Trusting Food Again and Daily Weighing

jess1992uga

Hey MFPers--
Sorry I am making another post, but this community...you all are blessings and so honest and non-judgmental...so thank you.

I am recovering from an eating disorder (well several) I have had since I was 6 (I am 21 now). Currently, my battle is to overcome anorexia. A big part of this...and one I committed to changing...is weighing myself every day...but problem is...daily weighing has become part of my recovery too and so I have what may be a completely illogical question..but i figure some "normies" (ie people without my crazy mind) could help point me to sanity.

I am currently taking a break from gaining weight so I can focus on gaining back trust of food and my body. This is because I came to find out I was scared of over 300 foods and gaining weight wasn't helping. I am just maintaining till Aug and then will be gaining again, but during this time am supposed to be facing these foods, trying restaraunts, and trying desserts. All to show myself my body isn't an exception and food isn't the enemy. That certain foods won't make me gain weight and that maintainance will be possible for me (I have been deadly underweight but also morbidly obese when I was 14...so I am scared those are my only two options).

This is where scale comes in. I face new foods every day and my next day weigh-in is kind of my pay off. My chance to see if those foods made me gain or not. But I am also starting to see I don't have the mental strength to realized the difference between fluxing and gaining and so I need to step away from daily weighing. Starting with not weighing tomorrow (don't worry your answer won't change my decision). Problem is...I faced two big fear foods tonight...mahi-mahi and cantaloupe. Oh and a large bagel. My mind is telling me if I wait till weigh till Wed it won't reflect if these foods affect my body...because tomorrow (Tues) could undo any gain they cause. That weight on Wed only reflect impact of foods I eat Tues, but never Mon. I think I know the right answer, but hearing from someone else help. Is this true? Will Wed only reflect Tues..or would it reflect both Mon and Tues?

It's silly too because I worked out today and I know if I weighed tom (tues) and weight was down my mind would say only because exercise and would have to wait till Wed to really know. That Wed weight would go back up and reflect true reality. This is the insanity of an eating disorder. You just can't win in your own mind. So I need genius minds like yourselves to help me. What day/food will Wed weigh-in reflect. Would it reflect all days in between previous weigh in, or just food from the day before? Thanks!

jess1992uga

Basically just need to know whether I can use Wed weigh-in to trust foods from today or can only use it to judge foods from day before?

stealthq

Your weight reflects multiple days of eating plus your activity and, being female, that will be further confounded by monthly hormone cycles. The more volume you eat, the more food is making its way through your gut. You'll see that reflected in your weight. It can take up to a week to ditch water retention from a particularly high sodium meal or an increase in activity. There are many other complicating factors as well.

What I'm trying to say is that looking at one day to judge your progress from that day or the day before is not going to work. You need to record your weight everyday if that is part of your recovery and look at week- and month-long trends. As long as the overall trend is moving in the direction you want to go, then you're good. The chart will have significant spikes and valleys from day to day. That's normal. Do not react to those or you'll end up chasing your tail. Only longer term trends matter. Make any adjustments to your diet based on those.

jess1992uga

Yeah I downloaded Libra and have been using that and its starting to make me learn and realize weight isn't linear as I had thought. It's so hard letting a body by a body and fluctuate because I am so used to controlling it. I guess I will just have to wait till Wed and see what happens then. Who knew skipping just one day of weighing could be so hard. Guess it shows I really need it. Even if this week I just skip one day instead of the three (Thurs and Sat) I had planned...will be huge progress. Thanks for your kind words. Guess the insanity was in ever thinking my next day weight solely reflected the previous days intake when it reflects so much more and thus trend is really better determination of if I am maintaining.