LGBTQAP+

StarvingInSuburbia

Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning, asexual, pansexual +

What do you think about BEING LGBTQAP?
What is your sexuality?
If someone came out unexpectedly, what would your reaction be?

I'm pansexual. I think it's perfectly fine, it's just one thing that makes up another fabulous person. If someone came out? I might be a bit surprised, but cool. I feel you and I'm here for you.

mrphil86

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

wheird

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

It does. And it sucks because that makes me hate it, despite loving teh gays.

TheSlorax

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

i thought i was just high for a second but now that you mention it... it totally does

SwashBlogger

Human sexuality is so fascinating. I find that though i lead a life as a straight woman, I am very non-judgemental about how ohers identify. In fact, I generally have to fight off the urge to ask a million questions and think it's brave to be honest about your needs, loves and preferences!:drinker:

wheird

So what the hell are the A and P?

TheSlorax

So what the hell are the A and P?

asexual and pansexual

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asexuality

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexual

wheird

So what the hell are the A and P?

asexual and pansexual

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asexuality

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexual

God that this point I don't even care anymore.

Luke_I_am_your_spotter

if youre happy who gives a shi what others think.. go for it.

Luke_I_am_your_spotter

So what the hell are the A and P?

asexual and pansexual

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asexuality

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexual

God that this point I don't even care anymore.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

SomeGirlSomewhere

I am straight.

People have come out to me before and in a few cases, like the OP, I was surprised. But in all cases I was honored that the person trusted me enough to feel comfortable sharing such personal information with me.

cakebatter07

if youre happy who gives a shi what others think.. go for it.

^this.

GertrudeHorse

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

It does. And it sucks because that makes me hate it, despite loving teh gays.

So including a wider range of queer identities makes you angry for some reason?

ETA: I think the most widely used acronym is LGBTQQIA. As in lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, questioning, intersex and asexual. I always thought pansexual was included under queer, but I'm sure adding another letter is fine. I like QUILTBAG myself where the first Q doubles as queer and questioning, and the U is for unsure. QUILTBAG is fun to say too

krawhitham

What's pansexual? I've never heard of it before.

As a boring heterosexual, I love hearing about others' sexualities. I like it when people are free to be themselves.

suremeansyes

I'm pansexual and if someone came out to me it would be fine.

ETA: Oh, and what do I think about being pansexual...not much really. I don't think about it often.

suremeansyes

What's pansexual? I've never heard of it before.

As a boring heterosexual, I love hearing about others' sexualities. I like it when people are free to be themselves.

"The concept of pansexuality rejects the gender binary, the "notion of two genders and indeed of specific sexual orientations", as pansexual people are open to relationships with people who do not identify as strictly men or women."

So like, for me, I am attracted to men, women, feminine men, masculine women, androgynous types, whatever. Whoever floats my boat, basically.

wheird

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

It does. And it sucks because that makes me hate it, despite loving teh gays.

So including a wider range of queer identities makes you angry for some reason?

ETA: I think the most widely used acronym is LGBTQQIA. As in lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, questioning, intersex and asexual. I always thought pansexual was included under queer, but I'm sure adding another letter is fine. I like QUILTBAG myself where the first Q doubles as queer and questioning, and the U is for unsure. QUILTBAG is fun to say too

No, the fact that it creates an Us versus Them mentality amongst that group.

BraveNewdGirl

No, the fact that it creates an Us versus Them mentality amongst that group.

Because that mentality didn't exist already and it was definitely LGBTQAP+ individuals that created it. Thanks for representing cis white male privilege for us here today. We just don't see enough of it.

pierremignon

Human sexuality is fluid. I do hope that in the future, people wouldn't need to come out. It just comes across as heterosexuality being the norm.

Cheechos

What do you think about BEING LGBTQAP?

Not much. It's a pretty normal part of who I am, but I guess if you mean being a part of the movement for better representation/more rights/etc., then it can be frustrating sometimes because different people want different things and one of us can't speak for all of us collectively.

What is your sexuality?

Pansexual

If someone came out unexpectedly, what would your reaction be?

Acceptance, of course.

karinajean2388

I am super gay. I enjoy being super gay. And I would think it was pretty sweet if someone unexpectedly came out to me. Yay gay.

yungibear

I am straight but I have always been interested in human sexuality. I think a thing that threw a wrench in the system for me was that I am Christian and was raised to look down on the LGBT community and the "behaviors" that came along with it. I was told to "love the sinner, but hate the sin." It makes me very sad that I had thought that way before and I wish I could change the past.

