Is this bad?

lina1131

Man, some of the things my child will notice is unreal. She is turning 4 years old next week.

I do watch what I eat and tend to choose healthier options most of the time. We do not eat out a lot (and I mean as a family if we go out to eat it's like once every 3 months, if that). So we cook healthier food at home for dinner. With that being said, I realize she is a child and while I do not allow her to have crap every single day, she is allowed to have treats. But, we do not buy soda for the house, nothing like kool aide or cheetos. If I buy the occasional chips it is the baked tortilla chips i do buy the Dreyers fruit Popsicles because my husband and daughter love them.

Okay so the point is, we try to eat healthy at home, but we also don't freak out over the treats or whatever.

My husband just sent me a text that said

"Lilliana just asked me how many calories is in the Popsicle"

My natural reaction was to laugh, but it made me wonder....she's only 4...I don't want her to think about that stuff. And, most likely she isn't really concerned about calories, she probably doesn't even know what a calorie is. I bet she just remembers me talking about calories in food because I read ALL labels.

RIGHT? I am not damaging my child am I?

AsaThorsWoman

I worry about the same thing, my 4ft tall 48 lb six year old thinks she needs to loose weight. Yesterday she grabbed my back fat and said "Mom, you have fat rolls on your back, but you are getting skinnier..." "Thanks."

gemzy24

I wouldnt say this was bad like you say she still has her treats and u dont freak out at the thought of them and at that age they do copy alot so like you say she prob doesnt have a clu what calories are ahe is just mimicing you plus i dont see it damaging a child by teaching them healthy yet responsible ways of life just my thoughts :-)

chrissyh

I don't think it's bad for kids to be aware of what they are eating-I wish I would have started mine long ago. I agree if it's a freak out type event then I'd worry.

kennedar

Of course you are not damaging your child. At 4, she has no concept of what a calorie is. However, "they" (I can not find the source at the moment) have shown that children start to develop a preference for "slim people" as young as 3. Does your daughter here you talking about your weight issues a lot? I might try to restrict that type of talk around her for a while and make sure you are only using positive terms to talk about people, including yourself. But at the end of the day, she is 4. Unless you have serious food problems or are actively restricting her calories, I doubt you have anything to worry about. It sounds like she has just heard it mentioned and knows its something that mommy worries about.

Take all that for what it is worth. I am not a mom yet, but I have done a ton of reading on self esteem issues in children. It sounds like you are a wonderful mom who is making sure your daughter is raised with a healthy relationship with food. I would not worry if it was our family!

swtally80

My kids bring up strange things they overhear about my eating, exercise and such. I don't think its damaging I think she is most likely testing a word she often hears you use. As long as you are healthy eating and not extreme, she may pick up on the habits and knowledge early in life... which would be good. My sister and I had a very hard time finding a healthy balance in dieting and exercise, after watching and listening to our mom (indulging and dieting cycle). Just saying, she is only 4 and I am sure its not the beginning of anything serious.

tishieb

I assure you it's not " you " putting that into your Daughter's head ... Look at the media today, it's insane. Check the magazine racks and every other commercial on the TV .. all of which have the secrets to losing weight ... and adverts that have the " it's only 100 calories " thing going on .... It's everywhere you look. Besides, you can just explain to her perhaps that there are 2 different types of eaters out there. The ones that do not care about their health and eat religiously at fast food restaurants and those who are creative and cook and care about putting healthy whole foods into your body. Explain, the better the foods, the better the body runs and tell her that THAT is what you are trying to do. Hope some of my thoughts were helpful Cheers and best of luck to you and everyone here on their goals !

GorillaNJ

Does your daughter go to pre-school? I know calories was something both of my boys started talking about once they were in school. They have "health lessons" about junk food and calories right in the first week.

Now they are both in school 2nd grade and Kindergarten... and they cannot bring in unhealthy snacks at all. Not that my wife really gave them any but one of the kids in class had a problem because his grandmother kept packing cookies for him, and the teacher had to keep taking them away and giving the kid a piece of fruit.

ChubbieTubbie

I have the same fears for my daughters (ages 7, 7, and almost-5). When I was 9 years old, I asked my mom if I was fat and she told me that I was. She cried and told me it was really hard to answer that truthfully, but we'd 'work on it together'. Looking back at my pictures, I was nowhere near fat. I was very muscular from dancing, and I had a little bit of chubbiness, but by no means was I 'fat'. I went on my first diet at 9, and yo-yo'd for the rest of my life. I work really hard to keep the weight off, and my oldest is very lean and athletic and she loves junk food. The other day she asked if we could have McD's for dinner and I told her no and she threw a hissy fit over it and finally I just told her "Look, that sort of food is why Mommy is so fat, and you don't want to be fat like Mommy, do you?". :frown: Not the best approach. I have since talked to all three of my girls about healthy foods and unhealthy foods and snacks in moderation and what needs to be done to keep their bodies running optimally. Since I quit taking everyone out to eat all the time things have been a really rough transition for all of us.

The main point, I guess, is that it's good to educate your children about nutrition, but it's bad to focus on it "too much". Tell your children they're beautiful and perfect and then teach them what they should put in their bodies and they should be fine.

NutritionDivaRD

I am on the brink of starting an exciting career as a dietitian (have to pass my exam still) and my passion is KIDS and nutrition! I don't think you are damaging her at ALL! Teach her about nutrition. She should know what a calorie is. And its okay for her to ask. Be sure to encourage her that a variety of healthy choices is more the focus than calories though. Lots of fruits and veggies because they have so many nutrients. Most of the time when I have taught at schools, kids know very little about nutrition. But last year I got to help some other nutrition interns set up a booth at an elementary school for a symposium. We gave each group a short (8 minutes or so) lecture about the food groups, played a game about food groups, and helped the kids make two healthy snacks (homemade snack mix and ants on a log). I was AMAZED at how much those little ones knew about the food groups. It got me so excited to see that THEY were excited! Knowledge is a good thing. But so is knowing that popsicles and other treats are acceptable in moderation. You've probably also taught her about the importance of exercise and being active. Its all about balance! Just make sure she knows that!

I think you are doing a good job. Just don't focus on one thing. Balance, balance, balance. If enough moms start following this outlook then perhaps childhood obesity will start to decrease. *sigh*....I just love kids to pieces!

lina1131

I tell my daughter she is perfect all the time (well, because she is :bigsmile: ) and I allow her a cookie at the mall or if we are out to eat, she can order what she wants on the menu. She sees me eating healthy, but I also do not deprive myself. Mamma is gonna have an ice cream or spaghetti every once in a while, you know? :laugh: So I am definitely not extreme, BUT I do take her out with me for walks (because it's nice to get fresh air and be outside, not because I want her to exercise) and she does watch the biggest loser with me.

Is it bad that she watches the biggest loser with me?

It is SO hard to know if you are doing the right thing or not by your children. Usually I am very confident in my mommy skills, but sometimes I just stop and wonder "crap, am I traumatizing her for life by doing <insert whatever here>"

JoyceJoanne

When my girls were little and started repeating or copying my attitude, I had to change my wording. ie instead of asking if I 'look fat 'in this- I would pick two outfits and say 'which one looks better'. I no longer used the words 'calories/fat' instead I used 'healthier' or 'not the best choice'. I did NOT want my daughters growing up having issues with their bodies (at age 4 and 6!!!!). They chose snacks that we had in the house (healthier options) but I wasn't a fanatic about it. If we were out someplace, they chose what they felt like eating. Both of my girls have VERY healthy body images, neither are unhealthy. I am happy with the choices that I made.
You have do what works best for you and your family. :flowerforyou:

ErinMarie25

My daughter is 1, but I do worry that in the future. Especially since daughter pretty much wants to mimic mom.

My friends daughter says the same things to her. How many calories is that, that. She asked how many calories were in the broccoli they ate for dinner the other day. She even started trying to workout with her, which I think that part is great! She is a few years older, 6 or 7.

lina1131

She also always helps me make dinner. Her job is to tear up the lettuce for our salad. We talk about veggies and how they are good for you. And, I always offer her fruit in the morning.

I am trying to keep things balanced for her to where she is aware of nutritious food but then allow her to be a 4 year old, you know?

Side story: Last week we were at Target in the drink aisle. I was grabbing some Ozarka Sparkling water for the husband which happens to be across the aisle from the Kool-Aide. I think Kool-aide is nasty and I refuse to allow my daughter to drink it. She has asked me a couple of times and I just tell her "We do not drink Kool-aide, it is not good for you". So this little girl and her dad were getting some kool-aide and my daughter screams to me in the middle of the aisle 'Oh NO MOMMY LOOOOOOK, we do not drink kool-aide it is BAD FOR YOU".

I wanted to die. :laugh: :laugh: :grumble:

ErinMarie25

Hahaha, too cute!

TheNewJessieMae

I dont' think it's bad. I have a six year old daughter. She will ask me that question-only because she has heard me say it. She has NO idea what that means. BUT she knows the difference in JUNK and HEALTHY foods. She asks a lot of questions. Which I think is good. We also cook healthy meals at the house but I don't care if they have some ice cream or chips. they don't get to load up on them, but they can have them from time to time. I see it as educations.

ALSOOOOO the big part of mine and my daughters relationship is that she knows I'm overweight. She will comment about me being jiggley and so on. Only because she's heard me say it. I CONSTANTLY LET HER KNOW THAT SHE IS PERFECT. She is a growing girl and every square inch of her is exactly the way its supposed to be. IF she EVER says anything about her jeans being tight because her tummy is growing............ I NIP it in the bud at that very second and tell her-no your whole body is growing, just as it's supposed to at your age. Mom is done growing, and I am a woman. That's the difference. She tends to understand.

NutritionDivaRD

She also always helps me make dinner. Her job is to tear up the lettuce for our salad. We talk about veggies and how they are good for you. And, I always offer her fruit in the morning.

I am trying to keep things balanced for her to where she is aware of nutritious food but then allow her to be a 4 year old, you know?

Side story: Last week we were at Target in the drink aisle. I was grabbing some Ozarka Sparkling water for the husband which happens to be across the aisle from the Kool-Aide. I think Kool-aide is nasty and I refuse to allow my daughter to drink it. She has asked me a couple of times and I just tell her "We do not drink Kool-aide, it is not good for you". So this little girl and her dad were getting some kool-aide and my daughter screams to me in the middle of the aisle 'Oh NO MOMMY LOOOOOOK, we do not drink kool-aide it is BAD FOR YOU".

I wanted to die. :laugh: :laugh: :grumble:

Thanks. I just spit water all over my computer. Hahahahahahahaha! TOO funny!

I think your mommy skills are FULLY intact! Getting kids involved in cooking is something I encourage when I counsel parents! Way to go for you! Kids LOVE to eat what they have created. You are right on track, momma!

Shannon023

I should be so aware of the crap I shove in my pie hole. :embarassed:

I wouldn't worry, Lina. :flowerforyou:

kendra1976

Lina, you are doing great. Andrew does same of the same stuff. He does get treats too. He asked me the other day if he would have to exercise more now or could go to the gym with me. lol Andrew's daycare does focus on healthier eating though. I know this because my husband got Andrew donuts the other morning and Andrew came home and told me that Ms. Donna said that donuts were not good for me and that they have too much sugar. So for us it is a point of discussion.

Jena_72

So you have seen the overweight kids out with thier mom at an all you can eat buffet right? You know the ones letting the (overweight) kid get ANYTHING in ANY amount they want??? THAT Mother IS damaging her child! I take my kids to the buffet but they know the drill salads veggies proteins a little spaghetti or mac & cheese fried shrimp what ever thats cool as long as it is ALL there not just the crap. Are they going to just go nuts oh hell no and my kids aren't even FAT! If more parents talked to their YOUNG kids about things like calories and portions we wouldn't be the HUGE country we have become. You MAMA Are doing great!! No she doesn't even know what a calorie is but she will and when she does she'll also know mom told me not to have too many of them! :drinker: Yay Mom! :bigsmile: