Scared to go to gym alone

Elinat4

I signed up at a gym two months ago and I have gone few times but never alone. I enjoy being alone but something about being at the gym alone scares me. It sounds really stupid but it bothers me that something like this is making me not go to the gym so I thought I ask to see if anyone else had this problem and how they got over it. I go hiking at least once a week alone and I don't mind it but I rather have someone there to talk to while hiking so the time passes by faster. I think what scares me the most at the gym is the lifting weights part because I don't mind doing the cardio alone but every time I go to do weights even with a friend I only see maximum 3 women there and the rest are all men that stare at you like you don't belong there. Maybe they just look at everyone but I feel uncomfortable for some reason and the worst part is some of the machines require you to take the old weights out and put in new ones which most of the time I can't even carry out because the weights are extremely heavy. When I go with my guy friend he just takes the weight out for me and I put in my lighter weights. This isn't the biggest issue for me thought because I can just skip the machines that require you to phisically take out the weights. Just in general though I feel very uncomfortable being alone there because of the way people look at me when I go to lift weights. When I go with someone I don't mind because I focus only on that person and I don't feel nervous or scared. There has been many time where I told my self who cares what other people think or say and that I should just go to the gym alone because I'm there to loose a lil weight and get fit but something stops me from going. I really want to go alone because when I go with other people they might not want to do the same workout as I do or they want to work out at a certain time that doesn't work for me. Anyone have any advise that can help me get over this ridiculous fear I have.

4legsRbetterthan2

I go to do weights even with a friend I only see maximum 3 women there and the rest are all men that stare at you like you don't belong there.

As you said, at your gym it does not seem to be commong for women to lift, but that does not mean you do not belong there. If thats what they think then they can shove it. Most likely they are just curious since you are a new face around or, you are female, and they are male, sooooo yeah

Maybe they just look at everyone but I feel uncomfortable for some reason and the worst part is some of the machines require you to take the old weights out and put in new ones which most of the time I can't even carry out because the weights are extremely heavy.

1. not re-racking your weights is kinda a faux pas at the gym so this should not be a problem, you can mention it to management and they can mention it to memebers or put up a sign
2. ask for help, I am sure some big muscly dude would love to show you what he is made of

The bottom line here is you are in a new environment and out of your comfort zone, and yes that sucks, but thats just one of those things that happens in life. Get in there, get educated, and soon enough you will feel just fine. Its just like going to school, your fist day of kindergarden I am sure you were freaking out, but after a week you made a few friends and got the hang of things.

hbwright74

I had no problem racking the weights. The biggest is 45 pounds so I would double arm it and take it off the rack, even though there are signs up and people are supposed to unrack their own. But....I do know the intimidation. I was FAT and old in a place where I looked like an alien. I kept at it and now just a short few months later I belong there. I've not only lost close to 30 pounds, but my strength has increased. I OWN that part of the gym and so do you.

WrenTheCoffeeAddict

Take that feeling and use it to fuel your workout.
I am one of less than a handful of women who hit the weights area of the gym, and seeing the look on their face when they see me picking up the larger of the dumbells is brilliant to me, they're surprised.

yopeeps025

Honestly men will look at women at the gym. Testosterone makes men stronger and is helpful to us building more muscle. I would not put you down or anything like that. We are there for one reason and that is to better ourselves. Men who look at women like they do not belong there are sissies.

leggup

You sound self conscious. Isn't that the whole point of going to the gym? To work on you, not worry about what other people think, say, or do?

You "belong" in the weights area because you paid to be there. Why not bring some music with you so that you can deal with the lonlies? Make a nice playlist?

As for moving the heavy weights, honestly it sounds like you're uncomfortable going to the gym in general and you're using this as an excuse, a "I hate this, but also it's hard to move the weights!" If it's a legitimate problem, ask someone at the front desk/one of the staff to help you move the weights. They will probably put up signs reminding people to rerack their weights. The longer you go to the gym, the easier it will be to rerack if someone else forgot.

It may not work for everyone, but I bully myself into doing things that are outside of my comfort zone. I've never had a problem with the gym, but I am an avid swing dancer who recently moved to a new area without any friends to dance with. I even picked a new type of dance. To make myself go to the first class, I bullied myself, "What is the worst that could happen? You fall? You fart in the middle of the class? You step on someone's feet? Could you live with that? Would the world continue spinning?"

Put it in perspective. Are you using your friends' schedules/not wanting to go alone as an excuse? Would you rather make yourself slightly uncomfortable/self conscious for a few months and be more fit, or stay in your comfort zone and have your fitness stagnate?

ShellF415

I was in exactly the same position. As far as racking the weights, usually someone on staff can show you how to do it and will do it until you are comfortable. I was SO intimidated at first and felt like I was being judged but you tend to see the same people every day and trust me, if you show up and do your thing consistently, they will just respect you for your consistency and progress. Everyone was a beginner once.

yopeeps025

I was in exactly the same position. As far as racking the weights, usually someone on staff can show you how to do it and will do it until you are comfortable. I was SO intimidated at first and felt like I was being judged but you tend to see the same people every day and trust me, if you show up and do your thing consistently, they will just respect you for your consistency and progress. Everyone was a beginner once.

+1 then they will start to see the results and compliment you.