At first, when I was younger (say, elementary to high school), I just listened to those who were older Christians. Whenever I asked, I was always given those same few Bible verses that talked about how homosexuality was treated in the Old Testament. I never really felt satisfied with those answers because they were so repetitive!

I didn't really learn to think on my own until I went to university. There, I was able to study the sociological side of human sexuality and political turmoil the LGBTQ* community has gone through in our history. The thing that changed me was the history of AIDs documentary I watched in my social work class in my previous semester. I was in this middle ground where I felt like it was wrong to judge, but I also did not understand the concept of sexual identity. When I saw how much hurt the LGBTQ* community had endured and how they lost so many friends due to HIV and AIDs, my eyes were opened to what was wrong with the way this community had been treated, especially by the church.

I will always feel regretful for the way I had thought before, but I also want to say that I will be a loyal ally to anyone who chooses to come out to me, as it is an uphill battle for many individuals.

neandermagnon

re: ever increasingly long acronyms:

I'm human and I like to have sex with humans. I'm not bothered which specific humans other humans like to have sex with so long as all involved are consenting adult humans. All of what you list in LBGTQ whatever it is, is part of normal human variation. I don't see the need to put people in boxes and attach labels to them based on it. I'm inclined to say you should move away from an increasingly complex labelling system and instead emphasise the whole normal human variation aspect of it. People don't need to be categorised for you to be able to fight against prejudice and hostility based on gender and/or sexuality. And additionally, while exclusive heterosexuality is considered the cultural "norm" in our society (even though biology says otherwise) it doesn't mean that exclusively heterosexual people can't also be part of the same cause and be good friends and supporters of people who have different sexual preferences.

I get it that the acronym is getting longer because you want to include everyone.... which is a good reason to abandon categorising and labelling people and just have an all-inclusive umbrella term instead. There is too much variability and individuality to find enough labels to suit everyone.

Also another reason why I don't like labels, you could get two people with the same preference (e.g. mostly into heterosexual sex but a little bit into homosexual sex) - one could be raised in a homophobic culture, deny any preference for homosexuality (or even fail to ever discover it), and they'd get labelled as "straight"... the other could be raised in a much less prejudicial environment and end up mostly having heterosexual sex and sometimes having homosexual sex, and they'd get labelled as "bisexual"........ yet their innate preferences are the same. The current definition seems that you're "straight" until you either have sex with someone the same gender as you, or admit to wanting to (but from the acronym, the one who just admits to wanting to is "questioning" rather than "bisexual" which makes even less sense to me) - yet biologically speaking they're the same.

I consider (for scientific reasons, having studied anthropology and primatology) that human sexuality is on a continuum from exclusive heterosexuality to exclusive homosexuality and with most humans falling somewhere between those to extremes depending on the degree to which they prefer one kind of sex over the other. But most modern cultures pushes people towards the exclusively heterosexual end of the spectrum. Additionally, there are asexual people as well, so even that model is inadequate for describing the full variability of human sexuality. But my overall point is that human sexuality does not exist in neat little boxes, it exists on continuums/spectrums with a lot of variability.



ETA: on the subject of primatology - pansexual.... is that Pan paniscus or Pan troglodytes :laugh: ........ I guess Pan paniscus are most definitely pansexual, and about as pansexual as can be.

Butterfly288837359

To each their own.

I wouldn't want someone to infringe on my rights so I wouldn't on theirs.

Right now I'm celebate so it doesn't really matter.

Good on them for being honest with the world finally.

michellemybelll

Human sexuality is fluid. I do hope that in the future, people wouldn't need to come out. It just comes across as heterosexuality being the norm.

+1

michellemybelll

...my overall point is that human sexuality does not exist in neat little boxes, it exists on continuums/spectrums with a lot of variability.

+1 again

GertrudeHorse

Is it me or does that acronym get longer every time?

It does. And it sucks because that makes me hate it, despite loving teh gays.

So including a wider range of queer identities makes you angry for some reason?

ETA: I think the most widely used acronym is LGBTQQIA. As in lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, questioning, intersex and asexual. I always thought pansexual was included under queer, but I'm sure adding another letter is fine. I like QUILTBAG myself where the first Q doubles as queer and questioning, and the U is for unsure. QUILTBAG is fun to say too

No, the fact that it creates an Us versus Them mentality amongst that group.

