Morbidly Obese and need help now!

Win0727

My name is Win and I am morbidly obese. Seeing those words scare me to the core. Morbidly. I am 5'3" and weigh 238. I work in a bank, so my activity level is limited throughout the day. This is the highest weight I have ever been. To say that I am scared is putting it mildly.

I need to know how to do this? Where to begin, what should my goals be set at, what is a reasonable amount of calories to consume? Does it matter caloric wise that I am obese? I need help. I would love to hear from others that have been here and conquered this.

I have been doing this for about 2 weeks. MFP has me at 1200 calories. I know from reading the forums there is a HUGE debate on 1200 versus eating BMR. I have lost a few pounds but I want to know that I am doing this right. What is best for my body type and long term goals.

I walk 2.1 miles a day on a trail behind our house. This is something that I have started along with restricting calories 2 weeks ago. I can honestly say that I love it. Feels good. So, at this point, exercise is not a problem. I know eventually I am going to have to start with weights, but the idea of walking into our small town gym mortifies me.

I am not looking for a pity party or negative comments. I honestly need help.

Thanks!

karmac0matic

Just because none of us can see you, know how well you'd do with certain exercise, etc... I would suggest seeing a PT or nutritionist. They'll give you answers catered to your body and your body type/skill level/activity level/job/etc, that way you know exactly what you should be doing/eating/planning/setting as goals.

It's difficult for us to help much besides just saying "Make sure calories out > calories in" (because to be honest, that's weight loss for ya).

I understand it's a scary time. Please just make sure you don't put it off any longer, we all want you to live a long happy life and if something happened to you, it would make it that much more difficult.

So glad to hear you want to start changing your lifestyle!! GOOD LUCK!!

serindipte

You can do it! I am 5'4" and started out at 229 so close to the same as you These are the links that helped me get going:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets

If you aren't already using one, get and use a food scale. Weigh all solids. Measuring cups/spoons are not accurate:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVjWPclrWVY
Neither is guessing:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1270280-food-weighing-scale-miracles

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/872212-you-re-probably-eating-more-than-you-think

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide

besaro

its only been two weeks and you are seeing results. why not just stay the course, read, learn adapt as you go. You dont need to make massive changes right away, slowly start changing things.

my immediate advice is to up your calories a bit, i wish i would have when i first started. keep reading everything, ignoring 90% of it. get a digital scale to weigh your foods, get a hrm to get a better estimate on your calorie burn.

Sassymama66_75HARD

I would suggest setting small goals instead of one huge final goal. My first goal is to just be overweight. Then I will set a new goal. If you would like to add me as a friend please do!

nancy10272004

I started at 5'3" and 236. 1200 calories is way too low for you. I have MFP set to lose 1 lb a week and it put me in the 1600 calorie range. I've been losing pretty steadily and that number of calories doesn't make me feel hungry or deprived of my favorite foods.

You might even move it up to 1800 calories. I forget all the calculations but I'm pretty sure you'd still be in a calorie deficit with 1800 calories/day.

Archon2

I'd say keep it simple and go from there. Don't rush things. If your 1200/day isn't enough then experiment adding some more and fine tune. You are walking regularly, so commit to doing that no matter what! It is great that you got started and are feeling good.

SymphonynSonata

Don't be scared of going to the gym. The only people who would judge you are jerks who don't deserve the time of day or your slightest giving of a single ****.

2essie

You have taken the first step to being healthy. Signing up to MFP is, in my opinion one of the best things you can do. Karmac0matic is correct in saying professional help is the best way forward. However, if you want to go it alone I think you should find your BMR and TDEE. Scooby workshop via Google will work this out for you because at the moment I think you are eating too little. If you find your TDEE you can start from there as that is the point you would start putting weight on. If you eat below this level you will lose weight.

You can also do it by finding your BMR and eating back most of your exercise calories. Some people recommend 50% of your excercise calories. This allows for any mistakes in either calories or exercise. Again Scooby workshop will give you the figure you need to work on. It is never going to be acurate, but nothing is but will be a good estimate and much better than the 1200 calories that MFP has given you. If you start on 1200 calories you have no way of dropping lower when you get nearer your goal.

I hope this helps you get started. You can do it because others have. You need dedication, friends and determination and the weight will start rolling off. Good luck

jjplato

but the idea of walking into our small town gym mortifies me.

