Hello boys and girls!

BekaBooluvsu

I would refuse to work with said child. I also would call the authorities on said child. Abuse is abuse.

ETA: If nothing else make a report EVERY TIME of the abuse to cover your own butt incase they do come after you.

Out of the three teachers in this program I get to deal with him the most because "he responds to me best". Hahaha! Lucky me.

We have been writing reports and photo documenting all of our injuries, and obviously those he inflicts on other children. Also, none of us are ever alone with him for any reason.

Wow! I would definitely start a petition to have that kid removed. They are a danger to you and other kids.

bcoop911

This kid can't be removed from the after school program? Seems like he is a danger to others and would easily beat justifiable to kick that little SOB out of the program indefinitely. Are they not allowed to do that anymore??

blink1021

This is a tough situation. I think its unfair the restrictions that they put on people who work with children. I also find it ridiculous what teachers/administrators view as disruptive behavior. As a mother I have seen all different kinds of teachers and kids and all the problems that go along with it.

I am not saying that biting, scratching, kicking or attacking with objects is acceptable and should be tolerated because it shouldn't. If its an after school program he does not have to attend its optional and not a requirement. If I was part of your administration I would write up the offense (paper trail is your friend) and depending on the severity of it I would suspend him from the program for a day or two whatever seems appropriate for the first offense. Then if it doesn't improve then suspend him again. I would say after 3 strikes he is out of the program. Usually a few days suspension is enough to wake up some parents especially when you hit them where it hurts (in the pocketbook).

I am a parent of a child with behavioral issues my son who is now 10 was never a biter, or a kicker he never came after anyone with pencils or anything else but he will argue with you till the sun goes down and he has been known to speak to people in a disrespectful tone and roll his eyes at teachers. I am constantly getting emails from teachers and having conferences over his behavior. Some years have been better than others depends on the teacher. For example he was sent to the office yesterday for making a silly face through the door at another student. Personally I feel that was a little ridiculous and I told her so, but in other years especially in kindergarten he would hide under desks and knock chairs over when he was upset. I have had him in and out of counseling so that they can help him try to control his impulses and behavior. Sounds like that child needs someone to talk to other than mom and dad. The parents need to be involved I found out that just because he wasn't like that at home doesn't mean he won't be like that at school. I just hope my second child isn't that way.

Just try to remember that it isn't the childs fault he needs the guidance and he needs mom and dad to step in and try to help. If you have a guidance counselor go and ask them for help. Just do not talk badly about the child and do not give up on him, my son had teachers ridicule him to other teachers before he got in the grade. I had teachers tell my son on the first day of school that they know they will have problems with him. He came up to me earlier this month and said why should I try to behave they won't believe me and they won't like me. Thats awful to hear from any child.

PghPensFan69

The little demon should be expelled from the school, but it sounds like the school doesn't want to lose the tuition.

I would set up a video camera to record his behavior to protect myself for when the almost certain police report is filed.

The_1_Who_Knocks

It's a private school, they should just kick the kid out.

Mia_RagazzaTosta

This kid can't be removed from the after school program? Seems like he is a danger to others and would easily beat justifiable to kick that little SOB out of the program indefinitely. Are they not allowed to do that anymore??

This was my question. At what point does this kid get expelled?

victal

I have been the parent to such a child. And it IS heart breaking. I took footage on my mobile phone of him actively attacking me for no reason at all whilst in the car. And im not talking about a tantrum, i'm talking it was quite shocking that such vitriolic behaviour could come from a child. He would attack and he would start smashing his head off objects/floors/walls. Trust me its hard to see that.

It was like living with Jekyll and Hyde.

We worked closely with various specialists, for a long time. When he started school last September, within a few weeks, they were threatening to expel him. At 4 years old. Despite the fact that we had been trying to work WITH the school.

We persevered.

We got the behavioural therapist that had worked with him and us, to work with the school. She'd already worked with the nursery previously.

The school teachers learned better ways to communicate with him and better ways to handle him.

Since then, his school life has literally turned around! He's had several awards from the school for outstanding behaviour, or for helping others.

He's still 4.


Don't jump to the conclusion that the parents are to blame.

