Why we deserve to be healthy...

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GC527
GC527 Posts: 272 Member
in Getting Started
First of all, I am not here to lose a small amount of weight. I am here to lose over 100 pounds. It's going to be hard, I am going to get down and I know there will be days when I slip or don't do my best. But I will do this. How many of you have cried at the thought of putting on a pair of jeans or a dress? What about when it is brutally hot outside and you force yourself into capri's at best or pants at worst because you are embarrassed of your chubby legs? Wanna talk about sleeveless shirts? Psssh! Never. Unless of course they are under a cardigan or I am home alone. Get winded after climbing a couple floors of stairs? What about get tired from just thinking about trying to clothes shop?

If you are any thing like me then this isn't the first time you've tried losing weight. But how about we make it the last? I know the components of weight loss; healthy diet, exercise and time. It sounds simple, but oh man, it isn't! Instead of asking you why you want to lose weight I am asking you why don't you want to lose weight? Is there anything that scares you or makes you uncomfortable about the thought of being thinner or healthier? What is your fat and unhealthy body doing FOR you?

Don't you deserve to be healthy and feel better in your own body? I think we do and I think we can all do it together.
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Replies

  • runsoborun
    runsoborun Posts: 43 Member
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    I love your post! It is so true! I have been trying to lose the same weight for the last 15 years of my life. I am focusing on being healthy everyday! One step at a time! We can do this!!
  • rak173
    rak173 Posts: 105 Member
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    AMEN! I am looking at this journey as a lifestyle change. The word diet does not exist in my world. Thanks for the motivation and positivity!
  • onefortyone
    onefortyone Posts: 531 Member
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    Great post :) I feel the same - I cried when I tried on all my jeans because none of them buttoned up. Literally none of them. They're all still inside out on my bedroom floor where I threw them in a fit of sadness. I looked at my Wii Fit and it's a zig-zag of gaining then losing the same 15-20lbs :( I do want this to be the 'last time' I lose the bulk of my weight - about 60lbs.

    Unfortunately I do not have sleeveless tops and short-shorts to look forward to, as I am stretch-marked to high heaven, but normal-sized clothes, being able to see my jawline, and having a healthy pregnancy some time next year are big motivators for me. We all deserve to be healthy, and I am willing to work hard to make that happen!
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    Honestly I've never considered that I "deserve" to be healthy and I'm not even sure what that means really. How does anyone "deserve" health? By being a good person? Unfortunately the world doesn't operate that way. If I want to be healthy it is something that I must take by force through my own will dedication and perseverance, it will never be handed to me by fate simply because I am worthy of it in some philosophical way. You get what you take, there are no handouts in life and I prefer the stark coldness of that outlook as I find it more effective for my motivation.
  • GC527
    GC527 Posts: 272 Member
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    I believe that everyone deserves to enjoy life. I believe that everyone must work to attain that joy but that all who try are deserving of it. I'm saying get off your *kitten* and get it done, because you are worth doing it! I am in no way saying that it will be handed to anyone. I am saying that it will be worth the effort.
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
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    I think the word "deserve" comes in because a lot of us have felt, at one point or another, that we didn't deserve good things to happen to us. That we were ugly or unloveable or deficient to such a degree that we deserved to be sad or sick or alone. If someone hasn't felt that way (for a significant period of time...I'm not talking about a few hours or a day here or there), using the word "deserve" in that context doesn't make a lot of sense. But if you have felt that way, realizing that you deserve good things in your life can be a revelation.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    I believe that everyone deserves to enjoy life. I believe that everyone must work to attain that joy but that all who try are deserving of it. I'm saying get off your *kitten* and get it done, because you are worth doing it! I am in no way saying that it will be handed to anyone. I am saying that it will be worth the effort.

    I wish people the best but the only way you deserve to be a certain thing is if you work hard to attain it. People do not "deserve" things by default. Someone who doesn't work a day in their life does not "deserve" to be wealthy even though being wealthy is something that most people would want to be. Similarly someone who isn't watching their calories and exercising to a sufficient degree to be healthy does not "deserve" to be healthy even though being healthy is something that most people want to be.

    I wish that everyone could be healthy and happy and wealthy and what not but I would not go as far as to say everyone deserves it, to me that seems to take all the respect out of achievement. Health is something you achieve and the only people who deserve it are those who attain it. I do not consider myself to "deserve" health anymore than I consider myself to "deserve" wealth.

