Need to get my boyfriend's support!

FireOpalCO

Well how are you trying to accommodate him? If he's not the gym type, but you're trying to drag him to the gym just as he's sitting down to watch Agents of SHIELD, he's not going to reactive positively (and really, you should both be watching Agents of SHIELD). You might be better off if you ask "hey can we go for a walk tonight after dinner" well in advance. Or planning weekend activities that keep you both active.

If he wants burgers, get the fixings to make big thick burgers at home (but with quality lower fat meat, buffalo is awesome if it's in your budget). But pair them with steamed vegetables (I love steamer bags for the microwave) and some Mrs. Dash sprinkled on top. Use sandwich thins instead of buns. If he questions these changes don't go "we both need to lose weight". Men have feelings (I swear, it's true, it's like they're people). Instead talk about how you're worried you're not getting enough fiber. Fill the house with healthy snacks and ask him to please not bring junk food into the house because you are worried about your self control (not his). My husband's response wasn't "where did my potato chips go" but "awesome, bing cherries!" (his favorite).

If you want to be really sneaky, talk about getting a dog, but only if he promises that if you take it for the morning walks, he'll take it in the evening. Get a super active breed that needs 8 miles a day.

AllieMarie2244

speaking on the boyfriends side of things...

my current bf is super skinny always has been I was probably "thick" when we got together now im just absurdly fat bc like you mentioned we got comfortable
he eats whatever he wants whenever and no limits
i on the other hand have to starve and sweat to lose weight

in the almost 3 years that we have been dating I just recently started to change everything around
I've always "wanted" to but never actually made any effort

it literally took him one day randomly asking me if I wanted to start going to the gym with him
turns out that meant him going to help me out.. literally he was there for the first week getting me on the machines and pushing me to complete the time or reps on certain things being supportive of my new diet emotionally physically financially

and now im stuck and im not giving up.. no matter if hes in the gym with me or not
I actually have made all my foods and if he wants take out i'll gladly go get him food and if there is a healthy option ill take it if not i make my own meal

maybe you can take something off my situation

hillarayray

Believe it or not I was sort of in the same boat. This is what I have found to have worked for me so far regarding my boyfriend.

We go grocery shopping and I have a list of foods I want to buy and eat, he can eat them too if he chooses, but I make it clear to him I am trying to get healthy and lose weight. At first he would be like "well I'm not the one on a diet," and that stung, but he sees now how happy I am with completing workouts and eating right and losing weight. Now he is opening up to it more because he sees me. I actually got him out on a run with me one Sunday morning.

So I would say focus on YOU at first, even though I know you are worried about him as well. Focus on you, and soon he will start seeing your changes and your happiness grow. Invite him along on a run or going to the gym or doing an at home workout video with you, and if he declines, then let it go, but you can ask him again a week or so later.

As for the eating out and you wanna cook at home, then I say you cook at home for you and let him go out and get that burger. Or you can go with him and choose a healthier option off the menu, that is what I try to do. It's about compromise, but also your health is something you are allowed to be selfish about.

Good luck!!

lilmisfit1987

I'd focus on the food. If you're making dinner every night most people are too lazy or too polite to turn it down. The better he starts eating, the better he starts feeling, and the more energy he'll have to start working out. It's the truth...I started by cutting out soda and cutting out fast food. I feel AMAZINGLY better and have so much more energy than before. If you approach this from more of a "lets get healthy and feel better" thing you'll have much more success. I wouldn't harp on him for being "obese" either. You'll just push him further away. Instead I'd tell him you are worried about his health due to his lack of energy and ask him to please just give clean eating a chance for a couple weeks atleast.

destinimac

Thanks so much for being one of the only people who didn't take it the wrong way. It's nice to know someone understands!

funnybun1

Yeah it would be nice. For the longest time I just did my own thing. My guy started to notice that my body shape was changing - getting smaller and then he got interested in doing exercise/better food too.

Like another person said....work on you and the rest will follow.

jimwon953

Yeah - that happens. It happened when I moved in with my girlfriend and over a couple of years we piled on 2 stone each - we've both done really well in dropping.

Basically, weight-loss kind of means you have to break the eating together habit a little bit. So next times he wants to go get a burger you say 'OK. I'm staying here and making myself a salad so I'll see you when you get back'. Then it's his choice to go out and get the burger if he want's too, or stay in with you and get a salad.

Also, when grocery shopping, you stop buying any fattening or snacky foods. Then it will be his choice to go and get them if he wants to.