I'm ready to give up

LisasLastTen

I know you've heard this a dozen times, but I'm about ready to give up on dieting / exercise.

According to MyFitnessPal a girl like me can eat a meager 1200/calories a day if she wants to lose weight. I try to do that, but it's very, very difficult. And while I can monitor my calories pretty well during the work week, it is almost impossible to keep to 1200 calories when I spend time with my daughters.

And while I want to smile and eat my kale salad, I'm sick of chicken, spinach, and Lean Cuisine. And the worst thing is that I will work out hard, five days a week and monitor every bite that goes into my mouth to lose a half pound a week. And if, after losing a couple of pounds, I decide to have popcorn at the theater or split a slice of cake with the kids I will immediately gain back everything I struggled to lose.

I'm tired of feeling like I can't even eat like a normal human being. Can I afford 130 calorie yogurt? Probably not. And sorry, too many calories in almonds - can't eat them. I don't date because I don't want to seem shallow and obsessive by tracking every bite that goes into my mouth. I tell myself I'll get back out and date when I reach my goal weight (125) but I just don't think it will ever happen. It hasn't happened after four years of trying.

I thought things would get better after I had sling surgery... Now I'm not embarrassed by accidents at the gym, but my body is acting very "middle-aged" all the sudden. I recently spent a week unable to sleep well because of a bout of bursitis, probably brought on by over-working myself at the gym.

I'm at the point where I just don't believe it's possible to lose my "last ten pounds" without surgery. I'm tired of spending every day worrying obsessively about my weight. Have any of you been through the same struggles? Is anyone willing to look at my diet prior to this week (I have been vacationing with my daughters) and see if anything is obviously wrong?

I know I've been cheating this week, but I just can't imagine NEVER enjoying food again. Surely I can cheat every once in a while, right?

I don't eat back my calories (according to FitBit) yet I still weigh the same day in and day out (except when I eat too much salt and temporarily gain 3 pounds or more).

Do any of you feel me? Please don't tell me to suck it up and quit whining... there's no reason I should be dieting off and on for four years and not lose a single pound. (I lost 20 pounds in 2009 and can't seem to get back on track. Of course, in 2009, I was in a war zone and living off chicken and broccoli. Should I go back to chicken and broccoli for a couple of months and just stop socializing all together? Should I stop having pancakes with my daughters and find the strength to eat egg whites while I'm flipping hot cakes for them?)

Am I rambling at this point? :-)

nyiballs

First off, it's time to stop thinking about "dieting." Anything you do should be sustainable over the long haul.

I was very much in your boat... Crash dieting and eating 1200-1400 a day and thinking I would never get to enjoy food again. Eventually I came to realize that my journey was a marathon, not a sprint. I could rock a 10,000 calorie deficit each week, lose 3 pounds, and feel terrible and miserable, or I could shoot for a 3500 deficit, have some treats, and feel better while losing 1 pound.

Don't weigh yourself after a treat or popcorn! You know that's just sodium and water weight.

Be vigilant and honest while tracking your food... Avoid the calorie creep. It's easy to leave out 15 calories here and 20 there, and not realize where you are.

It's so friggin tough. As a food addict, my primary purpose of eating food used to be the enjoyment. As such, it was impossible to moderate and control portions. Changing to a mindset of food being fuel took months. And I still struggle every day. Just commit to a larger timeframe. Look at calories on a weekly basis instead of daily. That will allow you some more flexibility. Decide which treats are really worth the calories. I love donuts... Love em. But the 5 seconds of enjoyment aren't worth the calories in my budget more than maybe once a month now. But I've learned to replace that enjoyment with other things... Whether it's healthy foods, activity, playing with my kids.

I empathize. But it can be done. I went from 4000-5000 calories a day not even realizing how much I was eating, to struggling to hit 2000 calories while eating almost as much as I want. Share your diary with others and see what they are eating.

TheVirgoddess

I know you've heard this a dozen times, but I'm about ready to give up on dieting / exercise.

According to MyFitnessPal a girl like me can eat a meager 1200/calories a day if she wants to lose weight. I try to do that, but it's very, very difficult. And while I can monitor my calories pretty well during the work week, it is almost impossible to keep to 1200 calories when I spend time with my daughters.

And while I want to smile and eat my kale salad, I'm sick of chicken, spinach, and Lean Cuisine. And the worst thing is that I will work out hard, five days a week and monitor every bite that goes into my mouth to lose a half pound a week. And if, after losing a couple of pounds, I decide to have popcorn at the theater or split a slice of cake with the kids I will immediately gain back everything I struggled to lose.

I'm tired of feeling like I can't even eat like a normal human being. Can I afford 130 calorie yogurt? Probably not. And sorry, too many calories in almonds - can't eat them. I don't date because I don't want to seem shallow and obsessive by tracking every bite that goes into my mouth. I tell myself I'll get back out and date when I reach my goal weight (125) but I just don't think it will ever happen. It hasn't happened after four years of trying.

I thought things would get better after I had sling surgery... Now I'm not embarrassed by accidents at the gym, but my body is acting very "middle-aged" all the sudden. I recently spent a week unable to sleep well because of a bout of bursitis, probably brought on by over-working myself at the gym.

