Moms: Restricting Children's eating/ eating habits

JassiBear

I really struggled with my weight as a child, and I was on facebook on this page titled "Mom's got ink" and they posted a recipe on there that was disgustingly unhealthy and promoted feeding it to children... I just got really upset because I think that childhood obesity is a tragic epidemic that's only getting worse and worse and kid's are able to stay entertained without having to move around and junk food is cheap and in abundance. Are there any mom's whose input could be valuable here? I am not mother yet but I feel that positive and healthy eating habits should be engrained in children by their caretakers or parents.... I felt that if I had better eating guidance I wouldn't struggle with my weight as much as I did growing up and in adulthood. Bad habits are soooo hard to change. What do ya'll moms and dads think? Am I wrong?

JassiBear

Sorry the tittle should have been moms and dads not just moms. Sorry.

Beckboo0912

Hmmm...touchy subject and to each their own. I don't think being too restrictive is good either because once they are okd enough to make their own decisions they can go off the deep end. So moderation is key!

SonicDeathMonkey80

What's wrong with giving/making your kid a ridiculous treat every now and then? Who is to say that person didn't otherwise teach their kids about healthy eating habits? My son eats pretty good throughout the day, but puts every single topping on his froyo when we go out. Revisit this topic when you actually have kids.

brianpperkins

Pretty much any food in a reasonable portion size is ok. The problem America faces is that the population as a whole has no clue what a portion is any more (as evidenced by over 2000 calorie milk shakes at Coldstone and 3000+ calorie entrees at Cheesecake Factory) coupled with sedentary life styles. Decadent, delicious foods are nothing to fear when consumed in realistic sizes. Sadly, rather than exercise any sort of portioning self control we label foods as "good" or "bad".

JassiBear

What's wrong with giving/making your kid a ridiculous treat every now and then? Who is to say that person didn't otherwise teach their kids about healthy eating habits? My son eats pretty good throughout the day, but puts every single topping on his froyo when we go out. Revisit this topic when you actually have kids.

no need to fight dirty, lol.

kgeyser

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

SonicDeathMonkey80

What's wrong with giving/making your kid a ridiculous treat every now and then? Who is to say that person didn't otherwise teach their kids about healthy eating habits? My son eats pretty good throughout the day, but puts every single topping on his froyo when we go out. Revisit this topic when you actually have kids.

no need to fight dirty, lol.

Ok, maybe I was a bit terse, but it is easy to make judgments like this when you aren't a parent. And there's no way you get 100% of the homelife. Now the thread about the mother wanting to feed her overweight daughters meal replacement shakes, go nuts lol

JassiBear

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Who did I tell how to parent in my post? I said my point of view and asked for yours.

Ang108

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

·1: Do you think that someone just because they produced off spring are all of a sudden so smart and wise that they can put people down just because they have no children and according to you therefore have no right to be concerned about what is happening to our kids ?

#2 The OP did not with one single word tell you/anyone how to parent. She spoke of her own experience as a child ( which I hope is valuable even though she has no children ). She asked for opinions of moms and dads and did not tell anyone what to do in regard to personal parenting.

I wish people in general would read posts for understanding and not just for often misguided criticism.

RunningOnWontons

As someone who also struggled with overcoming really poor eating habits as a child, I totally agree with you, OP. Ignore the folks saying "you don't know, you don't have kids." I think you are right to be concerned. And I would add that modeling good eating habits to one's kids is the best thing a parent can do, which also means teaching that treats are ok, in moderation. But trust me, when I am finally a mother (currently 4 and a half months pregnant with my first, whoo hoo) I will most definitely say to my child, "that's all, you've had enough" if they start reaching for an extra serving of cake, ice cream, or whatever. I guess a lot of folks don't like to admit this--and indeed it's probably more fashionable to be a "cool," permissive parent today--but kids depend on their parents to learn self-control. And that's an issue that includes, but goes way beyond, eating habits, IMO.

Athijade

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

JassiBear

As someone who also struggled with overcoming really poor eating habits as a child, I totally agree with you, OP. Ignore the folks saying "you don't know, you don't have kids." I think you are right to be concerned. And I would add that modeling good eating habits to one's kids is the best thing a parent can do, which also means teaching that treats are ok, in moderation. But trust me, when I am finally a mother (currently 4 and a half months pregnant with my first, whoo hoo) I will most definitely say to my child, "that's all, you've had enough" if they start reaching for an extra serving of cake, ice cream, or whatever. I guess a lot of folks don't like to admit this--and indeed it's probably more fashionable to be a "cool," permissive parent today--but kids depend on their parents to learn self-control. And that's an issue that includes, but goes way beyond, eating habits, IMO.

I really appreciate your post. At 9 years old I weighed 130 lbs...... by 13/14 I was 230 lbs and pre-diabetic with other weight related medical problems. The struggle is real...... especially for children who don't know better because they aren't taught better.

crhnz70

Hey OP, good for you for having an opinion - last I heard it was still allowed I'm a mum of 2. The youngest one who is 2 has days when she'll eat well, and other days all she wants is gummy bears lol. I'm lucky that she eats 4-5 servings of fruit a day as she hate vegies with a passion (she may get that from me). I know that I've made recipes in the past before I started the MFP journey that would have def added a tonne of calories to the daily tally. But mums are human too - we make mistakes. We get tired, switch off the brain, eat bad, and it flows on. But yes, we have the responsibility to teach good eating to our kids where we can. With regards to that recipe, an occasional treat is still fine - even if it does appear to be the most disgusting item you've ever seen lol. Every parent does their own thing - and the only thing you can really do is change the world one child at a time.

pambloomfield

I think you are correct. I know as a child it was eat everything on your plate mentality... My daughter in law is wonderful with her kids they eat when hungry not because its a certain time of day.. They eat breakfast and supper but not always lunch... They have a snack before bed and if in school eat a few bites ...... Our lives revolve around food ...Parties and get togethers we just have to start making healthy food choices for these family and friend times ,

JassiBear

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

bonniejo

Ellen Satter is the go to on stuff like this, she's great. The sum of what she says is:

The parent is responsible for what, when, where kids eat
The child is responsible for how much and whether they eat
See more at: http://ellynsatterinstitute.org/dor/divisionofresponsibilityinfeeding.php#sthash.l35umQ1z.dpuf

SonicDeathMonkey80

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

Those sound really good, but I'd bake them and include my son in making them. They sound a lot better than Totinos. Yeah, when people post recipes like that, best to keep your opinions to yourself and let people handle their own business as they see fit lol

williams969

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

Well, my kids (ages preschool thru teenager) wouldn't even eat that, whether or not it was a super special one time thing! Too greasy = Defcon 1 bathroom situation for them :sick: . To each their own, of course, but yeah, there seems to be a lot of unnecessary richness added to that.

Crescent rolls + roasted garlic + cheddar + pepperoni baked served with marinara or a little ranch = yummy, moderate goodness (and kid approved )

kgeyser

Who did I tell how to parent in my post? I said my point of view and asked for yours.

From the OP:

I am not mother yet but I feel that positive and healthy eating habits should be engrained in children by their caretakers or parents

It's a pretty big assumption that positive and healthy eating habits are not being ingrained in those children based on one recipe that someone posted on the internet.

·1: Do you think that someone just because they produced off spring are all of a sudden so smart and wise that they can put people down just because they have no children and according to you therefore have no right to be concerned about what is happening to our kids ?

Re-reading the one sentence that I wrote, I do not see where I said people have no right to be concerned about childhood obesity, nor do I see where I put anyone down for not having children. My comment was directed at the behavior of making assumptions about what people do all the time based on viewing one moment of their lives, and how I am tired of this behavior particularly from people who do not have children towards those who do.

#2 The OP did not with one single word tell you/anyone how to parent. She spoke of her own experience as a child ( which I hope is valuable even though she has no children ). She asked for opinions of moms and dads and did not tell anyone what to do in regard to personal parenting.

I wish people in general would read posts for understanding and not just for often misguided criticism.

I already answered this portion above as the where the OP came across as telling other people how to parent. And yes, she did speak of her experience as a child, however she also allowed that experience to bias her interpretation of parents posting a recipe on the internet, which led to all sorts of unfounded assumptions about parenting style.

I think you might benefit for taking your own advice about reading for understanding, not misguided criticism, or taking advantage of MFP's ignore feature.

brianpperkins

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

Where's the problem? As long as kids (or adults) aren't eating dozens of those at a time there is nothing wrong with a little culinary decadence. Maintaining healthy weight requires nothing more than keeping intake in check overall .... not at every meal ... not even every day.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some decadent food to consume since it fits in my calories.

1princesswarrior

First I can't have kids. But I wish my parents had taught me better when I was a kid about eating portions and fruits/vegetables. I'm lucky I was always active and didn't have a big appetite but my brother is morbidly obese. He still knows nothing about portion control or the importance of macros. So I think it's good that you're asking these questions OP. And here's why.

I have a young friend with a baby who asks me for advice all the time although I'm not sure why. Here baby is chubby and always hungry and she was asking me about suggestions for feeding the baby who is going onto baby food now. Not having kids, my only thoughts were several smaller meals each day so maybe help the baby's appetite and to meet the pediatrician's recommendations for fruits and vegetables.

kgeyser

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

Not something I would personally eat or that my kids would even like. That being said, it sounds like a recipe that kids of a certain age could participate a lot in the preparation, and even though deep-frying is not the healthiest form of cooking, it is a method of cooking. Nothing wrong with showing your kids how different foods are prepared, and it also provides an opportunity for parents to discuss nutrition - it's one thing to know foods are fried, but another to actually see the amount of oil used to do it and how much remains on the food after being removed from the fryer. If a parent were so inclined, it seems like a decent recipe to use to talk about substitutions and preparation methods - whole wheat dough, less ingredients, different ingredients, baking instead of frying. So it could be a good teachable moment.

It also could be a good recipe as is, because health and nutrition is about the big picture, not a single meal.

Slacker16

I am not mother yet but I feel that positive and healthy eating habits should be engrained in children by their caretakers or parents.... I felt that if I had better eating guidance I wouldn't struggle with my weight as much as I did growing up and in adulthood. Bad habits are soooo hard to change.

I'm not a mom, believe it or not, but I am a former fat kid (a former obese kid, in fact) and I'm not sure I'm down with this.

If nothing else, growing children have different nutritional needs than adults do so the eating habits of what to eat don't necessarily carry over from childhood. By 16-17 the kid will have roughly the same nutritional needs as at 26-27, but by then parents will have very little control over what and how much he eats.

Portion control can be taught in childhood, but you can't infer whether it is or isn't being taught based on a recipe. I get where you're coming from, and there are things that I wish my parents had done better food-wise, but ultimately I think saying "I struggle with my weight because I was never taught better" is a cop-out.

dopeysmelly

I understand where you are coming from OP.

As a Mom of an 8 year-old girl, my attitude has always been that we all eat the same food (so no special food for anyone, and that included when she was weaning), the chef decides the menu, but everyone can decide how much they have. Treats are limited - generally 1 a day (and only small) - and she has to eat her vegetables first. I try and explain that filling up on bread is not a good plan, because she has to save space for her vegetables if she wants a treat. We don't have desserts, only fruit, and we go out for ice cream maybe once a month (more on vacation though..).

It's interesting though. I have never restricted how much or how little food she has. If she wants more, she can have it (after she's finished everything else). She is very active. But she just seems to know when she's had enough, and just stops eating (no one has to clean their plate). She has a candy bag, which no one else touches, so if she skips the treat one day, it doesn't disappear and she can just have it another time. Treats don't have to be "earned" (except by finishing vegetables), and are not rewards for good behavior.

So far, so good. I think she has a healthier attitude to food at her age than I did, when candy etc. were rewards for good behavior and had to be shared (so it was a fight to grab as much as possible).

