Overcoming food anxiety + Maintaining

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Hello everyone...I'm still kind of confused about the way MFP works but I've been doing what I can. I am almost to my goal weight and I'm really proud of myself because I haven't weighed 125 in about 4 years due to suffering a tragedy a few years ago and just general depression, etc. I've been busting my butt so I'm happy to be seeing results.

I started out at 1200 calories a day and that was way too little so I lost most of my weight by eating 1470 calories a day and exercising and burning about 400-500 calories a day. I hardly ever eat back my exercise calories and I still don't know if I'm supposed to?

Anyway, I got hungry and since I'm pretty much where I want to be fitness / weight wise (5'4, 125-127lbs) I switched to a goal of maintaining my weight. MFP allows me 1850 calories a day because I said I am lightly active, which seems like a lot (even though in reality it's probably not). Nowadays I usually burn anywhere from 500-800 calories a day and I usually don't eat my exercise calories back.

I'm just anxious about gaining back the weight. Today I burned almost 900 calories or so, and yet I was freaking out because I ate 1830 of my daily calories and I hate going over my goal or even getting too close to it. I was really craving a little debbie brownie, I couldn't help myself.

I hate this unhealthy relationship I have with food and I hate the constant anxiety about what to eat. I know this is a lifestyle change so I need to get used to days when I want brownies or pizza, but I don't get this anxiety I've developed. Why can't it be as simple as eating and exercising? Any advice or encouragement?

Replies

  • nxd10
    nxd10 Posts: 4,570 Member
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    First, congratulations.

    One of the nice things about MFP is that it can give you data to help you not freak it. If it gave you a good method to lose weight successfully - i.e., you said you wanted to lose a pound a week, ate what you were supposed to, and did - it should work for maintenance too.

    Keep logging your food. if you're anxious, use what MFP gives you as a top limit. You can eat up to that amount with no worries. Do that for a month without weighing if you like.

    If, at the end of the month, you've gained more than daily fluctuation (2 pounds maybe?) stick with those calories. If you have lost some, up your eating or your calories.

    Personally, I find it less anxiety producting to weigh every day, but just now you will bounce around a few pounds every day. Look at trends, not single daily events. There's no way you really gained several pounds of fat in a day.
  • PaytraB
    PaytraB Posts: 2,360 Member
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    Congratulations on reaching your goal weight!

    You've learned the tools required for weight control. You've learned about portions, the amounts you can eat, etc. Now's the time to trust what you learned.
    Keep logging but don't concentrate so much on reaching an actual number of calories. Relax a little bit. If you're hungry, eat reasonably. If you'd like a treat, have a Little Debbie brownie. Log everything. On some days you'll be over; on others you'll be under your calorie goal. At the end of the week, you'll find that you're average daily calorie consumption is within your calorie goal. Each day is different (some are hungrier than others) but in the end you'll be within your goals. This is the tool you learned while losing.

    Try it for a month or so. Log everything. Weigh in once in awhile (often enough to see that you are maintaining but not often enough that you obsess). A 3-5 lb. fluctuation is normal. Maintenance is a range of weight, not an exact weight on the scales. You need to find what works for you and don't obsess.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
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    Congratulations on reaching your goal weight!

    You've learned the tools required for weight control. You've learned about portions, the amounts you can eat, etc. Now's the time to trust what you learned.
    Keep logging but don't concentrate so much on reaching an actual number of calories. Relax a little bit. If you're hungry, eat reasonably. If you'd like a treat, have a Little Debbie brownie. Log everything. On some days you'll be over; on others you'll be under your calorie goal. At the end of the week, you'll find that you're average daily calorie consumption is within your calorie goal. Each day is different (some are hungrier than others) but in the end you'll be within your goals. This is the tool you learned while losing.

    Try it for a month or so. Log everything. Weigh in once in awhile (often enough to see that you are maintaining but not often enough that you obsess). A 3-5 lb. fluctuation is normal. Maintenance is a range of weight, not an exact weight on the scales. You need to find what works for you and don't obsess.

    This sounds like the advice I was looking for.

    I am changing my goal weight today to my current weight. I've decided that it will be the best for me in the long range. I am 67, 129lb, 24%BF, have myself listed as active, and have been losing about .5lb a week, recently. I would like to have a range of 126 - 132. While losing I've been weighing myself every other week and figured I would keep that up.
  • epadmeister
    epadmeister Posts: 102 Member
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    First, congratulations.

    One of the nice things about MFP is that it can give you data to help you not freak it. If it gave you a good method to lose weight successfully - i.e., you said you wanted to lose a pound a week, ate what you were supposed to, and did - it should work for maintenance too.

    Keep logging your food. if you're anxious, use what MFP gives you as a top limit. You can eat up to that amount with no worries. Do that for a month without weighing if you like.

