Question about SO support....

_KitKat_
_KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So my husband has always been supportive with really anything I want to do but even he surprised me last night. My husband is fit and has been very supportive with my weight loss but normally he is pretty indifferent to MFP and calorie count. This is normally fine with me, why would he care. Here is where he surprised me though...While making dinner last night we couldn't decide what to make. I logged 1 dinner when we planned and had to un-log because we changed our mind, this happened a few times in a row. He found it amusing and was joking around with me, when my youngest out of nowhere starting making fun of my logging. She was asking why do you care? and that just seems silly and so on. The surprise came when my husband turned around and told her "it's important to mom, that is why it matters". It was a small thing but it felt really good, even with all his support I assumed he thought the logging was silly too. I am a lucky girl :love:

Oh...The question.....Have any of you been surprised by your SO's support or lack of?

Replies

  • sfbaumgarten
    sfbaumgarten Posts: 912 Member
    Love it! I remember being surprised when I came home from work to find my SO was cooking me a nice dinner and he already had all the nutritional info figured for me :smooched: He does this every time he cooks now and I couldn't appreciate it more!
  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    That is GREAT! I am so glad to see others have such great men or women, sometimes the good ones get no mention because everyone is more focus on the bad ones.
  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
    Nice. Hubby & I are in this together, but not really. What I mean is we each have our own weight loss goals - but are very different about how we go about it. Partially because he needs more calories per day than me, and because he can lose weight 'easier'. (He's lost more in less time and with less effort, but oh well!)

    Anyhow - his way of supporting me means he weighs, measures ingredients when he cooks so I can know per serving calories. I log everything to track all macros but he thinks that is too complicated. So when he cooks, I enter quick calories. But he does make an effort to be very accurate for my sake, while he doesn't need it so much.

    And I support him by not nagging when I think he needs to eat more. He has high days, and some that are lower, so it all washes out in the end.
  • kandell
    kandell Posts: 473 Member
    My boyfriend just agreed to start the P90x program with me :3 And he's also been working on making healthier eating choices. I couldn't be more excited! Most of my diet fails happen because he and I have gone out for dinner to not-so-diet-friendly places. I'm just super excited that he's going to support me and work on this with me ^w^
  • Angurla
    Angurla Posts: 159 Member
    That is amazing.!Over the years my hubby has attempted to help me but it generally results in frustration. He has enough discipline for both of us. And I have none. When I told him about MFP and how it works he said "That's great. You have to find out what works for you." Normally he tries to us his plan for me and doesn't get it. Im so proud of him for finally getting it. And it actually motivates me a little more knowing he isn't pushing me.
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
    My boyfriend surprised me one day by making lunch and having a table set up outside when I came home for lunch from work. The best part was, he asked me to look under my napkin. Under the napkin, he had placed a sheet of paper with the calorie count and nutrition facts for everything he had made, so I could log it easily! It was awesome.
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    My daughter is 15, knows everything, and is very militant about body acceptance issues (this began before I even started trying to lose weight and get healthy). She once gave me some grief about logging dinner and how I need to love myself, and my husband jumped in to remind her that just like other people can be happy with letting their bodies be, I can also be happy by choosing to make my body different. It's just a different kind of love. Awwww...

    Granted, he'll take just about any opportunity to contradict her these days, and vice versa, because they are the same person in different bodies and heaven only knows how I'm going to survive in between these two for the next few years! Someone get me a striped shirt and a whistle! LOL!
  • JustSomeEm
    JustSomeEm Posts: 20,283 MFP Moderator
    Love this. :) Thanks for sharing!
  • mshopey
    mshopey Posts: 125 Member
    That's lovely. And it is nice to see, the forums are full of unsupportive spouses. My husband is still getting loads of crap, but I know he's super proud of how well I'm doing. And he's told me he's going to take me to Greece next year for my birthday as a goal and a well done for doing so well. Which is not only pretty amazing, but it helps keep me on track, knowing I'll be on the beach looking good, and I need to be healthier to walk up the stairs at the waterpark we'll be visiting while we're there.
    My husband is my rock, even with his crappy food addiction :p
  • jlynnm70
    jlynnm70 Posts: 460 Member
    my hubby helps me with the cooking and is pretty good about helping me make 'alternatives' for what he and the kids eat.