I'm at the point where I just don't believe it's possible to lose my "last ten pounds" without surgery. I'm tired of spending every day worrying obsessively about my weight. Have any of you been through the same struggles? Is anyone willing to look at my diet prior to this week (I have been vacationing with my daughters) and see if anything is obviously wrong?

I know I've been cheating this week, but I just can't imagine NEVER enjoying food again. Surely I can cheat every once in a while, right?

I don't eat back my calories (according to FitBit) yet I still weigh the same day in and day out (except when I eat too much salt and temporarily gain 3 pounds or more).

Do any of you feel me? Please don't tell me to suck it up and quit whining... there's no reason I should be dieting off and on for four years and not lose a single pound. (I lost 20 pounds in 2009 and can't seem to get back on track. Of course, in 2009, I was in a war zone and living off chicken and broccoli. Should I go back to chicken and broccoli for a couple of months and just stop socializing all together? Should I stop having pancakes with my daughters and find the strength to eat egg whites while I'm flipping hot cakes for them?)

Am I rambling at this point? :-)

Stop treating this as a diet. Look at my diary, it's public. Today I had chinese food for dinner, and some pretzel bites and a coke icee. Don't eat "diet" food or you'll be miserable. Eat food you enjoy, just eat less of it.

How much weight are you trying to lose? The 20 pounds? If so, your loss per week goal is set WAY too high. You should be trying to lose about a half a pound a week. I'm at .5 pounds a week and I'm looking to lose another 45 pounds or so.

Find some sort of exercise/activity that you love (mine's running). Make sure you're logging EVERYTHING and have a good handle on portion sizes (I use a food scale).

If you need a friend to help keep you motivated, shoot me a request.

Don't give up though - you're worth it.

LisasLastTen

Thank you for being so positive, nyiballs :-)

I realize I'm probably just a little frustrated right now because I'm spending a week with my daughters which makes it difficult to go to the gym and harder to watch my diet.

And when I'm completely honest with myself I know I don't track EVERY calorie. For example, I don't mark down my gummy vitamins I have almost every night. But I don't track my exercise either. (If I run and burn 300 calories on the treadmill or 300 on the elliptical I usually don't add that to my calorie count.)

It might also help if I tried to have friends or date or something. I spend a vast majority of my time alone, so food is about the only thing I look forward to... that and The Colbert Report.

And I'm not sure I should be weighing myself every single morning... I worry I'm too obsessive about this - which may be partly due to my own isolation.

irleshay

Maybe 1200 is too low for you. MFP told me to eat 1200 when I was losing, and I flatly refused to. I think I started at 1800 and gradually weaned myself down to 1400, but I exercised 4 days a week back then so I often ate over 2000. These days I maintain at 1700, and I eat back exercise calories. But maybe bump it up a bit higher from 1200. Sure, it'll supposedly take longer for you to lose, but it sounds like what you're doing right now isn't working. Don't give up! Try a different approach.

LisasLastTen

If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, I guess I should change something...

So I reduced the amount of weight I want to lose from a pound a week to half a pound a week.

It seems counter-intuitive to increase the amount of calories I'm allowed each day, but maybe this will keep me more honest. After all, it was really difficult to eat 1200/day so I would just eat more and not care that I went over. Maybe I'll be more likely to obey the red line if it's set a little higher.

And while I know this is a very controversial topic, I do believe that you can eat so few calories that you have no energy to work out and actually cause your metabolism to slump. Logically, this is all math, calories in vs. calories out, but our bodies work in unusual ways. Maybe being stricter with calorie counts and aiming a tiny bit higher (1320 vs 1200) will help somehow.

danaaae

I typed up a long reply and then accidentally deleted it...but basically I agree with the others. I eat what I want as long as I stay under my calorie goal for the day. Mine is 1600/day, up to 1700 on the days I lift. I found my calorie goal by calculating my TDEE and subtracting 20%. You can find more information about that here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/931670-bmr-and-tdee-explained-for-those-needing-a-guide

I already know that blacklisting my favorite foods in order to lose weight is not sustainable for me over a lifetime. I still eat my donuts and ice cream, cookies, or whatever. I just don't eat as much of it. Over time it has become easier to stay under that calorie goal and say no to the donuts. I usually have a donut (or two) once a week and I don't beat myself up over it. So...continue eating the foods you enjoy, just do so in moderation :-)

I have also been obsessed with the scale and it controlled how I felt each and every day (horrible I know!). I started out by having my daughter hide it and only bringing it out once a week. Nowadays, as long as I'm tracking as I should and my clothing isn't getting any tighter that scale stays tucked away and I will only weigh once a month. Besides, I'm weight lifting now, so the inch loss will show up quicker than weight loss, and I believe that is exactly what is beginning to happen. I am almost 5'2" and would like to lose about 25 pounds but as long as I look and feel good I can live with not hitting my idea of goal weight.

I have been down the 1200 calorie road. Some can do it, but it was not for me. I will take the slow loss over feeling hungry and angry any day (that's what 1200 calories did to me!). Whatever you do, don't give up! Find an exercise you really enjoy and keep at it!

