I was sabotaged today

canbecanbe

I was sabotaged today i was having a nap after looking after 4 extra kids all morning I was woken by there mother my sister with food(grrrrr) and she sat and watched me eat it so i couldn't stash it or feed it to one of her kids. i thought ok little set back i will check the packet before i go home and have a healthy dinner what she gave me is over 2 days worth of calories if i were on a 1200 witch i am not i have spoken to her before about doing this but it is so hard to say you are as wide as a house and i am not can you stop being such a b**** about it

ScillyPuffin

Consider eating just a little to show appreciation, then graciously thank her for such a lovely treat and tell her that you'd like to save what is left for later. After she's gone you can put it in the freezer or give it away or throw it away.

robin52077

Did she have a gun to your head while she "sat and watched me eat it " ?
You COULD have said no thank you, or even said you'd take it home and eat it later.
YOU are in control of what you do, and if you make excuses for eating something horrible and blame it on someone else then you will only fail long term.
If you change your mindset and take control of your own actions you will have a much better time of your journey to a healthy weight.

ebean

Yeah. It's definitely hard when people don't -understand- what you're trying to do and look at you funny when you decline something you'd usually have eaten without thinking.

Just remember, you're in control. If your sister brings you some food, tell her thanks, but you already ate.

Or at least check the package first and explain to her that if you ate it, it would put you over your calorie count for the day and you're committed to sticking to your goals.

Don't feel pressured into sitting and eating what she's brought you. If she's concerned enough to sit and police you, while eat the food to prevent you from stashing it, she ought to be concerned enough not to bring it into your house in the first place.

As for not wanting you to feed it to her kids.... If she wouldn't feed it to them because it's unhealthy.... Then why is she offering it to you?!

It sounds like you might need to educate her about what you're trying to do and ask her to -not- bring treats and high-calorie items to your place.

The harder you stick to your guns were -other- people are concerned, the more they'll take you seriously, and probably even start asking you questions about what you're doing. Especially as your body begins to show results!

canbecanbe

I like the way you think, YOU ARE RIGHT in the end it is my choice i was at her house so i couldn't ''save it for later'' but i have trouble saying no to her. I no it is my power to do so but she can be very abrasive and i find myself spending my days off looking after her kids because she has trouble getting around and makes you feel terribly guilty

aprilgicker

I would find that I am busy going somewhere like the "doctor", "Dentist", or anything that you can't change and disappear to a museum, zoo, art gallery, ect.
If she can get around then this is Not Your Burden. However if she just needs a little time to herself do it once a month. You need down time too. Don't be a push over. No one ever appreciates you for everything you do, just the little things. So make them little things.

Dra57

How about tackling this before you are presented with actual food? take an opportunity to talk to her at a peaceful moment and expalin that although you know she loves to nurture people / you with food, and you really appreciate that, but you want to get fitter and healthier and eating fattening foods won't help.
if she really wants to see you succeed she could bring flowers, nice soap, perfume, etc. as a treat.

mangorabbit

If you are truly eating 500 cal or less a day, you cannot fault ANYONE who cares for you for trying to get you to eat in front of them.

I apologize if that seems unfair or harsh, but at 400-500 cal a day you are going to destroy your body. If you don't feed it, your body will find the things it needs - taking them from organs and leeching things like calcium from your bones. It will also slow down your metabolism and essentially screw your weight loss plan, because it will hold on to every possible bit of energy it can, and store it as fat.

I don't condone the forcing of anyone to eat if they choose not to, and I apologize for the less-than-fluffy tone of the above. I am sure you have heard all those things before, and I highly doubt that coming from some random entity via a website they will give you any pause, but I felt that I should try.

canbecanbe

i am trying to eat over 500 cal a day but there is a journey involved and i have come from eating nothing so when presented with 2000 cal desert and given little option but to eat it (i know i have a choice) all i want to do is through up so conceder that before you tell me i am ruining my body, also my body is NOT in starvation mode so very little of what you said applies I have a nutritionist who is working ""with me'' to get me over 600 -700 with out purging and i am on better supplements now so no as far as my sister she makes out right rude comments. it is not a matter of her caring because she is so self centered the rest of the family all joke about the psychopath black sheep and if i am taking health tips from her i better order a super duper large coffin because she is 225kg or 496 pounds and that was over a year ago

mangorabbit

Fair enough, and thank you for your clarity.
I apologize for the misunderstanding, having popped over to your profile page to perhaps get a slightly better idea of where you were coming from, I found the statement 'I will stay under 500 cal a day.' and found it a bit alarming.

That you are working with qualified professionals to get to a point that is healthy for you, in a way that is safe and sustainable is a laudable effort, and I applaud you.

You care enough to do what is right, and are willing to make the effort which is truly a HUGE step forward. I did not consider the things you have just mentioned in my previous post, because I was unaware of them.

It is truly unfortunate that your family are not willing to support you in your choices to be healthy, I hope that MFP can perhaps provide that positive reinforcement and encouragement that is so important in the process of changing ones lifestyle.

Be well, and I am proud of you for your efforts, both in the past and as they continue.