Another Failure

cindibutler80
cindibutler80 Posts: 23 Member
in Motivation and Support
I am back for the first time in a few months. I wish I had a success story to share but I don't. I have failed. I ended up losing about 20 pounds since I stopped on here but have since gained it all back because of falling back into bad habits. I have learned more about myself in these past few months though. I know now that I do not have the willpower to only have a treat once in awhile. I know that I must give up all sweets and eating out or else it becomes habit again. I cannot make excuses that it's a birthday party or I'm on vacation or the awful "only this one time." I know that I cannot withstand the temptation. I know I feel better when I have no sweets and I only eat what I cook at home.

I know that when I was losing this past 20 lbs that I felt awesome, eating strictly vegan with no sweets. That was within one month that I lost, then I allowed myself to start having treats again...and I screwed up. Now I am back at square one, and I will not say I am determined this time because I have every time I have started. I love food. I hate trying to carve out time for exercise yet I HATE working at a desk all day. I have a garden planted and plan to work in it a lot. I hope to go for walks on occasion. I hope to stick to eating at home without processed foods or sweets. I am looking for motivation today to wake me up to the fact that I need to live like that forever, and not stay victim to the recliner and sugar. I cannot look at it as a diet. I cannot look at it as temporary, but as a lifestyle that I WANT to live. If I do not, I will fail again.

Each failure is more miserable than the last. I have tried attaching rewards to my goals but everything has failed with me because it became impossible to have the reward anyways. I want my reward to be health. I want to be able to bend and lift and not have to worry about my back going out. I want to working in the garden without getting cramps in my legs and feet so that I have to stand and walk every five minutes. I don't want to have to worry about having a stroke or a heart attack every time my head hurts or I have short of breath. I am tired of being the fat girl when in crowds. I am tired of people ignoring me because I'm fat. I want to be able to do things with friends like go to the beach without having to fear what I will look like or if I can walk down to the water without having to stop. I feel like a slob and to be honest, I act more and more like one.

Well, I don't want to be a slob anymore. I want to be radiant. I want to glow from self-confidence. I want to be able to be able to hike in the mountains and enjoy nature. I want a lot of things but what I really want is the hope, the belief that I can do it, because that is what I have lost after so many failures.

Replies

  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    then stop treating this as a temporary fix...

    There is no need to cut out your favorite foods that is why you failed.

    Eat at a reasonable deficet, keeping in all the foods you love but just in smaller portions.

    After you lose the weight continue logging...
  • sheilaq14
    sheilaq14 Posts: 35 Member
    Have you looked into the Every Other Day Diet? It is not for everyone, but I love it. You eat only 500 cal every other day, then whatever you want within reason the other days (2200-2700) for me. I can always get through the low day because I know the nice high cal day is coming tomorrow! Good luck with whatever you decide for your journey.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Sounds like you're asking for another lump.

    Do what she said, it's the truth
    then stop treating this as a temporary fix...

    There is no need to cut out your favorite foods that is why you failed.

    Eat at a reasonable deficet, keeping in all the foods you love but just in smaller portions.

    After you lose the weight continue logging...
  • _MG_
    _MG_ Posts: 453 Member
    I know that when I was losing this past 20 lbs that I felt awesome, eating strictly vegan with no sweets. That was within one month that I lost, then I allowed myself to start having treats again...and I screwed up.

    As I see it - when you ban any food you are setting yourself up for failure.

    Make healthier food choices but still include the foods you like.
    Log everything.
    Eat a reasonable caloric deficit
    Profit

    Have you looked into the Every Other Day Diet? It is not for everyone, but I love it. You eat only 500 cal every other day, then whatever you want within reason the other days (2200-2700) for me. I can always get through the low day because I know the nice high cal day is coming tomorrow! Good luck with whatever you decide for your journey.

    Glad that works for you - it sounds terrible. Why not just eat a moderate deficit each day? Then there's no need to "get through" a day.
  • katedaniels1985
    katedaniels1985 Posts: 6
    Have you tried getting an exercise machine for home? I bought a 2in1 crosstrainer/bike. I have that in front of the tv in my bedroom so I technically i'm still sat in front of the tv but I can cycle, 20 minutes cycling works out at roughly one tube of rolos. That way you can still have the treat. I tried weight watchers and cut out all of the sweets, the first thing I did when I gave up after hitting the plateau was to gorge on chocolate, I am not prepared to give it up completely and I appreciate it so much more if I have to work for it. Also, because the exercise machine is at home no one can see my flabby bits jiggling when I'm exercising :)

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