Actually by calling queer people "that group" you are perpetuating an us/them dichotomy. Now might be an opportune moment to reflect on your own privilege as a white, het, cis dude. You probably never need labels because your identity has always been considered the "norm" and "default". For people who have and still are excluded from that majority, there can be comfort and community in adopting a label.

Some people don't like labels, no one says they have to label themselves. Other people do like labels and find them a helpful way of explaining their identity and finding other people who share some of their experiences. Ultimately, labels are there if you want to use them. If you don't, then move along. Someone else's choice to label themselves doesn't affect you.

BinaryPulsar

I understand the good in the acronym being inclusive to the variation of humans that is so often treated as if it doesn't matter. Lesbian, gay, bisexual orientations and including gender such as trans and intersex, etc. I do think it gets too complicated with all the new stuff. I always just considered myself bisexual. I am attracted to men and women, either being feminine, masculine, or androgenous. And i have had relationships and sex with both. That doesn't mean I am attracted to everyone. And I have boundaries in my relationships that I don't want to cross once the tone has been set. I guess then there is asexual. That one is still having trouble being accepted into a sexual community. And sometimes misunderstood. People are worried they want to convert people, but they definitely do not. But, I understand the apprehension. I watched the documentary on netflix.

KittiePerry

I'm kinda bi-curious I guess? I kissed a girl once & liked it. But I'll never find out cause I'm with the man I'll spend the rest of my days with. (hopefully/planning on it) I 100% any person in the LGBT community, hell, my sister has a girlfriend last time I checked and my aunt is a lesbian, the guy who got me and my BF together basically he is gay, I have transgender, queer, pansexual, and w.e else there is friends I'm sure I know one! 100% acceptance here. You all are human just like I am and deserve to be happy. Go be happy! And if you are in a state that allows it, go get married!

GertrudeHorse

I'm human and I like to have sex with humans. I'm not bothered which specific humans other humans like to have sex with so long as all involved are consenting adult humans. All of what you list in LBGTQ whatever it is, is part of normal human variation. I don't see the need to put people in boxes and attach labels to them based on it. I'm inclined to say you should move away from an increasingly complex labelling system and instead emphasise the whole normal human variation aspect of it. People don't need to be categorised for you to be able to fight against prejudice and hostility based on gender and/or sexuality. And additionally, while exclusive heterosexuality is considered the cultural "norm" in our society (even though biology says otherwise) it doesn't mean that exclusively heterosexual people can't also be part of the same cause and be good friends and supporters of people who have different sexual preferences.

Some of this is a really good thing to be working towards, but we sadly aren't at the point of widespread acceptance and love. Given the current climate of bigotry, many queer people find safety and community by adopting labels. Labels also give people an easy way of describing what can be a very complex yet integral part of their identity. Whilst it is well-meaning, saying "we are all humans" ends up erasing certain identities that are super-super important to the people who have them. Urgh, I'm not doing a great job of explaining what I mean there but hopefully you can understand what I'm saying.

And, yes, I agree. Allies are an important resource for the queer rights movement. Unfortunately some allies get too enthusiastic and end up talking over or shouting down the actual voices of queer people. This isn't good and is actually very harmful in the long-run. It's important that allies sit back and listen too. This sort of dynamic has happened within the queer rights movement as well, insofar as cis white gay men have become the default face of the LGBT+ movement; the voices of (in particular) queer trans women of colour are rarely heard from or valued. Anyhoo, I will stop there before I start rambling

GertrudeHorse

What's pansexual? I've never heard of it before.

As a boring heterosexual, I love hearing about others' sexualities. I like it when people are free to be themselves.

"The concept of pansexuality rejects the gender binary, the "notion of two genders and indeed of specific sexual orientations", as pansexual people are open to relationships with people who do not identify as strictly men or women."

So like, for me, I am attracted to men, women, feminine men, masculine women, androgynous types, whatever. Whoever floats my boat, basically.

I just want to add to this definition, particular in terms of distinguishing pansexuality from bisexuality.

Bisexuality is a sexual preference for two gender groups. It doesn't necessarily mean sexual preference for two specific genders, although it can for some people. For example, one bisexual person may be attracted to men and women exclusively; another bisexual person may be attracted to members of their own gender and members of 'all other genders' ('all others' being the second gender grouping). This latter definition is close to pansexuality, but pansexuals often feel that gender is not a deciding factor in their sexual attraction at all. Pansexual people are attracted to whoever they are attracted to -- and that person may have any or many gender identity/ies. In other words, it's the person not the gender that triggers their sexual preference.

Hopefully that helps makes things clearer for the person above who wasn't sure they understood.