This^^
I am a parent to such a child also. My son is 4 also and I have had exactly the same problems. It is heart breaking when you have a child like this. I have cried so many times over his behaviour. So many people have said to me 'If he was mine he wouldn't do that'. I get sick of hearing it. My older two children have been brought up the same way and have always been very well behaved. After working with the school and school nurses etc he is slowly improving and there is a little light at the end of the tunnel.

I do not agree with teachers being treat in this way. And I have often wished they could do more to enforce my son does as he's told. But I do feel people are too quick to blame the parents, which is very unfair.

AmykinsCatfood

Why doesn't the program just expel the child? They have a legal right to do so.

The_1_Who_Knocks

I mean, it is obvious that it is your school that is to blame here.

moosegt35

I would just call the police on the little psycho and his worthless parents.

amethyst7986

Teachers are pretty much handcuffed now days. They don't have the tools they need to discipline children. It's sad really. Just the society we live in...

I completely agree. My daughter was being bullied by some girls last year and I was told by the school that that only intervention they could/would do is talk to the girls. I was so outraged by this, I mean those girls were going out of their way to make my daughter's life miserable on school grounds, but the schools hands were tied. At one point they refused to call it bullying because that meant they actually HAD to do something about it, my daughter would break down crying during class because these girls would stand up in class and call her nasty names- hell even the teacher couldn't do much about it--how is that not bullying! Anyways, eventually they got tired of me calling them and my phone calls to the superintendent's office were making their way to them as well, they got things settled.


AS for this child in the program, there has to be a way to get him out. He is not only a danger to himself but other students and teachers. That is very sad and irresponsible that his parents are refusing to acknowledge his temperament and bad behavior. I know in the past, daycares that my daughter was in, they had us sign an agreement stating that they would no longer care for a child that causes harm or places other children in danger. Its a liability for the program/center. I would definitely seek help with your supervisor and/or police. his parents should be held accountable for his actions.
Good luck!

kr1stadee

If my child was being hurt on a regular basis by another child, I would be petitioning for that child to be expelled. If not, I'd be taking my business elsewhere. Why put my child in harms way?

I do have a child like that, as well. He's been diagnosed with ADHD, Anxiety and OCD. Some days are hell. He's 8 now, and strong as an ox. He was on Ritalin during the school hours so he could get through the day. The Ritalin made his coexisting disorders worse. That's where the violent explosions came from, the hitting, spitting, screaming, breaking things, slamming doors.. if he were to act this way in a public setting, you better believe I give permission to his supervising adult to discipline him (we don't spank, so none of that). He was moved to a different medication and has been doing fantastic, even getting some A's on his progress report! Yay!

So, this child may have disorders that aren't treated or recognized, or he could be taking medications that make things worse. Diet is huge with behavioural issues.

Issues CAN be the fault of parents and can also be the fault of surroundings. They also could be no one's fault at all. I think it's time to suggest to the parents that they need to start looking for a program that can better cater to his needs and behaviours. It's not worth risking your safety, or the safety of other children to expose them to these risks daily.

BrokenButBeautiful

I mean, it is obvious that it is your school that is to blame here.

Ikr?

The principle is one of school staff members that has a report against her. I'm not sure why exactly the family even keeps their child here if we're all so awful and need to be reported...

I think that he isn't being expelled right now because of some of issues that would probably come up if they were to expel him. Like full blown lawsuits.

Once again, I am not blaming the parents for his behavior, just their response to those of us who are dealing with it.

PghPensFan69

I have been the parent to such a child. And it IS heart breaking. I took footage on my mobile phone of him actively attacking me for no reason at all whilst in the car. And im not talking about a tantrum, i'm talking it was quite shocking that such vitriolic behaviour could come from a child. He would attack and he would start smashing his head off objects/floors/walls. Trust me its hard to see that.

It was like living with Jekyll and Hyde.

We worked closely with various specialists, for a long time. When he started school last September, within a few weeks, they were threatening to expel him. At 4 years old. Despite the fact that we had been trying to work WITH the school.

We persevered.

We got the behavioural therapist that had worked with him and us, to work with the school. She'd already worked with the nursery previously.