    He tries to help with the exercise thing, and if I want to do things at home, he is real supportive, not so much about me leaving and going to the gym tho. Frustrating.

    I take what I can get.
  • Mygsds
    Mygsds Posts: 1,564 Member
    I have lost over 50 lbs before coming here . When I was heavier , my ex husband hounded me constantly which made me crazy, stressed and just could not get a handle on it. Well, four years later I remarried a WONDERFUL man. We ran into my ex at a wedding and I had then lost the 50 lbs plus and my ex stood there and stared at me. My husband walked up to him and said "BIG MISTAKE" Just like Julie Roberts... God love him. He has helped me re do recipes to continue on this path and soooo supportive. I am so blessed.
  • Chezzie84
    Chezzie84 Posts: 873 Member
    My SO is very supportive. I could not ask for any more from him.
    I think the fact my ultimate motivation is to lose weight before I get pregnant is a big motivator for him to be supportive.
  • Mygsds
    Mygsds Posts: 1,564 Member
    My boyfriend surprised me one day by making lunch and having a table set up outside when I came home for lunch from work. The best part was, he asked me to look under my napkin. Under the napkin, he had placed a sheet of paper with the calorie count and nutrition facts for everything he had made, so I could log it easily! It was awesome.
    That is true love... Good for you
  • Chezzie84
    Chezzie84 Posts: 873 Member
    My daughter is 15, knows everything

    All teenagers know everything, they have been everywhere, seen everything and yet experienced nothing lol
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    My husband has always been supportive of what I want to do, but sometimes he forgets what exactly I'm doing at the moment :tongue:
  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    I love all the responses, I actually only included "lack of" support in my question because that is what I was worried I would see more of, based on the normal forum postings.
  • SemperAnticus1643
    SemperAnticus1643 Posts: 703 Member
    My ex husband was never really supportive. Anytime he seen me logging my food or weighing my food he would have some smart remark. He never wanted to go with me to the gym but complained about lack of quality time. He was very insecure and was worried that I was going to lose weight find someone else. Same thing happened when I went back to school. He was afraid I was going to start seeing a man with a college degree who also makes more money and leave him.

    Needless to say, I didn't leave him for a gym rat of a man or a man with a degree. :)
  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    My husband has always been supportive of what I want to do, but sometimes he forgets what exactly I'm doing at the moment :tongue:

    I love this!
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    I always looked for my husband's approval. I rarely got it. Once my changes became visible, he claimed I should've listened to him all along, which is funny because I was doing everything he said not to do (lifting, eating carbs). After a while, I didn't care what he thought about anything and gave him the boot.

    He was the easiest weight I ever lost.
  • jeffininer
    jeffininer Posts: 204 Member
    Not only great support, but also backing mom and showing your kids the importance of support and not poking fun :) All about the teaching moment!!

    My husband is so amazing and supportive. He doesn't poke fun, he encourages me to eat well and go to the gym. He does the whole nightly routine with the kids so I can go to the gym. He puts up with my change in cooking the meals and going after more healthy ingredients. He's even switched to turkey and chicken sausage instead of regular pork sausage. So he's starting to make small changes in himself.

    Support is not NECESSARY for success, but it sure does help along the way :)
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    My husband has always been supportive of what I want to do, but sometimes he forgets what exactly I'm doing at the moment :tongue:

    I love this!

    :flowerforyou: :heart:

    He's a champ. He has his bad day, to be sure, but he mostly goes with my flow. He's my best buddy too!
  • rak173
    rak173 Posts: 105 Member
    This is such a happy post! Love all the positivity!!!!

    My SO is also eating healthy and trying to lose weight, but doesn't use mfp or see the need for it. Things work differently for everyone and we both accept that. We often take turns making dinner and he always calorie counts for me when it is his turn.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    I was taken aback a bit when I heard Hubby bragging about my weight loss and running a couple years ago. I mean, I knew he was proud of me but when friends stopped by that we hadn't seen in a while, he'd make sure to point it out like - check her out, isn't she doing great?! She's doing a 5k next week too!

    I haven't made any great strides in a while so I'm not hearing it so much anymore but he's still my best cheerleader - convinces me to go out for a walk/run when I don't feel like it and asks me how my workouts are going once in a while.

    He's also recently started bragging about our food choices. We're not exactly the healthiest eaters I know (especially compared to some of my friends who do all clean/organic) but once he saw what some of his friends were stocking in their kitchens, he realized we do pretty good - especially compared to how we used to eat!
  • knt6742
    knt6742 Posts: 36
    This is definitely a great post. My boyfriend doesn't really get the whole calorie counting thing. He is naturally really slim and he's really fit and active. But he's super supportive of me working out and trying to eat healthier. Though I do get tired of him trying to get me to go running...
  • lindsey1979
    lindsey1979 Posts: 2,395 Member
    I'm very lucky that my fiance is so supportive. In fact, he was the driving force behind me figuring out some of my issues when calorie counting wasn't working on its own. We also lift together, do hill sprints together and walk and hike together a lot. I find having a partner to do it with to be so incredibly helpful as there were certainly times I wouldn't have pushed myself as hard or even done some workouts without him saying "let's go!" And, I like to think, the help is mutual. We also eat very similarly (though he eats a LOT more), so that's really helpful as there aren't a lot of temptations in house as he can tolerate a lot more in calories and carbs than I can.
  • 120by30
    120by30 Posts: 217 Member
    My husband bought a treadmill and weight bench for me. He put the treadmill together for me after he came home from work in the middle of the night because he knew how badly I wanted to use it. He has resisted his urge to bring home Krispy Kreme donuts because he realizes I have very little willpower. His eyes never glaze over when I mention something about my weight or MFP. He helps hold the measuring tape level when I'm checking for inches lost. I could go on and on. Yeah, he's a sweetheart. No, no one else can have him.
  • willrun4bagels
    willrun4bagels Posts: 838 Member
    When we go out to dinner, my SO generally lets me pick where we go, so that I can pick somewhere with a meal that will generally fit into my calories for that day. He's not really a picky eater, so he's always cool with wherever I suggest.

    He also totally gets woken up by my super early wake-up time for the gym, but never complains or gets mad that I woke him up like 2-3 hours before his normal wake-up time. He's a keeper :love:
  • beachylove
    beachylove Posts: 137 Member
    I have been very lucky, my husband has also been tracking using MFP as he wanted to shed some pounds. He and I workout together daily and he helps with picking out smart food choices. I love having him behind me on this since he knows how hard I have struggled in the past and knows that I want to make sustainable changes that will keep me on this path. :)
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Love it! I remember being surprised when I came home from work to find my SO was cooking me a nice dinner and he already had all the nutritional info figured for me :smooched: He does this every time he cooks now and I couldn't appreciate it more!

    My husband does this frequently too, and I love it!

    He has been supportive from Day One. He didn't join MFP himself until I'd been on the site for 9 or 10 months but now he does it too...I started it with almost 100 lb to lose and he is just losing 25 or so but he likes it and "gets it". He thinks it's a very useful tool.
  • PJPrimrose
    PJPrimrose Posts: 916 Member
    My ex was a drag. He told me I was fat (not), then skinny fat (nope) then started running around like his pants were afire. I told him to "keep running" and left.

    My wonderful DH is following my example for getting in shape mostly. He was the one who found MFP for me when I only had to lose a few pounds for kick boxing. He started using it himself. He has bigger weight issues. We both cook healthy, go to the gym and take walks.

    I'm training him. I was afraid to help him with his weight/work out. I finally agreed reluctantly. I was afraid it would lead to marital conflict. I was happy he wanted to get in shape but not at the cost of a happy marriage!

    I lost my weight rather quickly. HIs weight is stubborn, fluctuates a lot, and leaves him discouraged :frown: He hates the gym and dieting is difficult for him. I wish he was happier with his body as-is. It's almost like he's at war with it!

    I like reading stories about folks who struggle and how their husbands and SOs help them without being overwhelming. I hope I can be as helpful to my DH as your spouses and partners are to you! I appreciate the tips on how to help him. Thank you!

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