Should I really be this upset, or am I just overreacting?

LotusF1ower

To the OP, I just saw your photos on your profile and I am not kidding when I say I can definitely see a difference!!!

Don't let it upset you when people do not comment on your weightloss or appear to notice.

45lbs is a hell of a lot of weight, how many dress sizes have you come down, a few I'd wager for sure. Just continue to do what you are doing as it is obviously working. Eventually, everybody will notice as it will be impossible for them not to.

(For what it's worth, I agree with you that it is nice for people to notice. If they don't say anything, I presume you are taking it for granted that it looks like you have lost nothing, but you couldn't be further from the truth. Many people wander around all day with what appears to be open eyes, but they are really shut and they are not very aware, just keep going) xxx

kelsully

I am sure that was quite frustrating. Question...do your clothes fit your new body or are you in baggy stuff waiting to finish losing before you get new clothes? A neighbor of mine lost nearly 40 pounds. I knew she was losing and was pleased for her but I didn't notice it myself until she broke down and started wearing more flattering clothes. She was hiding out in her baggy stuff and I really couldn't tell. Her clothes fit her now and it is remarkable how many people comment on her weight loss ...weight she lost last year and no one noticed until her clothes fit. just a thought
keep up your hard work and don't worry about who notices and who doesn't.

andy13

As she is your best friend she probably looks at your soul and not your body.

CreativeRedhead

Yeah, I wouldn't stress over it. She maybe says you look awesome when others ask.

eva512

I just looked at your photos. If no one noticed you lost weight, their blind or jealous:bigsmile: You look awsome:smokin:

ZebraHead

Hi - I creeped your profile and found this pic (hope you don't mind me posting it here):



I can see two very different pictures of you here. Maybe the people you are around all the time just get used to seeing you everyday and 'subtle' changes are not apparent to them. (show them some of these pics. :happy: )

I think you are doing fine, and you are definitely showing the weight loss from what I can see. Be proud, and keep doing what your doing, you're on the right track.

If that is you behind the flame in your main pic, I would like to see you in that pic too, you look alot thinner there.
:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
BTW I'll have what Charmagne is drinking please!

Cytherea

LOL, lots of responses, so we'll see if I can cover it all in one post!

First of all, obviously I am doing this for myself and no one else, and obviously I don't need the attention. As I stated, I have NEVER gotten upset when somebody didn't notice, and that includes my husband, who sees me everyday and can't tell a difference unless he looks at pics. Doesn't bother me at all. I just felt a bit slighted because how is it possible that she noticed SUCH a huge difference in him (and it has only been 2 months!) and not in me (and it has been 10 months)?!

I definitely think that she sees my soul and not my body- as a good friend does. But that doesn't necessarily mean that you don't notice differences, does it? I mean, she notices when I cut my hair, so what's the difference? lol

The thing about the particular situation with her is that she DOESN'T see me all the time. As I said, I've seen her a total of 4 times over the past year. I live across the country from where I grew up so the only person that sees me on a regular basis is my husband. My point about her was that she has seen me more often than others, she came out here to visit me, so she probably has the best view because she's seen me at different points along the road at different amounts of weight lost.

I have some clothes that I still wear that are definitely too big but some that fit really nice too. I work at a college and I need to look professional so I've had to buy a few things along the way that fit nicely instead of waiting until I'm done losing. I actually did wear my newest, tightest fitting shirt (which I absolutely love) while she was here so she has seen me in some clothes that do fit well (and really show off the weight loss, as far as I'm concerned).

It isn't like I TOLD her I was mad or got angry with her. I just felt insulted, slighted, about the whole thing.

I don't think she's jealous. She's tall and skinny and always has been, and she's very athletic, and always has been. Her whole family is tall and skinny and I don't think she even has any fat on her body to lose if she wanted to. Sure, people don't always see that about themselves, but she's not the type of person to care about her looks and obsess over her weight. She's healthy, she eats in moderation and fairly well, and she goes to the gym frequently and plays all kinds of sports for fun. She doesn't have any self-esteem issues. She just isn't that type of person to care or be insecure about herself and she never has been.

I understand that sometimes commenting on weight loss is a sticky subject. But her and I are totally open and honest with each other about everything. We tell each other when we're being stupid, we don't hold back anything. She knows that I've been trying to lose weight and she knows that I would NEVER be insulted by her telling me the truth- about anything. So it isn't an uncomfortable subject for us. As for my professors, the reason why I thought for sure that one of them would say anything was because, like I said, he has commented in the past on the significant weight loss that another close friend of ours lost, so I know he doesn't think it is an awkward topic or unprofessional (and if it were, I'm not his student anymore, I'm his friend, so that isn't an issue anyways).

For those that asked- I started at a size 20 and I'm now in a 14. I haven't weighed this little since high school.

Yeah, the pics on my profile are me (other than the ones of my cats, obviously! lol)- they are kinda small on here, unfortunately. I don't really know how to make them look any bigger. I put together those before and after pictures recently- we went to an event last year and again this year and I knew the same people would be there so I tried to recreate the pictures. I even wore the same exact outfit!

Thanks to all of you who are so encouraging and for all the compliments! I appreciate it muchly.