Don't let it intimidate you too much. There are people of all different levels of fitness working out in most gyms. You may think that the people who have been doing it for a while and are in good shape will look down on you, but for the most part, people will respect you for making the effort. Everybody's got to start somewhere. Like the ad says, just do it!

keobooks

If you are scared of the gym you could do what I do. I go on the treadmill in the back row. People rarely turn around and it gives you a good view of everyone else. I'm almost exactly your weight and size and I've not seen many people bigger than me, but I've seen people in worse shape giving it a go. This inspires me because I figure if they can do it, I can too.

I notice most people seem absorbed in their own world on the treadmill. Usually they are watching the television or just not paying attention. Another good thing is water aerobics. The pool hides just about everything below the armpits and lifts your boobs at the same time, making you look zaftig. (Very curvy!)

DivineChoices

Your daily calories are based on gender, age, weight, height, and how much exercise you do. I weigh 323.2 lbs and my daily goal is 2310 calories, set to lose 1 lb a week. I regularly burn over 3000 calories a day just on everyday routines. If you don't think you can maintain at 1200 calories, you can rework your settings so you only lose 1 lb a week, instead of 2. Make sure you log your exercise calories, but only eat back 50-75% of them.

You CAN do this!

Make sure your weighing ALL of your food (except liquids) on a food scale, and log EVERYTHING that goes in your mouth. If you go over on calories, don't let it push you off the wagon. Bad days happen. Just pick yourself up and try better at the next meal.

stephanieluvspb

don't cut out any food that you don't want to stop eating forever. eat in moderation, but eat what you enjoy. it will make this journey much easier and , in MY opinion and just from what I see in myself, result in less cheating. GOOD, GOOD LUCK TO YOU! you can do this, it may take awhile and you may fall, but dust yourself off and try it again please feel free to friend request me, I log daily, my diary is open and I have 70 pounds to lose.

Pusarah

You look like you're well on your way. I was confused at first when I started out and still learning day by day. You sound like you've made a lot of good changes and those will add up to big results.
I too am morbidly obese and in the process of changing things and it does feel SO good!
I don't have a lot of advice but wish you nothing but success! The inches lost and the numbers going backwards on the scale will make you so happy you made those little changes to a happier lifestyle

tryett

I an 5-4 and started at a little over 230 this time. I understand how scary it can be and I agree with other posters that 1200 seems really low. My dietician/nutritionist started me between 15-1600 calories. I also work in an office setting. I did join a gym with my son as it gets to hot in the summer to walk outside. Is there a friend you could go with?

lemurcat12

You can definitely do it. I started at 220 and 5'3 (started actively logging on MFPa couple of months into it, was logging at Livestrong earlier). I was totally in denial before I got up on that scale. I knew I was way heavier than was good for me, but I figured I was close to my previously high scale weight of 189. Nope. I was depressed for a few days after I weighed myself and then decided it might take longer than I'd thought, but it was coming off.

I started at 1250 (I changed it from 1200, since at 1200 you are either over or being told you are eating too little, so too little room for error, IMO) and still aim for 1250 net, although I usually eat a good bit more with exercise and have adjusted my activity from sedentary to lightly active, so I wouldn't say that goal is wrong for you (depending on your age--I forgot to check). For me it was important to aim for 2 lb/week in part because getting rid of that weight played a part in helping me to be more active. On the other hand, (1) at your current weight you are probably getting the number based on a sedentary estimate and you may not be, most people aren't, MFP's job explanation is not a very good one; and (2) you can eat more and lose if the calorie count feels too low or leaves you with insufficient energy/constantly wanting to cheat or just not happy.

The important thing to remember is that the MFP way really gives you a ton of flexibility to fit this to your own needs and preferences.

I think it's good not to let yourself get overwhelmed at first--you can do this in smaller steps. I'm really list oriented, so made a bunch of lists of goals, for a week, a month, so on, and then started journaling, which was helpful in dealing with some of the emotional stuff that I'd been using food for, but perhaps that's too touchy-feely or just me specific. But in terms of the practical bits, the two things I started with were (1) getting control of my diet and where I was overeating, and (2) getting more active. I knew I was too out of shape to leap into a major exercise program too soon--I'd just feel bad and get frustrated, so I started with walking more, like you have. I think that's okay for now, although I agree with everyone else that I both understand why walking into the gym is intimidating and that it really is in your head and the gym exists in part for people like us, and IMO the people there should be helpful and show you around, etc.

