Dramatic Gym Day

MayaDyra

Today was a dramatic day. I went to the fitness club with the pool in a hotel that I had contacted for the free trial. When I got there I told them I had arranged a free trial but did it on the phone since their online form hadn't been working. They tried to charge me 1000 NT ($33 USD) but I was like "I don't have that much money on me" and then the woman looked up the thing and found the record of my phone call and they let me go in. I got the feeling they wanted to charge me regardless of whether or not I had arranged a free trial and they didn't really care if I had called in advance or not, although the website and them on the phone clearly said it was a one day free trial.

Anyways I swam one lap with the board, kicking my legs. One lap freestyle both ways. One lap butterfly one way, breast stroke the other way. I stopped after that because I was so exhausted I could barely lift up my head to breathe. Hadn't swum in years. Then I did the weights (3 reps of 15 each) of all the things in the 30 Day Shred that I had missed due to not having weights at home. Then I went on the treadmill and exited the gym. By the way I saw a girl who had a flat stomach wearing a swimming suit. People who aren't fat should go somewhere else so that fat people like me can crawl out of our hole, haha.

By the way, the inspector at the train station made me pay extra for my ticket just because I bought the wrong one, which I took as confirmation that I AM obese, because if I was attractive, the inspector wouldn't have minded about my ticket.

Then I went to MY gym, World Gym, and went on the treadmill. Then I took the Les Mills Body Pump class. I was using the lightest available weights, but I struggled as the exercises went on. The instructor told me to stop 3x. The first 2x I thought he meant stop and take a break but the 3rd time he finally told me to put my things away and leave. I guess he kicked me out of the class because he thinks that I will never lose weight so I shouldn't even bother trying.

Then I was kicked out of the gym as a member because I brought my dog to the jacuzzi. I have to pay 6,000 NT ($200 USD) to cancel my membership. That annoys me because now I have to ask my dad for 6,000 NT and I was leaning towards asking him to ask my mum to buy a perfume for me when she visits Taiwan, at the airport. Now I can't ask and I'm going to have to wait until my birthday. Now my dad will never pay for a gym or even the swimming pool for me again because he'll say that I'll get in trouble again.

Then I went to Dior in the mall because I wanted to try an eye shadow quad, Bleu de Paris. The woman was giving me a hostile attitude from the beginning. I told her I was interested in trying on the eye shadow and asked if I could borrow a makeup brush and she pointed at the eye shadow and said in a mean voice, "That's not a brush, that's eye shadow." Then she reluctantly let me try it on. I told her I couldn't tell if it looked good without applying it with an actual brush and that I would bring my brushes from home next time. She said that I can't try something on without buying it and next time she will charge me. It's not a cultural thing; you are definitely allowed to try things on w/o buying in Taiwan, but she was just being hateful. She probably thought that I'm so fat that it's clear that I don't take care of my appearance, so she felt I'm not going to ever buy anything, and she thought that I don't matter because I'm fat, so she was rude to me. For the record though, I've bought all the Dior brushes except the lip brush, several Forever foundations, blushers, bronzers, eye shadows, eyeliners, and nail polishes from Dior, so she should not judge me based on my weight.

The worst part of today, which I'm trying not to think about, was that when I weighed myself, I was STILL 56.9 kg. I have been exercising so much that I struggled to get down the stairs this morning. I have been doing Insanity and the 30 Day Shred but it is of no use at all. They are obviously just a gimmick with photoshopped photos of people that lost weight. If I don't lose weight soon I am going to stop eating, I am sick and tired of being ugly. My face, legs, and arms are fine, but the lower half of my upper body is fat.