows my goals and how slow my weight loss journey has been. I understand why I haven't lost as much as her (I focused more on weight lifting and some cardio while she focused on lots of cardio and light light lifting). She mentions how she doesn't need a personal trainer (I have one) because she can lose the weight herself and how her clothes are getting big and how she has to buy a whole new wardrobe (mind you, this happens pretty much every time we talk) and she'll go on and on. I don't know if it's because she has more confidence than me or if I'm over-analyzing but it's really starting to take a toll on my motivation and goals. I want to lose weight too but I must admit to myself I look damn good for only losing 8-9 pounds. But it seems to always go back to the number on the scale. Am I crazy for thinking that she's trying to make me jealous?

lemur_lady

If she is bigger than you then the weight will come off more easily anyway.

If she is the same size as you or there abouts then maybe she is losing lean muscle along with the fat. You can be happy in the knowledge that you are doing this the healthier way and will end up looking a lot better for it.

lisaanne1369

Jealousy is a sin.

DebbieLyn63

So I've been doing a lot better with consistency with nutrition and exercising and I'm happy that I have been losing weight slowly and gaining muscle definition. But I have a friend who has lost a lot of weight recently. Like, more than 2 pounds per week weight loss. It's been 12ish weeks since I started this and I've only lost about 8-9 pounds while shes lost 15-20. I'm really happy for her but I can't help but notice every time I talk to her she has to mention how much weight she's lost. There is nothing wrong with being proud of it and wanting people to know but I kind of feel like she's doing it on purpose to get me jealous. I'm already a jealous person and she knows my goals and how slow my weight loss journey has been. I understand why I haven't lost as much as her (I focused more on weight lifting and some cardio while she focused on lots of cardio and light light lifting). She mentions how she doesn't need a personal trainer (I have one) because she can lose the weight herself and how her clothes are getting big and how she has to buy a whole new wardrobe (mind you, this happens pretty much every time we talk) and she'll go on and on. I don't know if it's because she has more confidence than me or if I'm over-analyzing but it's really starting to take a toll on my motivation and goals. I want to lose weight too but I must admit to myself I look damn good for only losing 8-9 pounds. But it seems to always go back to the number on the scale. Am I crazy for thinking that she's trying to make me jealous?

Sounds like the problem is more you than her. Of course she is proud of her success and wants to talk about it all the time. Especially since you are losing weight as well. You are kindred spirits in that sense, and it is easier for her to share her successes with you than with someone who is overweight and not doing anything about it.

Perhaps she is competing a bit with you as part of her motivation. That's ok too. Just be happy for both of you and be confident that you are losing in a way that is healthy for YOU, and try not to compare your numbers on the scale with her numbers. She will slow down at some point. Plus it isn't that big of a difference between your numbers at this point.

If you already know that you are the 'jealous type' then I would suggest working on that aspect of your personality, to save you a lot of heartbreak and stress in the future. Relax and enjoy having someone to share this challenge with.

DebbieLyn63

I also see that you have already lost 25 lbs. Good for you! If your friend has not lost a lot of weight before you started this time, then that is why she is losing faster right now. It will even out soon.

missdibs1

This is not a competition. Body comp is more important than "weight". Perhaps she is losing water weight? Perhaps she has more to lose?

Set your own goals and achieve them. make yourself feel good inside.

40andFindingFitness

You know, a few months back I would have said no, but recently a couple of people have been acting a fool. A few coworkers and I have been trying to get fit(ter) and one is doing a fabulous job. She is down to a size six in pants and I couldn't be happier for her. Another is top-heavy and having issues and makes semi-snide comments about the first one. I keep interjecting that she has been working out for years and looks fabulous in my opinion.

Coworker #2 has also made a few snippy comments about how I seem to be losing faster and asked if I was taking supplements. I told her no, I just started adding weights and doing more strength training that I was a few months ago and even went down another pants size this month (not even close to a six by the way). Then I mentioned that I was looking into getting a barbell and some weights and you would have thought I said I was stealing her first born. OMG she was like, "You don't need a barbell! You're going to hurt yourself. You can tone and get muscles with a 3 lb weight. You should do low weights and high reps. What? You want to start doing high weights and low reps? OMG that's not right at all! I heard... blah blah blah," and so on it went.

I mean a full on rant. I have now learned to keep my mouth shut with that one. Just watch me melt 'cause I can't take anymore rants about how I choose to work on MY fitness journey. See, she ticked me off so bad that I'm on my own rant now. LOL

Eric_DeCastro

hang in there remember YOU are your only competition. and have a FINE NAVY day shipmate.

CrystalReaves78

Slow and steady wins the race.

howekaren

OMG she was like, "You don't need a barbell! You're going to hurt yourself. You can tone and get muscles with a 3 lb weight. You should do low weights and high reps. What? You want to start doing high weights and low reps? OMG that's not right at all! I heard... blah blah blah," and so on it went.

Unless she looks like a fitness competitor, I wouldn't be taking advice from her. Weights are good for women: prevents a host of problems as we get older including osteoporosis. Not to mention, muscles look awesome on women.

I suffer from jealousy myself. I want to lose quicker, never happy with where I am or how well I've done. When I get sidelined due to injury, illness, life, and see someone pass me by fitness-wise I turn green. I also start working harder, but probably not for the most altruistic of reasons.

I remind myself constantly this is for my health, not a contest. Doesn't always sink in, but I try.

CrisEBTrue

Everybody and every body is different.

She's obviously jealous that you have a personal trainer.

Are YOU happy with your weight loss? Are you eating Real Food and eating healthfully?
Ignore her jibes... just smile and congratulate her and go about your own routine.

Be yourself. Nobody else is better qualified. :flowerforyou: