Having one of those days.

morning_joy

I am 225 pounds. I am so tired of this body that can't do what I want it to do. I am tired of getting breathless when I am doing laundry and going up and down the stairs. I am tired of getting breathless when I go on my hike in the mornings. I have been working at taking this weight off since I put it on 18 years ago. I am tired of people looking at me and thinking ... she would be so much prettier if she just lost some weight. I am so tired of people suggesting diet plans and fitness regimes especially when they don't know that I have tried everything out there. I have worked out for 10 hours a week for a period of six months. I have worked with doctors and taken weight loss medications. I have had a personal trainer. I know how to be healthy. I eat a very healthy diet.

I have come to accept that this process is going to be a long one for me. I abused my body for over 20 years purging on a daily basis. I know that I have a great deal of healing to do and on most days I am willing to put in that work. But every so often, I get in this mood where I just want to be able to enjoy delicious food or take a couple of days off from working out or put on a sexy dress again. I want men to look when I walk in the room again. I want people to look at the person I am and not make judgments...get to know me and my journey before they suggest yet another diet plan.

I want this weight to come off. I want all the work I put in to show on the scale. I want, I want, I want!

Sorry...truly a whiny day for me.

kamakazeekim

I can totally empathize. I'm not "going to say hang in there it gets easier" or anything else like that....I hate when people say it to me. Some people are cursed with a crappy hand when it comes to losing weight...science has proven it. Feel free to add me and we can do this together

redhotsc

You are a beautiful woman. With the help of your health care professionals and your friends (and strangers) on this site, you can achieve your goals. But more importantly, you have to believe that you are beautiful. You are worthy. You were made for more. I am certain that if you look at your life and all of the people that you touch and influence everyday, you will see how precious you are. You are right, it took your lengthy path to get wherever it is that you are now. But you are taking the steps to have a journey learning yourself as you become en even more spectacular version of who you already are. I wish you the very best on this journey. You are more than welcome to friend me if you would like. Either way, know that you are beautiful. Find a way to sparkle, even when you don't feel like it! Shine like a star!!!