Women over 40...body changes...

misty1290

Hi All! I am 45 years old, 5-5". I've been physically active for a number of years and I've hovered between 117-122lbs. I was working really hard (HIIT workouts, running, weight training) and I felt good.... Enter unpleasant relationship/family issues -- and then all of a sudden, the workouts just made me feel so tired and demotivated. So, I slacked on the exercise and combined with a sudden desire to cook - and eat - I gained about 10lbs. I'm now trying to get back to my feel-good range.

The strange thing is this that I'm finding that even when I lose weight now, my shape is not what it used to be. My upper body (arms, chest, back) are still good. But the curve I used to have in my torso is just not there anymore. I just feel really broad in that area. Where is my waistline? I know that sounds crazy, but I'm wondering if anyone else is finding that as they are getting older their body shape is not what it was used to be even after they lose weight?

BTW... I know I'm obsessive and I'm trying really hard not to beat myself up every time I look in the mirror.

Mkristoff1206

I am 42 and have had two children; I'm the same size in clothes as I was in my twenties but they don't fit as well as they used to
You are not alone, it is just a fact of getting older. Women start to hold weight more in the belly area - it used to be my butt & thighs but its more in my belly now. Also, it is just harder to maintain muscle because we lose muscle mass as we age. Keep at it but I find I have to really work out a lot and watch what I eat more so than ever if I want to maintain my weight. Good luck.

misty1290

Thanks for the response. I have a friend who is 10 years older than me and she told me it gets progressively harder to maintain. Her weight redistributed to her breasts. She jokes that the boob-fairy came. It just sucks to work so hard and still not have the shape I once had even though my weight isn't so different.

bcattoes

If you are not already there, you might be nearly perimenopause. That's when my waist started to disappear. It doesn't matter what weight I am at, the difference between my hip and waist is less than it used to be.

skinnyinnotime

Hi there I'm 45 and I am sick to death of my belly, no matter how thin I get or how much weight I lift it's always there. The rest of me looks good enough but my belly looks like it just doesn't belong arggghh!!! I guess being stretched out from 3 big babies did permanent damage :sad:

misty1290

I have two kids so I understand. I've got stretch marks from hell.

Brandolin11

It just sucks to work so hard and still not have the shape I once had even though my weight isn't so different.

It does suck. And yet - this is life... thus at some point you'll need to grieve this, accept it, and do the best you can with what you got...then call it a day and be peaceful and happy.

It will take time and effort to reconcile this in your mind. But whatever you do, don't stew on it, obsess over it, or beat yourself up over it. That's different than grieving. It gets you nowhere. Grieving breeds acceptance and movement (eventually). Beating breeds stress and overeating and lack of motivation to work out.

Say to yourself, "well, this is life. This is reality. This is where I live. I made a choice to overeat and neglect my workouts, and I'm getting older. Yeah, that sucks! Big time! I wish it were different, but it is not. So what am I going to do? Lay on the bed and cry? No. I will take the body I have and work on it. I will take the knowledge I have and apply it. I will be grateful that I have four limbs that work so that I can work out. I will be grateful that I have food to eat when there are starving people in this world. I will be responsible with my mind and body. I will love myself. I will start right now. And I'll be content with the results."

Repeat this mantra until you believe it. Because it's the truth. And it's best to believe and live in the truth. Good luck - you're not alone!

paulinegrant01

bump to read at home

RebelMiltonMom

Uggggh, 40 hit me like a ton o' bricks!! All of the weight I've gained since 40 has been in spots it never was before...gut, thighs, and arms especially! I believe I must've hit perimenopause myself:sad:

misty1290

Not what I wanted to hear... but what I NEEDED to hear. You are absolutely right.

My grandmothers both told me when I was young that age has a way of showing up on you physically without you ever seeing it coming. It's an interesting thing when you're trying to reconcile the mental feeling that you can do everything you used to but the results are now different. I won't let that be an excuse for not doing what needs to be done however.

Thanks for the wisdom.

Brandolin11

Not what I wanted to hear... but what I NEEDED to hear. You are absolutely right.

My grandmothers both told me when I was young that age has a way of showing up on you physically without you ever seeing it coming. It's an interesting thing when you're trying to reconcile the mental feeling that you can do everything you used to but the results are now different. I won't let that be an excuse for not doing what needs to be done however.

Thanks for the wisdom.

Your grandmothers were wise! Good for you to take that attitude. It will take time to come to grips, and that's okay. And remember, it's not hopeless. You can still look beautiful and accept yourself for what you have become (and can become). In fact, this will be a good exercise in character and maturity. I know, I know...who wants maturity when what you really want is your smokin' body back!! lol. But seriously, growing into contentment and being resolved to be the best you that you can be, will be what's best for you in the long run. Looks are great, but no matter WHAT, they will fade. It is better to have a good heart and a strong mind. And a strong body, even if it doesn't look *exactly* the way it used to.