    I know that might seem to be a grim outlook to some but I find the reality of that situation to be much more motivating than the idea that I deserve something.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    I think the word "deserve" comes in because a lot of us have felt, at one point or another, that we didn't deserve good things to happen to us. That we were ugly or unloveable or deficient to such a degree that we deserved to be sad or sick or alone. If someone hasn't felt that way (for a significant period of time...I'm not talking about a few hours or a day here or there), using the word "deserve" in that context doesn't make a lot of sense. But if you have felt that way, realizing that you deserve good things in your life can be a revelation.

    Alright I guess in that context I understand. If you mean coming out of depression to the realization that you can achieve what you set out to achieve as realizing you "deserve" something then okay. Just was confused by the idea because not how I see the world at all. That is just realizing that you can be worthy of earning something to which you work hard for which can be hard if you are depressed. If that is what is meant here by "deserve" I get that.

    The way I use or think about "deserve" is its a concept that someone you are owed something despite not necessarily working towards it. That by default you are owed something regardless of your effort. That is the idea I sort of disdain and it is possible we are just speaking past each-other based on different semantic ideas of what the word means.

    I will feel that I deserve to be healthy at the point in which I attain health through my own action.
  • KariOrtiz2014
    KariOrtiz2014 Posts: 343 Member
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    WE deserve to be healthy!!
  • GC527
    GC527 Posts: 272 Member
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    de·serve/dɪˈzɜrv/ Show Spelled [dih-zurv] Show IPA
    verb (used with object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    1. to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) because of actions, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
    verb (used without object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    2. to be worthy of, qualified for, or have a claim to reward, punishment, recompense, etc.: to reward him as he deserves; an idea deserving of study.
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
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    why I don't want to lose the weight, I guess it is because I love food, it is soooo good. Also, it is my way to cope, I don't want to problem solve, it is much easier to eat. I don't feel any pain when I eat, stress free. I am just like an alcoholic. It temporary makes me feel good! then comes the consequences. oh yea, I am lazy, I had rather be on the couch with chips than at the gym.

    The consequences is why I want to lose weight. I hate not fitting in my clothes and going to the doctor and being so heavy and I tend to isolate when I get fat. I am learning to take care of myself for a change instead of everyone else.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    Maybe saying what I think people do deserve would make more sense.

    I think everyone deserves access to fresh water, nutritious food and adequate health care. Health however, in the sense of fitness, is something you earn...not something you deserve.
  • GC527
    GC527 Posts: 272 Member
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    de·serve/dɪˈzɜrv/ Show Spelled [dih-zurv] Show IPA
    verb (used with object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    1. to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) *****{{{{{{{{BECAUSE OF ACTIONS}}}}}}}}***, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
    verb (used without object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    2. to be worthy of, qualified for, or have a claim to reward, punishment, recompense, etc.: to reward him as he deserves; an idea deserving of study.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    de·serve/dɪˈzɜrv/ Show Spelled [dih-zurv] Show IPA
    verb (used with object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    1. to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) because of actions, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
    verb (used without object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    2. to be worthy of, qualified for, or have a claim to reward, punishment, recompense, etc.: to reward him as he deserves; an idea deserving of study.

    I am familiar with the definition.

    My point is if you follow actions that would make you healthy then you will be healthy at which point you deserve it. The problem is you only deserve it after the fact that you took the actions to get there so its sort of moot. If you are not healthy then it is because you have taken insufficient action to attain health and therefore you do not deserve it. You do not suddenly start deserving it just because after years of being unhealthy you recently started dieting. Before you think this is a personal attack I think the same of myself, I have not "deserved" health because I did not put in the sufficient time or effort to attain the level of health I would like. At the point I have managed to do so and attain that level of health I will have deserved it. Until then I have not "qualified for, or have claim to because of actions" health.

    EDIT: I feel I need to clarify that by "health" I mean it in terms of fitness not lack of illness. I do not think people who are ill from a disease have simply not worked hard enough to rid themselves of the illness that would be silly.
  • MarlaVSings
    MarlaVSings Posts: 66 Member
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    something you earn...not something you deserve.


    Well said!
  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
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    de·serve/dɪˈzɜrv/ Show Spelled [dih-zurv] Show IPA
    verb (used with object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    1. to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) because of actions, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
    verb (used without object), de·served, de·serv·ing.
    2. to be worthy of, qualified for, or have a claim to reward, punishment, recompense, etc.: to reward him as he deserves; an idea deserving of study.