I don't know. We'll see what happens when she's a teenager.

dopeysmelly

I think I'm tired of people who are not parents telling everyone else how they should parent based on one-moment-in-time snapshots of people's lives.

Agreed.

Just what was this recipe anyway? Is it something that you know that these people feed their kids all the time? How do you know how those kids eat? Would like an answer OP.

It was white dough filled with 3 square pats of butter and then loaded with sausage chunks and pepperonis with cubed cheese and a ranch sauce. Garlic salt sprinkled inside. Rolled into pocket like shapes. Then deep fried according to recipe instruction and topped with powdered Parmesan cheese. Almost like a pizza roll type situation but I guess I was upset because there are ways to make pizza roll things so much healthier, so it got me upset because there's nothing wrong with pizza rolls but this recipe in particular irked me just for the sheer amount of unnecessary fat... and just... there's so much healthier ways to make the same thing for yourself and the kiddos. Of course I got attacked there was well when I even suggested this !

It's just my opinion, but, quite frankly, that sounds revolting.

kethry70

In all seriousness, the only things that throw this over the edge for me are the butter and ranch dressing- cause it sounds ick, the added garlic salt cause it is already salty foods, and the frying.

Kids need fat. Nothing in that is inherently bad. If I were to prepare that, the pepperoni would be nuked on paper towels for about 30 secs which removes a ton of grease and the sausage would be pre-browned. We would bake it. If I were to "fry" it, it would be pan-fried in EVOO.

I have a kid with texture issues ad another who will eat most things until big brother opens his mouth :P I pick my battles. It is more important to me that they never feel compelled to join the clean plate club thn it is to force foods on my oldest that make him gag. Over time he has added a few foods to his repertoire but he loves spicy food- so pepperoni and sausage are mainstays in my house. He is skinny as a rail and quits eating when he is full- even if the food is ice cream

MysteriousDreamer

I'm trying to teach my girls about real food. We love baking and cooking, so they enjoy eating real foods. They have their snacks, we have take out every now and then. For example we had kfc last night, healthy? No. Will it kill them? No. So tonight we are having broccoli and cauliflower soup with roasted capsicum and cheese damper.

For us it is not about restriction, but about moderation.

We love chickpea and choc chip biscuits, or zucchini and cocoa brownies. It's about being creative and making food, exciting and fun!!! If you do that, then kids will want to eat it. Healthy doesn't have to be boring or plain. Have a party with your taste buds.

fitmommy2012

I can see where you are coming from on this. I am a mom to a 5 year old little boy, as well as running my own daycare where I watch 6-7 kids per day. I am all for healthy eating and really want to encourage my son (and the kids in my care) to eat healthy. I am not super restrictive with him, I allow him to indulge (probably more than I should) but I try to also cook healthy meals and provide him with healthy snacks, as well as encourage him to exercise. We try to go for family walk/jogs and do things where we can all be active together.

drangonfly2323

As a mother and one whom grew up with poor eating habits, I do encourage healthy eating habits at home. While I was never overweight as a child, I do believe that being raised on a very unhealthy diet made it hard for me once I became an adult and it took me many years to change this habit. So I have taken what I learned and have applied it to my daughter's upbringing. However, I dont deny her sweets and other unhealthy snacks but they are not a staple in my household. I feel lucky that when I go to restaurants my child ask for broccoli as her side dish and if there is a second a salad. I dont judge other households and how they chose to raise their kids but I have confidence that raising my kid with a healthy view of food and making smart choices will be of a great benefit to her when she is an adult.

lisalsd1

I was overweight as a kid too. I do have kids now. I don't disagree with you. It was very hard for me to change the eating habits that I had learned.

The best thing you can do for your kids is lead by example. Even if you tell your kids to "eat their veggies," but you don't do it...they are going to follow your example no matter what you say.

It's not a great idea to restrict your kids' calories per say, BUT you can provide healthy snacks and make eating whole foods a normal part of life.