Stupid, stubborn fat - get off me already!

Deena_Bean

Hello! I'm not really new to MFP, but I have never once posted and I have maybe 3 or 5 "friends" most of whom are not around these days (for whatever reason, I don't judge). Just wanted to jump in the pool with everyone, I guess.

I'm 35 and I have almost 10-year old twins. I've had a very long weight loss journey that started when the twins were about 2.5 years old. That year I lost 70 pounds and have been up and down since then. Usually I vary by about 10-15 pounds on the bad times, but last year I got divorced, moved, etc. and paid no attention to my waistline or exercise. I'm happy now, happier than ever with a man I adore (which also comes with a SUPER hectic schedule between our children, etc.). I like to call the divorce/separation/new love/many changes "The Big Year" (TBY) ~ as luck would have it, TBY gave me the gift of 30 extra pounds. I've lost about 15 of them and these last 15 are just stubborn as can be. So here I am poking along with the rest of you, trying to be positive and hanging in there. I get tired of always thinking about calories, but it's been working. Since March 1 I'm down 15 pounds...sounds good when I type it, but it has felt like it's been SO long lol. I'm really hoping to lose the rest or at least 10 of the 15 or so pounds by the end of June. I'm going on vacation to Mexico, so it's a goal. It's just coming off super slow now...like .2-.6 pounds per week instead of the 1.5 pounds or 2 pounds that the app tells me it should be. I'm 172.2 (5'7.5" tall) this morning...my goal is around 155 (give or take). My body seems to like 163, though, so I imagine when I finally get to that number the struggle is going to multiply. At least I know what I'm up against, I guess. Oh and I just sort of wing it with exercise. I used to be a dedicated boot-camper, but had to drop it when TBY happened. Now, I usually walk about 10 miles a week (spread out), but I really need to work on my arms...I don't love that they wave to people along with my hand
Nice to meet you all & best of luck to each of you. I've done it before, I'll do it again - and each of you fighting the fight, be proud, be strong and don't give up. Starting over sucks, so just keep going

Frinkiac

A fantastic first post.

I've also had a 'TBY' myself a few years ago, it's weird when allot of things happen in a short period of time. I remember thinking to myself back on New Years Eve - "Did all that really happen?", kinda sobering, anyway I digress.

Don't pressure yourself too much for the vacation. Just keep working at it and find new tips, methods, workouts and let the weight come off gently, just don't let it bother you too much (easier said I know). There's plenty of help and advice on the boards for nutrition, exercise and the like from posters of varying experience and training. Just about all bases are covered really.

So, welcome aboard and congratulations on your new life after TBY!

Deena_Bean

Thanks! I'm not putting too much pressure on myself - I have learned over all the years of up and down that the best way is to be patient with it. Even if you're up some one week, it'll come back off and 6 months down the road the stressing about 1 pound will seem so trivial. So I'll just keep doing the best I can and go with that. 1800-2000 calories/day is roughly my "don't gain or lose" range. My goal is around 1200/day - if I hit 1600 one or two days of the week (or even 1800-2000 one day) I just treat it as, "Well I won't be gaining, I'll just be losing a little slower for a week or so." You have to give yourself time and be patient. Celebrate the little things. I'm happy to see the end number of a pound go down by 1 (even if it only means I lost .4 that week).

I hope in the time since your own TBY you've found happiness and yourself...it was tough, for sure, and even still I sit back and thank, 'Oh my gosh, that actually all really did happen. Wow." It's surreal for sure!

Frinkiac

"Well I won't be gaining, I'll just be losing a little slower for a week or so." <-- That could of been me talking. That's exactly how I do things, you don't have to cut out everything. I'm no expert, but I'd say it's a pretty healthy way of doing things. Funnily enough I was stressing at the weekend since I only lost 1lb but I sat back and remembered the week before where I lost 6lbs, so in the end I was quite happy about the 1lb. I figured if I lost another 6lbs after the first 6lbs then I'd probrably be doing some sort of damage to myself.

I'd say the weight coming off you is about right since you are near to your goal already, those last few lbs can be a pain (or so I've heard), so just get near to it as possible. For some reason, some weeks I don't feel concious that I'm on a diet at all, I log the numbers and do the exercise but it feels like second nature and I carry on with my daily tasks as usual. I find those are the weeks that I lose the most weight, it's very odd.

Oh and yes I am kinda happy now, I will be more-so once I am at or close to my goal size. I've found during my TBY that I actually lost weight because of worries and stress, although I didn't notice it. People told me I lost weight but I've no idea if I really did, the first time I stood on scales in fifteen years was only seven weeks ago. Strange thing the human mind, eh?

Best of luck, although you don't appear to need it, you have a good frame of mind.

Kindest regards.

Deena_Bean

I'm glad to hear you're doing ok, and I think we'll ALL feel better when we're at or close to goal size.

I also stress out over some things...like extra food on Easter. So after I ate I went for like a 4 mile walk to offset it...turns out that even with the extra food over the weekend I lost .2 pounds. I'll take it!

The human mind is an amazing tool - it can sabotage you and it can be your best ally. You have to decide how to make it work for you. Be kind to yourself and all that jazz. I'm not perfect, but the more laid back I am about it all, the better I feel as a person. I try to find the pleasure it searching out healthy meals and options...and I find that it's actually quite enjoyable

Cheers