Hard to be "good" anymore

missylectro

When I started I found it so easy to stay on track, now I cheat every other day.... I'm not sure how to motivate myself to say no to treats and extra calories... I am good in the morning and afternoon and start off the day with good intentions but then 6pm hits and I feel like eating everything I shouldn't in the house.

I wish it were as easy as not buying "bad" foods but I live with my family and I'm not the one that buys it...

Anyone else feel the same? How can I find my beginner's motivation again?

missylectro

I want to add... It feels so good to binge, it gives me this sort of satisfaction, but it's mixed with guilt...

Athijade

Are you binging on foods you have totally cut out? Why did you cut them out? Why don't you enjoy all foods in moderation all the time?

missiontofitness

One family member of mine has her husband hide the chocolate in the house, and only give her a few pieces at a time when she asks. It helps her moderate it.
In regards to foods in the house, it's all about willpower. If it helps, prepackage everything and write the macros on it. If you can see you're eating 500 calories in Oreos in one sitting, and it's x amount of fat for those bags, it can help you visualize what you are overeating on.

Regardless, you should speak to someone about your binging. It sounds like there may be some underlying issues.

missylectro

Are you binging on foods you have totally cut out? Why did you cut them out? Why don't you enjoy all foods in moderation all the time?

What is this word moderation?

I cannot have peanut butter for example in moderation, I feel like eating more than one tablespoon

KimberlyinMN

Also, make sure you are logging ALL that you are eating, binge or no binge. Now THAT is a real eye-opener. The "dieting" wagon is pretty easy to fall off of if you are restricting yourself from eating certain foods. I've had pizza every Sunday night. Granted, one slice, but I'm still at least eating it. I'm not sure what sort of plan you were following, but maybe it's a good time to find something else that is more do-able. Or to find an activity that you like that can take the place of the binge.

wozkaa

My motivation has been waxing and waning too, OP.

The biggest hurdle i have is NIBBLING. I have 18 month old twins, and while they eat well it's stuff I keep to a minimum for my dietary goals. I'll have a filling and healthy lunch (which i enjoy) but then there might be dried fruit, or leftover parts of a PB & J sandwich. A bite of banana muffin etc

I am not sure of the solution, other than trying to just do better each day.

missylectro

One family member of mine has her husband hide the chocolate in the house, and only give her a few pieces at a time when she asks. It helps her moderate it.
In regards to foods in the house, it's all about willpower. If it helps, prepackage everything and write the macros on it. If you can see you're eating 500 calories in Oreos in one sitting, and it's x amount of fat for those bags, it can help you visualize what you are overeating on.

Regardless, you should speak to someone about your binging. It sounds like there may be some underlying issues.

Probably the meds I'm taking

ChristineRoze

I'm very similar to you, i honestly have to cut out certain foods because if i eat the tiniest bit i will go over board. I have more control before the food is in my mouth. What helps me is not having access to it in my house, but unfortunately you can't do that. Maybe ask for the family to support you and hide their snack foods? not sure.

IndigoFlowers

You're restricting too much - either mentally (by saying that you cannot/must not have certain foods) or physically (by not eating enough calories).

Your body is trying to revolt against you, because you are denying it.

mactaffy84

I think it depends on what is the food being eaten during the binge. If it is only processed, high sugar, high fat food (you know, the stuff that tastes fantastic), then I don't think the body is revolting. That is an emotional eating issue and if it is truly bad and the OP wants to change it, then seeking some therapy, or simply talking to a trusted friend, might help. Now, if the only thing in the house is something the OP doesn't like and THAT is what is being eaten, then I think it is physiological in nature, the OP is truly hungry, and should eat more.

Just a thought.

beccadaniixox

Are you binging on foods you have totally cut out? Why did you cut them out? Why don't you enjoy all foods in moderation all the time?

What is this word moderation?

I cannot have peanut butter for example in moderation, I feel like eating more than one tablespoon

Could always buy the PB that comes in individual cups and pouches, so it's in a sealed serving. If the one you like doesn't come like that, you could buy little tupperwares and have it packed up in serving sizes.

_HeartsOnFire_

Are you logging your binges?

gypsy_spirit

The hardest thing to learn is moderation of foods that we used to binge on.
The most important thing to learn is moderation of foods we used to binge on.

Everything about this process is a choice. It was easy for me to make excuses for way too many years. Time wasted. Make up your mind what you want and then work hard to get it. You will not be perfect. You will have bad minutes - they do not have to turn into hours or days.

Learning the lesson of moderation is the ONLY way to be successful in the long run. Good luck in your choices.

HerkMeOff

I guess the question you have to ask your self is how bad do you want this?

Also, figure out why you have such an unhealthy relationship with food, and quit finding someone/something else to blame.

missylectro

I'm very similar to you, i honestly have to cut out certain foods because if i eat the tiniest bit i will go over board. I have more control before the food is in my mouth. What helps me is not having access to it in my house, but unfortunately you can't do that. Maybe ask for the family to support you and hide their snack foods? not sure.

That's what I did and they did do that

missylectro

I think it depends on what is the food being eaten during the binge. If it is only processed, high sugar, high fat food (you know, the stuff that tastes fantastic), then I don't think the body is revolting. That is an emotional eating issue and if it is truly bad and the OP wants to change it, then seeking some therapy, or simply talking to a trusted friend, might help. Now, if the only thing in the house is something the OP doesn't like and THAT is what is being eaten, then I think it is physiological in nature, the OP is truly hungry, and should eat more.

Just a thought.

Yeah I should probably eat more

missylectro

Are you logging your binges?

No. I'm too embarrassed to

missylectro

The hardest thing to learn is moderation of foods that we used to binge on.
The most important thing to learn is moderation of foods we used to binge on.

Everything about this process is a choice. It was easy for me to make excuses for way too many years. Time wasted. Make up your mind what you want and then work hard to get it. You will not be perfect. You will have bad minutes - they do not have to turn into hours or days.

Learning the lesson of moderation is the ONLY way to be successful in the long run. Good luck in your choices.

Noted. I will have to change my mentality and my choices.

sculli123

Once you learn to make 'good' things taste like 'bad' things it becomes way easier. For example, this morning I made red velvet pancakes. Sounds kind of bad right? But it wasn't bad at all, I use a high protein organic pancake mix, add in red velvet flavored protein powder, an egg, and top it with calorie free pancake syrup. Was very GOOD in every way.

There's lots of good things you can make that taste really awesome that are actually good for you. Once I learned to do that, it's been pretty easy to lose weight and easy to maintain because I don't crave anything. I just make very tasty alternatives to junk.

cwolfman13

Are you binging on foods you have totally cut out? Why did you cut them out? Why don't you enjoy all foods in moderation all the time?

What is this word moderation?

I cannot have peanut butter for example in moderation, I feel like eating more than one tablespoon

maybe you should work on that...moderation is a learned thing and as with any learned thing, it takes deliberate practice. Long term success is largely about learning moderation and portion control...without those two things, weight maintenance is a real *****.

missylectro

Once you learn to make 'good' things taste like 'bad' things it becomes way easier. For example, this morning I made red velvet pancakes. Sounds kind of bad right? But it wasn't bad at all, I use a high protein organic pancake mix, add in red velvet flavored protein powder, an egg, and top it with calorie free pancake syrup. Was very GOOD in every way.

There's lots of good things you can make that taste really awesome that are actually good for you. Once I learned to do that, it's been pretty easy to lose weight and easy to maintain because I don't crave anything. I just make very tasty alternatives to junk.

I'm familiar with that, I made fries taste "bad"
Having a hard time with sweets tho

sculli123

I'm familiar with that, I made fries taste "bad"
Having a hard time with sweets tho

Most of the stuff I'm talking about tastes like desserts though. Mix protein powder with fat free greek yogurt and top with lite whipped cream = tastes like chocolate mousse. I make protein cakes and stuff all the time too. Going to attempt a healthy cheesecake either tonight or tomorrow too.

missylectro

I'm familiar with that, I made fries taste "bad"
Having a hard time with sweets tho

Most of the stuff I'm talking about tastes like desserts though. Mix protein powder with fat free greek yogurt and top with lite whipped cream = tastes like chocolate mousse. I make protein cakes and stuff all the time too. Going to attempt a healthy cheesecake either tonight or tomorrow too.

Oh awesome! I'll add you and you can keep me posted on the recipes

Iwishyouwell

OP keep in mind that everybody's definition of "moderation" is not the same. Be real with yourself and do what actually works for you.

I am not a "2 oreos a night" guy. People who brag that they have single-servings of their favorite treats everyday are living on Mars as far as I'm concerned. If I'm going to have ice cream, or oreos, I've gotten to the point of giving myself the freedom to eat as much as I want, without any guilt, shame, or condemnation. Then once I'm finished I move on. It means having a pack of oreos every once in awhile instead of a single serving several times a week. But it works for me. The "half a cup of ice cream a night" ain't cutting it for me, and I'd be a fool to waste my time trying to acclimate to other people's definition of "moderation".

It took me a very, very long time to get to this point though.

sappy42

I'm familiar with that, I made fries taste "bad"
Having a hard time with sweets tho

Most of the stuff I'm talking about tastes like desserts though. Mix protein powder with fat free greek yogurt and top with lite whipped cream = tastes like chocolate mousse. I make protein cakes and stuff all the time too. Going to attempt a healthy cheesecake either tonight or tomorrow too.

Oh awesome! I'll add you and you can keep me posted on the recipes

A healthy cheesecake? Red velvet pancakes? Dude, I'm adding you too!

JesterMFP

Honestly, I think you need to change your mindset about it all. "Being good"; "bad foods", "cheating"... imo this is what is sabotaging your efforts. Try not to think in such black & white, all or nothing terms. And, when I say "try", I mean that you need to learn how to think differently, and it takes practice. You have a classic dieter's mentality where you are oscillating between being "good" and "naughty", or "on the wagon" and "off the wagon".

Foods aren't inherently "bad"; food is food. Some food has more calcium than others, some has more fibre, some is more energy dense... it's about finding a way to balance your intake so that you're giving your body the nutrients it needs, along with the right amount of energy, and at the same time, you are able to enjoy the food you eat. You're not "bad" for eating food that you enjoy. You're just very normal.

I want to add... It feels so good to binge, it gives me this sort of satisfaction, but it's mixed with guilt...

This is also very normal. You need to find out what psychological needs you're meeting by binging. For some people it's about feeling the freedom or empowerment of eating what you want to eat, a kind of "F you" to the part of your brain that is saying you can only eat x, y and z. Some people feel like they're in control when they restrict their eating, some feel in control when they eat what they want to eat, in whatever quantities they choose. If you can pin down why the binge eating feels good, that can help you change it.

A lot of people feel that pull to rebel against a diet - any diet where you're restricting yourself at all. It's very common for people to start cutting calories, or restricting certain food items, and immediately wanting to eat more, or to eat the forbidden fruit. This is why being overly restrictive doesn't work, particularly for people who already have an unhealthy relationship with food. There are no easy answers when you struggle with food as much as you clearly do, but it's key to try to let go of the black & white thinking, to forgive yourself when you do overeat, and to try to build a lifestyle that feels as little as possible like you're "on a diet". If you constantly feel like you're denying yourself, punishing yourself even (which is what it sounds like) then it's not going to be a lifestyle you can sustain for years.

RHachicho

I'm beginning to approach the same problem as you OP. I have lost 71lb's in a little under 5 months. And while I found it easy at first I really miss being able to say ... eat a whole bowl of walnuts. Or a big bowl of ice cream. I have managed to resist binging or even going over my calorie limit so far. But it has been getting harder and harder and the weight loss has been slowing down.

I am considering doing a "mini bulk" It's an invention totally my own and I am going to see how well it does for me. If I decide to do it then one month I am going to eat at a significant calorie surplus still eating mostly healthy and go max volume and intensity on the strength training and weight lifting. My rationale behind this is that my body and mind has been on low calories for so long it is simply exhausted by it. So I'm going to give it what it wants. While giving it somewhere productive to spend the calories. That way any weight gain I make during this month will hopefully be significantly composed of lean mass.

I would be interested to know what people think of this idea?

daynerz

passion is more powerful than cravings


you dont want the loss bad enough

MaggieLoo79

I struggle with this. It's psychological for me. I lose weight and then I think, "That wasn't too bad. I can lose this weight again, easy." Part of it, for me, is that I ate whatever I wanted as a kid. I never learned portion control or how to eat healthy, but I stayed pretty thin. It's only been since my 20's when my metabolism started to slow down that I've had to make healthy choices (make choices period). I want to be able to eat that way again, so I rebel. I keep reminding myself that I'm a grown up now. My choices have consequences. Its tough! :frown:

JesterMFP

passion is more powerful than cravings


you dont want the loss bad enough

Disordered eating patterns tend to be a bit more complicated than just not wanting it enough.