On the diet, I think it's helpful to log how you have been eating and look at where the calories are coming from. I had a feeling I was consuming a lot of calories in a thoughtless way, and I was. When I replaced that with 3 balanced meals (it doesn't matter how often you eat, I just prefer 3), I actually cut calories too much at first and had to realize that I could incorporate more calorie dense foods than my initial reaction had been. But the point is the MFP tool allows you to put in sample meals, as well as past meals just to see how the calories add up--it's a good way to learn meal planning.

The MFP calculator works just fine for finding calorie goals and the rest, especially at first when it's easy to get overwhelmed. You can play around with everything else and worry about macros and so on later, unless you are the kind of person who finds that stuff motivating. A couple of things to remember, though--it assumes no exercise, even though it asks how much you plan to exercise, so you need to log exercise and eat back at least some of the calories from it (not all, since sometimes the counts are overstated), and if your calories are too low you can lower your weekly goal. There's no rush--it's more important to make this sustainable.

You say: "Does it matter caloric wise that I am obese? I need help."

It matters in two ways. First, when it calculates your calorie burn it uses a formula that takes into account a lot of things, including current weight. So at a higher weight you burn more even without exercise and when you exercise you will also burn more. That allows you to eat more and lose--so you definitely will be losing at 1500-1600 or even 1800, just not as fast. However, it also means that, especially if you are exercising, it's okay to have a somewhat higher deficit (in other words, aim at 2 lb/week) than someone who is only 15 lb overweight. It's really up to you, what feels sustainable and whether you have enough energy at how much you are eating.

lisasomers0514

In my experience, slow and steady wins the race EVERY time. I am a recovering drug addict (5 years) and I use the same tools and principles for food as I do drugs and alcohol. I call someone when I need to, I remind myself to just not use (in this case food), and I hold myself accountable. Food addiction is every bit as serious as drugs/alcohol. Discovering WHY we use is the key to breaking the chains of addiction. What pain haven't you dealt with in your life? What experiences keep you from loving yourself? What are you holding on to that you haven't been able to let go of?

These are just some of questions I've had to answer but, in doing so, I was able to set myself free from actively using food to cope with and numb the pain of life. This really isn't about how I look in a pair of short...it's about ME - my soul, my mind and then my body. Feel free to reach out to me anytime you need to. I have experienced, first hand, hopelessness and fear. I can share my experiences with you and, just maybe, they will help you.

MaggieLoo79

I would get a pedometer and start shooting for 10,000 steps a day. As for eating, 1200 calories is hard. If it were me, I'd try to recreate what my normal food day looked like BEFORE you started your journey. Get an average of what you were eating (calorie count) and then subtract 500 calories to begin with. For every 10 pounds you lose, readjust your calorie settings.

DanaDark

Given your work and your description of it, I'd imagine you'd have a rather sedentary normal day. So, being female at your height I would also imagine you'd have a much lower TDEE than someone That is nearly a foot taller and very active. So, getting 1200 calories a day back from MFP doesn't seem out of line.

You should be aiming to lose 1 to 1.5 pounds a week.

During your weight loss, you should see about some strength training exercises to help retain muscle mass. This will help ensure more of the weight loss comes from fat than from muscle.

Any cardio activity you do, such as long walks and maybe in time running etc. should be logged into MFP. From there, if MFP suggests you burned 200 calories, log it in as 100 (half) instead. This allows you to eat some more throughout the day, and the 50% reduction helps offset over estimating calories burned.

Initially you will be seeing lots of weight loss from water. After that, it will slow down, but still go down. DO NOT GET DISCOURAGED WHEN THIS HAPPENS. That is what causes most people to give up. They lose 10 pounds the first week, then only 1 the second week and assume they have failed and give up.

The MOST IMPORTANT piece of advice we can all give: Stick with it. Keep coming onto this site and getting involved in the forums and friends you add here. It helps keep you going. If you need, ask ANY questions you want here. ANY. It is the internet and we all adore sarcasm, so be cautious of that!

bizgirl26

1200 is not enough! Not sure of your age but you need to be eating closer to 1500-1600 a day . 1200 a day is a set up for failure and future gain back of all the weight you lose

trekkie_bbs

Believe in yourself and if you are serious that you want to lose the weight you will. I eat the things I love and will never give up what I love to lose weight. With that said I sometimes pay a price for eating the things I love. My weight doesn't go down as fast, it makes me feel sick after I eat it, I have to work harder to eat those things and do I feel up to it?

I too was in your place. I was labled as morbidly obese per bmi and have chosen to get to normal and have made it! My goal weight was set too low originally however unless you have been where you want to go you just have to choose a weight point. That does not mean it won't change like mine did.

Believe in yourself, take it a day at a time, think about what foods make you feel full and try some new things. I hate milk! I can't stand it so when I decided going to McDonalds for an egg mcmuffin each morning needed to stop cause I didn't really care much for it anyhow I chose to try different kinds of yogurt, and even.... (dun, dun, dun) almond milk.

Yogurt is NOT something I care for however I love fruit. So I chose to do some experiments and mixed snack pack no sugar fruit with it and now I LOVE greek yogurt that way. I was also shocked how much I LOVE almond milk. Especially with cereal to me they compliment each other.

I do own a scale and do weigh some of my foods only cause I'm too lazy to measure or count things out to be honest. To me the scale makes most tasks so much easier and faster so although it sounds like a pain you will find it actually helps speed up prep time. Imagine counting out 35 peanuts instead of just measuring 1 oz. for a snack.

Research, research, research! For me I hate just trying something without any idea where to start. I know my meals that I eat are not a perfect balance of the food groups and honestly could care less about the food groups. I love something from each group and I don't plan to eat only vegies till I die so plan my meals the day before and sometimes a couple days in advance so I don't have to panic when that day comes. I also have emergency backup plans in case I can't get home to eat. I know what fast food I can eat that I like and how to best work it into my day.

It is not hard. It just requires you to commit to it. You CAN do this if your heart is truly dedicated to it.
I believe in you!

Jim

donjessop

I would tend to agree with everyone in that 1200 calories a day is too low. One of the most important things to do is to set realistic goals for yourself and understand that you may not make that goal in the time frame you expected. It took time to put on the weight and it will take time to take off the weight.

I started off at 355 pounds and have shrunk more than 100 pounds. For me there was one thing that was a big factor in both my weight gain and my weight loss: soda. I stopped drinking all soda July 31st last year and I believe that this is the one factor that accounted for the majority of the weight gain/loss.

Another factor was that after examining what I was eating I discovered that I was under eating protein. Sure, I met the MyFitnessPal level (15%), but based on my weight and activity that number was too low. It needed to be over 20% for me to be eating "properly".

So, my advice? Take it slow and keep reading everything you can about nutrition. As for a TDEE calculator, I find the Scooby calculator to be inaccurate for larger individuals such as myself. If It Fits Your Macros (http://iifym.com/tdee-calculator/) seems to be more accurate based upon my own experience. (Your mileage may vary.)

You can do this and we are all here to help you whenever you need it.

_HeartsOnFire_

You can do it! I am 5'4" and started out at 229 so close to the same as you These are the links that helped me get going:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets

If you aren't already using one, get and use a food scale. Weigh all solids. Measuring cups/spoons are not accurate:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVjWPclrWVY
Neither is guessing:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1270280-food-weighing-scale-miracles

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/872212-you-re-probably-eating-more-than-you-think

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide

QFT

Sassymama66_75HARD

Don't be scared of going to the gym. The only people who would judge you are jerks who don't deserve the time of day or your slightest giving of a single ****.

So agree with this - I did not want to go to the gym but my son encouraged me - everyone has been so wonderful and supportive. Have had some nice conversations with the super fit people and enjoy the gym now!

Lleldiranne

Read the links that serendipte posted. Lots of good advice there (I especially love the sexypants one)

I am assuming that you entered sedentary as your activity level and a goal to lose 2 lbs per week. If you work in a bank and are on your feet a lot (even if you're standing in place), you can probably use lightly active, which could be a small difference in calories. Also make sure to log your exercise and eat back 50-75% of those calories (this is how MFP is meant to be used!) If you do that, you'll probably be getting enough calories to sustain this long term ... just remember that as your weight goes down, you want to lower your goal to lose less a week

I also second the advice to not completely cut out any food that you enjoy. Practice portion control and allow yourself treats in moderation - work them into your daily calorie and macro goals.

You are off to a good start - you can do this! :flowerforyou:

simplydelish2

You can do this!

While I agree with others that you shouldn't be scared of the gym...I totally understand - especially in a small town. A good start with weights would be kettle bells (I love mine!). My advise here - start today! The more weight you lose before really starting to tone, the saggier the skin and we don't want that!

Calories - not a one size fits all. Play with these. I lose best eating at my BMR -15% level. I also do best with a low carb plan. These things are personal and you need to see what feels best for you.

I'd be glad to answer any questions if you'd like to PM me.

Best of luck! You are on the right path.

UmmSqueaky

Welcome to the forums! I too am morbidly obese, but I'm only 5 lbs away from plain old obese The threads mentioned above are a great place to start. Because you're a shorty like me, our bodies sadly require less fuel, thus the lower calorie recommendation. When I first set my account up, mfp gave me 1200 calories to lose 1.4 lbs a week. I dropped it down to 1 lb a week and got roughly 1400. That's been a sustainable amount for me this far. Best of luck!

juliezum

Great suggestions from all....I'm sure you'd agree. I started out at 275lbs. I'm 5'8". I joined a gym and got myself a PT. I didn't care about being overweight and going to the gym, I did care however about looking stupid using equipment. So for me, the PT was beyond awesome. As far as other gym goers, no problem there. Every person, regardless of shape, are just there doing their own thing. I've been met with smiles and occassionally encouraging word. It's become my "church" so to speak. I not only enjoy going there for the obvious, but it's my hour away from all that is hectic. Good luck to you! Feel free to add me a a friend if you wish.

amandasimons50

My name is Win and I am morbidly obese. Seeing those words scare me to the core. Morbidly. I am 5'3" and weigh 238. I work in a bank, so my activity level is limited throughout the day. This is the highest weight I have ever been. To say that I am scared is putting it mildly.

I need to know how to do this? Where to begin, what should my goals be set at, what is a reasonable amount of calories to consume? Does it matter caloric wise that I am obese? I need help. I would love to hear from others that have been here and conquered this.

I have been doing this for about 2 weeks. MFP has me at 1200 calories. I know from reading the forums there is a HUGE debate on 1200 versus eating BMR. I have lost a few pounds but I want to know that I am doing this right. What is best for my body type and long term goals.

I walk 2.1 miles a day on a trail behind our house. This is something that I have started along with restricting calories 2 weeks ago. I can honestly say that I love it. Feels good. So, at this point, exercise is not a problem. I know eventually I am going to have to start with weights, but the idea of walking into our small town gym mortifies me.

I am not looking for a pity party or negative comments. I honestly need help.

Thanks!

Does it have you on 1200 calories based only on your sedentary lifestyle? I'm 5'3" and 244... I'm a daycare teacher so I'm a little more active. I set a goal to lose 2 pounds a week and exercise at least 30 min 7 days a week and my calorie limit is 1590... I'm still a little curious as to how it all works as well...

levitateme

You can do it! I am 5'4" and started out at 229 so close to the same as you These are the links that helped me get going:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets

If you aren't already using one, get and use a food scale. Weigh all solids. Measuring cups/spoons are not accurate:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVjWPclrWVY
Neither is guessing:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1270280-food-weighing-scale-miracles

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/872212-you-re-probably-eating-more-than-you-think

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide

+1

The information in those links is exactly what you need to succeed.

My personal advice:

Set your calories to 1500-1700 per day and log exercise conservatively. I have gone from 186-150 by eating 1600-1900 a day. 1200 will result in weight loss but you will struggle to stay at that deficit which will make it more likely that you binge or quit.

Get a food scale. It's very common for new people to both underestimate their calories while overestimating their exercise burns and then come to the forums and say they are doing everything right but not losing. Weighing your food is as easy as Plate, dump food, zero, dump food, zero, dump food, zero. It seriously takes a few seconds and is more accurate than using cups/spoons.

Find an activity that you enjoy and can do comfortably and stick with it. If you hate the elliptical, don't use it. If you like walking, then walk for 30 mins a day. Pick up some weights, just make sure it is a weight that challenges you.

Good luck. :drinker:

MellMo1971

Don't worry about people looking at you at the gym. All 305 + lbs. of me went there about 10 months ago (through today) and I'm doing all sorts of exercises. I just laugh when I think about things jiggling when I'm doing jumping jacks and jump rope. I'm sure I've been entertaining there! . You just need to care about you and your goals, not other people's concerns. I'd suggest weight lifting at the very beginning. It is changing my life and body shape in ways I had never imagined. Muscle burns fat and helps you lose the weight. While I'm 5' 9" tall, so can't completely relate to your height, I'd suggest not cutting calories too low, and aim for a 1 lb. loss of fat per week. I have a generous calorie allowance by setting to reach my goals a bit slower, do not rule out any food groups, and realize this is a lifestyle change, not a race. I've lost and regained much weight throughout my life with calorie restrictions and excess cardio; it doesn't last long-term. Weight lifting, moderate cardio, a small calorie deficit, and consistency are the keys to long-term success.