How do you restart for what seems like the hundredth time?

so_many_ideas

I have been telling myself for YEARS that I could do this. I have started and restarted calorie counting and exercising and have eventually given up every time. I gained 20lbs back in the past 4 months! I HATE doing this to myself. I know how unhealthy I am, and I know how unhappy I am with my body, but I just can't seem to bring myself to get off the couch or eat healthy. Has anyone been in this situation before? Has anyone been in this situation and been successful? I'm starting to worry that I'll never be able to reach or maintain my goal.

cuinboston2014

So many of us have been in that position. Some of us still are. The "key" to getting out of it is you. You just have to do it. But you have to know why you want to lose weight and be healthier and it has to be more than just one superficial goal. one of my goals is to be able to wear a bikini, but I have a million goals along the way.

I lost 100 pounds after telling myself for years that I would start Monday or I would eat this and not eat that. One day it just clicked. I saw a video of myself and I looked so absolutely disgusting that I could not imagine that was even me. I tried to blame it on the video quality but I couldn't fool myself.

Why have you given up in the past? Most people need to make small changes. Change your diet first or start walking first. You don't need to jump in head first if that hasn't worked for you in the past. Break it down into little chunks and remember that your decisions are made constantly. Just because you ate a big breakfast doesn't mean you throw the whole day away. You still get the make the decisions for the rest of the day and can get on track. And just because you are off track for a day or a week, even a month, ti doesn't mean it's hopeless. Get back on and keep going

Cortneyrenee04

I start over every day. I know I can only control what happens today- not yesterday or tomorrow. Every morning is a new fresh start, so just tell yourself you have to make good choices just for one day, today.

You can definitely do it. Go for a walk instead of watching tv. Eat the same things, just a little less, and add in some veggies. Start small so you don't get overwhelmed. I still have a long way to go... I mess up every day, but a lot less than I used to!

SuperC_85

I start over every day. I know I can only control what happens today- not yesterday or tomorrow. Every morning is a new fresh start, so just tell yourself you have to make good choices just for one day, today.

SOOO True!

Cortneyrenee04

I agree- no "all or nothing" days! It's hard to shift your mind that way, but it helps so much when you realize each meal is an opportunity to make a good choice!

I did the same thing when I saw pictures. I told myself that they were just bad pictures, I didn't really look like that.... glad to know I wasn't the only one!

George_Baileys_Ghost

You can't start starting until you stop stopping. Quit looking at failures as ending points, and more like speed bumps. They don't stop you, they just slow you down for a bit. Get over them and keep moving forward without stopping.

elisethepoet

I think we all need to find our own best motivation.

For example: I desperately want to start a family but my weight is a complication that I can't afford. When I started loosing it was with that goal, and that goal only, in mind. However, as soon as I committed to the yoga classes (paying money always help me feel obligated), and started to see my body change I knew I would stick with it. I have gone down two pant sizes and my husband is always complimenting my hard work.

Perhaps you should ask yourself what will motivate you long term?

Whenever I wonder whether its worth it I look at my progress and then break my big goals down into smaller goals. Can I log for a week straight? Can I walk two miles three days this week?

Also I set my calorie goal high when I first started and slowly tightened it down from 1700 to 1500 to 1400 to 1300. I also slowly increased my exercise from a few times a week to 5-6 times per week. Find a class you love and commit to it. Start small and build!

All the best!
-e

Lonestar5775

I start over every day. I know I can only control what happens today- not yesterday or tomorrow. Every morning is a new fresh start, so just tell yourself you have to make good choices just for one day, today.

^^^Smart person is she, kind and wise.

PlunderBunneh

First off, stop telling yourself you can't do this. Done? Okay, now I'll talk.
The first time I started losing weight was about five years ago, and one of the big things I've learned is that it is never the same for everyone, and for most of us, it will always be a three steps forward, one back, two forward, two back, three forward, and so forth. Just because you slipped up doesn't mean it's the end, or that you failed. It just means that you find your motivation, whether it's the same as it was or a new one, and you get back on the horse working towards it.

The hardest thing is to not fall into the pity cycle. I bought a house in August and life got crazy, and then had a hip issue get bad enough that I couldn't work out and had to schedule surgery, and am recovering from that surgery at the moment. In October, when I noticed I had gained fifteen pounds, I told myself there just wasn't anything I could do about it. So I ate whatever I wanted, and I didn't move even on the days I could have. And guess what? Over the course of the next four months, I gained even more. I went from 16 pounds from my goal to 55. Youch, that hurts to admit.

But I knew what was happening. I treated what could have just been a 15 pounds set back as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, and I gained even more. The thing is, you can't just put this sort of thing on hold and expect to stay the same weight. Not when you treat that hold as a reason to indulge in everything you've cut out.

Does that mean I'm giving up? Hell no. I'm still down 71 pounds from where I was five years ago, and I can get where I want again. I'm back in the right mind frame, with fresh inspiration and a fresh attitude. I can do this, I know I can, but it's up to me to hold myself accountable. I can't exercise yet (I'm only 7 weeks out from hip surgery) but I can pay attention and start food logging. I'm only a week or two back to paying attention, and already down 6 pounds.

More good news: When you regain weight, it comes off easier the sooner you address it.

Set yourself up with short term goals, and rewards for them. And most of all, don't sweat the small stuff. Take pride in every little step you take, and don't obsess when you fall down. We all fall down. It's life. Just get back up, and start taking small steps again.
Make use of the community. Go read the success stories, join a challenge group, read some blogs from the hundreds of us in the same exact place you are. Find an accountability buddy. Keep your head high, and don't let anyone, especially not you, tell you that you can't do this.
You can do this. Pinkie promise, you've got what it takes.

GBrady43068

I have been telling myself for YEARS that I could do this. I have started and restarted calorie counting and exercising and have eventually given up every time. I gained 20lbs back in the past 4 months! I HATE doing this to myself. I know how unhealthy I am, and I know how unhappy I am with my body, but I just can't seem to bring myself to get off the couch or eat healthy. Has anyone been in this situation before? Has anyone been in this situation and been successful? I'm starting to worry that I'll never be able to reach or maintain my goal.

I have now lost 39 pounds since last October. What has worked for me is the following:
1) Ban the word "diet". A diet is something you struggle with, hate every second of, and abandon once you reach some arbitrary weight goal. This time, focus on making changes to your eating that you can STICK with. It is ridiculous for the majority of us to believe your lips will never again touch potato chips, pizza or ice cream. You have to think more in terms of "How do I work out my day so that I can have this ("No-no food here") without it killing my day overall?"
2) If you have a gym at your workplace (many do), start to use it. Plan to go down there on break and walk on the treadmill or use the elliptical for 5 minutes. If you do 5 minutes on each break and another 10 out of a half-hour lunch, that is 20 minutes a day, 5 days a week. This was how I started and if you maintain your healthy calorie deficit, you will start to see results.
3) Weight loss goal should be set at about 1-2 pounds a week if you have a lot to lose, .5 to 1 pound a week if you only want to lose around 20 pounds or less.
4) If you have a calorie overage one day....try again the next day. And to be honest, my experience has been that it takes a really AWFUL day (as in well over 1000 calories over goal) to kill a week if you're on target the rest of the time.
5) Don't overdo it with the scale. Honestly, I would pick a day and only weigh once a week on that day. If you weigh with no shoes, do it that way everytime. If you weigh with shoes on, wear 'em. Just do it a consistent day/time/method.
6) Unless you have a medical reason, don't obsess too much over whether you went over on a particular macro (I.e. carbs) unless you're also exceeding total calories again and again.
7) That having been said, overconsume on sodium and you'll retain water...so if the scale isn't moving and all else is happening (you're logging, coming in at a moderate deficit and exercising) check to see you aren't eating too much salt.
8) And even if it seems counterintuitive, drink more water...that tends to help with weight loss in general...

NS81

You just keep trying... I've done that so many times, but this time, I finally got sick of myself, and have gotten further in this weight loss journey than I ever have in 6.5 yrs... Always a struggle, but you just keep trying! Good luck!

NadiaMayl

So many good responses in here already!!! You are obviously still at it, which is a won battle already!! I've started so many times i've lost count! But I'm not giving up... I don't know what will happen tomorrow, what my mood will be like in a month, when I'l have to move again, or face an unforeseen event which will throw me off my game again... but TODAY, I am choosing to be in control, I am choosing to tell those 'crazy roller coasters' off and just accept that life is crazy, and I should not let it get in the way of what should be a life habit: Healthy Choices!!
Today, you are choosing to be here and ask for ideas, support, and encouragement!! Give yourself credit for that and chose today to be a successful one in whichever your goals are!!!!