    If, at the end of the month, you've gained more than daily fluctuation (2 pounds maybe?) stick with those calories. If you have lost some, up your eating or your calories.

    Thank goodness I'm not alone in this whole "anxious / guilty about maintenance" situation. I really needed to read this thread :) I'm confident that MFP calories set will work for my maintenance now! Thanks guys!
  • nyiballs
    nyiballs Posts: 147
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    You are confusing me when you say your are burning 900 calories... I'm assuming you mean via exercise?

    The BMR of a 5'4" 127 lb woman (I used age 35 because you didn't disclose and it's a decent midpoint for MFP users) is roughly 1350.
    That means if you were to sit on your tush all day doing absolutely nothing, you'd burn 1350 just by being alive.

    If you are exercising for 500-900 calories per day, you can add that on top, or just as well, calculate your total daily energy expenditure (TDEE).
    A TDEE for the age and demos above for someone who leads a lightly active lifestyle and works out lightly 3 days a week is roughly 1850.

    In short, if you average 1850 calories per day over the long haul, you'll maintain. That's all there is to it. That's probably why MFP is giving you your 1850 budget. Like the others have said, you'll have your high days and your low days... look at your calories in larger blocks... that's how you'll be able to enjoy an ice cream sundae Friday night, but bear down with salad for lunch and dinner on Sunday.
  • cece5300
    cece5300 Posts: 48
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    Thanks, everyone!! I feel a lot better. Glad to have this community to reach out to :)

    Yes, I meant I exercised and burned 900 calories. Some days I burn 500, some days I burn 800, depends what I have time for. And I'm 28. I'm assuming I'm hungrier lately because I'm burning more calories exercising; I have a desk job and am usually otherwise pretty sedentary, but I try to squeeze in at the very least an hour of exercise a day, and on average 90 minutes a day. I think my problem is that even though I set my calories to maintenance level, I still got anxious when I got past my original allotted amount of 1470 calories. After months of blood, sweat and tears to lose weight it's hard to break the habit I guess.

    Thanks for your responses! You've all been great
  • nyiballs
    nyiballs Posts: 147
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    I too have an office job that some days has me sitting at a desk for 8-9 hours. After getting my fitbit, I soon realized how different my total burn was on different days. I run or do p90x3 every day to help offset the sedentary nature of some work days.

    But, I've also realized that while I can adjust what I eat day to day based on my activity, it is just as effective, if not moreso, to look at what I'm burning on a weekly basis, and try to stay consistent on my eating day to day based on the weekly average.
  • proudjmmom
    proudjmmom Posts: 145 Member
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    I had the same relationship with food that you are describing. I hit my goal of 125lbs in November, giving me a 90lbs weight loss. I tried to maintain, but I found it very difficult to eat more, and be ok with it. I upped my calories slowly when I was within 5-8lbs of my goal. I continued increasing, until I stopped losing weight. I lost a further 9lbs, then my body finally settled.

    I had to change my unhealthy habits/relationship with food. I started slow, I stopped weighing my food first. I mean, After 3 years (i lost all my weight over a 3 year period), I should have learned a thing or 2 about healthy portions, have a general idea what I can and can't eat, and how much I can eat through the run of a day. I did that for a while, and weighed myself daily, to keep tabs on my weight. I allowed for a 3-5lbs window.

    Eventually I made the decision to stop logging period. It was a very difficult decision to make, but for me, it was a way of changing the way I felt about food. I struggled the hardest the first few days, then it got better. I continued to weigh daily, and done well with it.

    I don't always make 100% good choices, but I feel like this is a lifestyle change not just temporary, and I need to be able to live like this for the rest of my life to keep my weight off.
  • nyiballs
    nyiballs Posts: 147
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    The stop logging thing is certainly something I fear at this point at the tail end of my weight loss.
  • PaytraB
    PaytraB Posts: 2,360 Member
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    The stop logging thing is certainly something I fear at this point at the tail end of my weight loss.

    This is a scary transition. I logged for almost a year after reaching goal weight and slowly relaxed (little by little).
    Start looking at weekly daily average calories instead of each, individual day's worth of calories. It's the more "normal" way of eating since on some days we'll (technically) over eat; on others we will (technically) under eat depending upon so many factors in our lives (some days are busier, sometimes we're ill, sometimes we party, etc). But if you're weekly daily average is good, your weight will be good.
    After a few months of reasonable weigh-ins, I stopped logging but kept an eye on portions. So far, so good.
    I recently logged for a few weeks while on vacation. I wanted to make sure I wasn't going overboard with the good times. :smile: It was to keep me honest and aware.

    I think, for all of us, we've learned the lessons and we can do this IF we continue to be aware of what we put in our mouths and remember to listen to the cues.

    Not logging is scary but we've learned the tools of weight management. Go slowly, do it a step at a time as comfort permits.