Losing the weight - and the barriers we have created.

danaberge

This is a little like a ramble... but here it goes:
Losing the weight is also losing an identity the world has put on us. The way people speak to us. The way people respect us and the way we are treated. It's sad in this world that so many people judge others by the way we look. I don't think it's intentional.. but it is there... weather we want to admit it or not.

Does anyone get what i'm saying?

I have been on both sides of the fence. Overweight my whole adolescence and then normal weight for half of my twenties. Then I gained it back... 5 years later with a pregnancy. Because... I never dealt with my underlying issues of food addiction.

Now being overweight - well over 100lbs overweight for almost 8 years ..... again.... and losing the weight... I know that there will be this identity change. That people will view me differently... and even though it's good.. it brings up anger.
Why can't everyone just - not be judgmental. But they are.

Comments???

jec285

Let's be honest, if you didn't think slightly less of a person for being fat you probably wouldn't be here in the first place . Sure you might be doing this for you, but subconsciously I think we tend to assume people look at us the same we do other fat people.

Shallow yes but it's the truth.

bg192905

What you say is true but, those same people will be jealous of you improving your life. I am so tired of folks at work asking me about my weight loss and then telling me how bad they ate or how they dont want to exercise. I am pretty good at ignoring nonsense but they are getting on my nerves. I am truly not doing this for the outside world. My confidence is high in the regard and I have always carried myself well. I am doing this for me and my long term health. Nothing like hitting 45 and those questions start coming up at the doctors office to make you say hmmmm.

crhloses

I don't know if it's judgment that we experience when we make changes; we all get in comfort zones in the way we relate to others. When we marry or divorce, when we gain or lose weight, when we change our hair color or length, when we change jobs, there are going to be people in our lives who find the change uncomfortable. It has less to do with us than it has to do with what they're going through at the moment. Recently I watched a show on PBS called "All of Me: A Story of Love, Loss and Last Resorts". A group of ladies in Austin (?) got together on a regular basis. What they felt they had in common was their obesity and they formed a close-knit support group. When a few of the ladies began to change their eating and exercise habits, the dynamic in the group and in their families began to change. It was a revealing show.

I like the way that you talk about our barriers. They are ours - and we, ultimately, have control over how we choose to overcome or succumb to our own barriers.

Here's wishing you all the success in the world. One day at a time.