    I am familiar with the definition.

    My point is if you follow actions that would make you healthy then you will be healthy at which point you deserve it. The problem is you only deserve it after the fact that you took the actions to get there so its sort of moot. If you are not healthy then it is because you have taken insufficient action to attain health and therefore you do not deserve it. Before you think this is a personal attack I think the same of myself, I have not "deserved" health because I did not put in the sufficient time or effort to attain the level of health I would like. At the point I have managed to do so and attain that level of health I will have deserved it. Until then you have not "qualified for, or have claim to because of actions"

    EDIT: I feel I need to clarify that by "health" I mean it in terms of fitness not lack of illness. I do not think people who are ill from a disease have simply not worked hard enough to rid themselves of the illness that would be silly.

    I have to agree. IMO, health isn't something people deserve, but a reward for hard work.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    I am working towards my fitness goal but I will only deserve being fit once I am fit because at that point I will have taken sufficient action to become fit. Before then my action was insufficient to merit fitness by definition (ie the fact that I am not fit). If believing you deserve to be healthy actually helps to motivate you to exercise and diet in a healthy manner then more power to you honestly, but that doesn't work for me so leave me out of the "We" in "Why we deserve to be healthy." I prefer to wait until I've earned it. :-)
  • mary_pr37
    mary_pr37 Posts: 3 Member
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    Its so true all you said.
    Please count with me for mutual support, I was just Dx with Diabetes. need to loose 55 pounds
    So let's play were getting healthy by the minute.:smile::flowerforyou:
  • jasminemars01
    jasminemars01 Posts: 27
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    why don't you want to lose weight? Is there anything that scares you or makes you uncomfortable about the thought of being thinner or healthier? What is your fat and unhealthy body doing FOR you?

    Don't you deserve to be healthy and feel better in your own body? I think we do and I think we can all do it together.

    This is a good question. There are many reasons why people keep on weight, and it is not all about being lazy and liking food. Some people would not agree with this, however.

    A person might not even be aware they are keeping on weigh to fulfill a certain psychological need. And if they do, they might be deathly afraid to admit it to anyone because - well, how many people would actually ADMIT they are fat on purpose? How sick is that?

    People are always comparing themselves to others. You can't get rid of social comparison. It is something we all do, whether consciously or not. People who are especially attractive, rich, smart, successful, etc. are often targets. Sometimes they were targets growing up, so they are scared to shine when they are adults. They may have had a narcissistic mother or grew up in an abusive household. They learned not to outdo their siblings. It is not uncommon for gifted children to underachieve or act like they are not enjoying their gifts.

    Sometimes this fear of making others feel uncomfortable becomes perverse. The fear of standing out and shining grows into something quite ugly. If a person does not have good boundaries, then they can be taken advantage of, and that doesn't feel good.

    Fat is a protective barrier, period. It is a statement to the world to leave you alone, as you are overworked and underappreciated and burdened by others' demands. It is a way of cocooning away and resting and being alone. It is a way of saying a big f0you to your parents or anyone else who picked on you or brought you down. It is like saying, "Ok, you think I am a loser. Now I am. How do you like it?" It is a way of punishing others.

    Of course, I know that a lot of people reading this will just become enraged or incredulous at the thought that anyone could think the above.

    More people than anyone realizes use fat as a statement, as a device, as a coping mechanism, as a barrier. Right or wrong, it is everywhere around us. And it is not weak people that become afflicted with unhealthy patterns of thought that they can't get out of - or can't escape from easily.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
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    " I am asking you why don't you want to lose weight?"

    This is an interesting question. I allowed myself to get overweight after becoming fit not all that long ago. The reason I tell myself is because I stopped focusing on my body and started focusing on my career instead, a complete sort of focus at the expense of everything else. As a result I slowly but surely packed on the pounds and lost the strength gains I had made previously. Here is the thing though. When I was focused on career like a hawk I wasn't even really aware of my body and there is something liberating about that. When I care about my fitness it makes me aware of imperfections in myself, what I want but do not have. When I didn't pay attention to my fitness I was free of all of that, I really didn't care and therefore there was no stress or burden on me from it and I was free to do other things in my life.

    Long story short I think the times when I have been reluctant to lose fat it was because I realized that if I started down that road I would become, once again, painfully aware of my imperfections and being far from my ideal self. It can be nice to be oblivious sometimes.

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