is it bad of me...?

NikkisNewStart

Ok I have never actually said this in person- but is it bad of me that I derive satisfaction in knowing that I look a gazillion times better than my husband's mean ex wife? She has 1 child who is with us half of the time... I have 4 (2 from previous marriage, 2 from my husband) and I teach full time and am in my last semester of Grad school. I am working my booty off and I just want to look at her (she is obese and has in turn fed my stepdaughter unhealthy foods and kept her in a sedentary lifestyle) and scream "what is YOUR Excuse?!?." She belittled my husband when they were married when he adopted a healthy lifestyle. I just get a sick inner satisfaction knowing I have every "excuse" possible to be overweight but I choose to work my butt off and be healthy and she doesn't. This probably isn't a typical success post! Should I feel bad for my inner gloating? I kind of do in a way. I would never think this way about anyone else, just her b/c she is a biznatch and is turning my stepdaughter into her "mini me" and it makes me angry b/c I know how it affects her self esteem and I don't want that lifelong battle for her.

hpsnickers1

sounds to me like she would rub it in your face if the situations were reversed so I say go for it.

NikkisNewStart

I just get a smirk on my face when I see her... but I feel bad b/c I wish she would get healthy so my stepdaughter wouldn't have to suffer at the hands of food her whole life.

diazgrisel

Encourage her to lose weight. No one likes to be in bad shape. Give a helping hand it might unify your family and make you into a real good model for you kids.

FemininGuns

I would say that it takes more energy to harvest these feelings than letting them go... You may see your weight melting off even more if you learn to accept her as she is.

Degren

What you are feeling is very normal. You probably should not share your feelings with your stepdaughter though. Just be a positive force in her life, and show her the advantages of your lifestyle. Give her the tools she needs to be healthy, even if she is not using them right now. Kids see and absorb more than we know.

Also - Great Job on your awesome weight loss!!

CDresp

Just keep setting a good example for your step daughter. Kids are smart. She will realize eventually who is happier with herself and who is miserable. Keep giving her that positive input and she should be fine.