The school teachers learned better ways to communicate with him and better ways to handle him.

Since then, his school life has literally turned around! He's had several awards from the school for outstanding behaviour, or for helping others.

He's still 4.


Don't jump to the conclusion that the parents are to blame.

I don't blame the parents for his behavior and I don't even dislike the child, he has moments when I can see glimpses of his potential. I always point these things out and praise him when he does make good choices.

The only thing I have a problem with is how the parents respond when we try to enforce consequences (guiding him to a timeout chair, taking away privileges) for his bad decisions, ie, reporting us to the police.

THIS

The parents are calling police. Clearly these particular parents don't want to acknowledge that their child has issues that they need to address.

When my daughter was in preschool, such a child walked acrossed the room and struck her with something without cause or provocation. The teacher was mortified to talk to us that day because my daughter wasn't even playing with the child or in the same vacinity.

I have compassion for parents that know their child has issues and are trying to find a solution. Calling the police on the victims certainly isn't the solution.

FoxBean

My mom worked in education for 11 years, and also had to deal with children and parents like this. The child seems to have emotional issues, and should be taken out of that class and put in a special needs class with teachers who are more able to be around this child and help. The parents should be getting this kid some help too! It's definitely not right for them to be filing police reports, maybe they feel guilty and lashing out at the teachers? Seems like the school is not doing it's part on enforcing the removal of the child.

LookMaNoHands

That kid has obviously not been beaten enough. Some kids respond to nonphysical corrections like "time out." Others require a mild spanking, like a slap on the wrist. Then others require a serious whipping with a leather belt on their bottoms. This kid seems like the last sort.

And BTW, just to ensure that there are no problems with pansy-*kitten* getting all "sensitive" and calling child protective services on you for beating him, the trick is that spank him where no one else can see it, and you still refer to the spanking as "time out." Even though both you and he know that it will really be a spanking. That way, when you look at him and say "behave yourself or you will get time out", he will know that it is really a spanking that he is going to get, but everyone else will think that you are only threatening him with time out.

buzybev

Well when he's 16+ and larger/stronger then they are, they will regret enabling and reinforcing his negative behaviors.

buzybev

That kid has obviously not been beaten enough. Some kids respond to nonphysical corrections like "time out." Others require a mild spanking, like a slap on the wrist. Then others require a serious whipping with a leather belt on their bottoms. This kid seems like the last sort.

And BTW, just to ensure that there are no problems with pansy-*kitten* getting all "sensitive" and calling child protective services on you for beating him, the trick is that spank him where no one else can see it, and you still refer to the spanking as "time out." Even though both you and he know that it will really be a spanking. That way, when you look at him and say "behave yourself or you will get time out", he will know that it is really a spanking that he is going to get, but everyone else will think that you are only threatening him with time out.

Nope nope nope. You should never strike a child that is in your care. You are not their parent. I work with children with developmental disabilities/severe behavioral issues (many of which have experienced trauma/been in state custody) and I have never and would never physically discipline them. I have had to contain children who are a danger to themselves or others, but have been trained to do it without causing harm to them or myself. Beating kids doesn't do **** but cause more behavioral issues and resentment.

LookMaNoHands

And BTW, I was also a kid that required a lot of spankings. "Time out" was a JOKE to me. My parents learned very early on that I required a heavy hand. And I am a better, more disciplined person today for it.

FoxBean

That kid has obviously not been beaten enough. Some kids respond to nonphysical corrections like "time out." Others require a mild spanking, like a slap on the wrist. Then others require a serious whipping with a leather belt on their bottoms. This kid seems like the last sort.

And BTW, just to ensure that there are no problems with pansy-*kitten* getting all "sensitive" and calling child protective services on you for beating him, the trick is that spank him where no one else can see it, and you still refer to the spanking as "time out." Even though both you and he know that it will really be a spanking. That way, when you look at him and say "behave yourself or you will get time out", he will know that it is really a spanking that he is going to get, but everyone else will think that you are only threatening him with time out.

I hope you are joking. Children who are violent tend to be victims of abuse and they are lashing out, not always the case but there IS a reason of why.