LisasLastTen

Thanks, jameyjay (I hope I spelled that right). And I appreciate hearing from someone who's on the petite side like I am. (I think it's tough for those of us under 5'5" or so to lose weight.)

brittaney0625

Sorry you are struggling. It is so hard! I totally understand how you feel.
What I do know is that you CAN do this.. giving up can't be an option. Try eating more.. don't make yourself feel starved and deprived. If I am CRAVING something like crazy.. i have it.. and just have it in moderation and move on. I learned a long time ago that when I try to 'diet' and I completely restrict myself then I get frustrated and then it leads to giving up.

Pancake alternative = sweet potato pancakes. YUM!

Everyone does this weight loss differently. Find what will work for you and is something you can maintain.

We all fall down, just get back up.

Start logging your time on the elliptical. It will (if you choose to do it this way) allow you more calories for the day as well.

If you feel you do everything perfect and your getting now change.. maybe try changing up your work out?

Good luck!!

DebbieLyn63

How tall are you? You might be at an ok weight for now and just need to work on body composition now instead of a number on the scale.
If you DO have fat you still need to lose, try changing up your diet.
Increase protein and lower carbs a bit. Many of us ladies find we need fewer carbs as we age and our hormones change.

Or zig zag your calorie levels. Look into 5:2 fasting where you create your deficit for the week by eating 500 for 2 nonconsecutive days, then eat at maintenance the rest of the week. This can give you more flexibility in your diet.

Hang in there!

rachdlew

Eating right has been an issue for me. I love love love food and i love to cook it even more. When I made the decision to get healthier and eat better I started revamping recipes. I cut calories every where I could and it still tasted amazing. There are a lot of things that I started to make at home instead of buying. I cut out all high fructose corn syrup and that made a big difference. You dont have to give up your love of food to lose weight you just have to find a way to make it your own and healthy. Oh and I also saw that you were not eating back the calories that you were burning. I am losing weight and my trainer has told me that I was to eat back every calorie I burn. I hope this helps a bit and good luck to you.

Naughty_ZOOT

It is not popular with some people on here but I stopped dieting after losing no weight for the last 20 years no matter what I did. Talk about frustrating! I also was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and possible hypothyroid. So, after trying to eat lots of whole grains, lean meats, lots of veggies and fruits all of 2013 despite small servings, feeling deprived and with roller coaster blood sugar readings I was rewarded with my highest blood glucose ever in 12 years and a new prescription for Victoza which can cause pancreatic cancer. That did it. I was angry at the medical establishment for throwing another drug my way so it galvanized me to start researching. I KNEW that there had to be something out there somewhere that would work for me. I mean, I couldn't be the only one that had this problem and I knew it. So I started Googling ways to lower my glucose. Lower glucose meant lower weight; I knew that much. Diabetes is extremely strong in my Dad's side of the family so this was going to benefit others including my own children if I found a solution.

My research led me first to Dr. Bernstein's Diabetes Solution which no physician ever mentioned to me (grrrr) and I read it. He is a type 1 since age 12 and is nearly 80 now. He advocated carbohydrate restriction so I decided that no kind of bread or grain product (pizza to cookies) was worth an amputation, heart attack or death. I started to drop my carb consumption and tested every food's effects on my blood sugar per his protocols. That last bit is what really showed me for the first time what my particular food culprits were. If something spiked my sugar I kicked it out the door. In my case I found that I am extremely carbohydrate sensitive and any type of grain (including oats) spiked me. Most dairy spiked me, fruits spiked me and starchy veggies like potatoes, sweet potatoes, winter squash, corn or root veggies to some extent. I found that what I had been told by the establishment, that is to eat whole grains and low fat, was competently wrong for my body and I had the lab results to prove that it was leading me down the path of serious complications all while being "cared" for by my doctors. I had to be responsible for my own health and I got angrier which further motivated me. The doctors were just overpaid drug pushers who had no interest in curing me; they only treated my symptoms and wanted me on a drug merry-go-round. No way.

I followed Dr. Bernstein's book for 2 months before my next doctor visit. My HbA1C dropped from 7.9 to 6.5 in that short time and I had lost 17 lbs without changing anything else at that time. I continued to test, log my foods and research because now my interest was piqued. For once in my life I finally started to understand the "why" of things that messed with my body and understanding that made all of the difference. I was no longer in the dark and floundering around. I bought Wheat Belly, Grain Brain, and several more books. I researched heavily. I learned a lot. I am still doing that at almost 6 months into this journey.

Today I am now one month into an experiment with low carb/high fat to see what that would do. I found that my body needs this, and experimenting with a low carb/high fat protocol has yielded amazing things already. I have lost only 3 more pounds so far but I have been very sedentary lately and I am still experimenting with foods which is slow and can have negative effects but in the end I will have my knowledge of what is good and what is not. Now, don't get the wrong idea; I eat a huge variety of wonderful whole foods. I am also off of all diabetic medications with nearly normal blood sugar readings. I cannot begin to describe how much energy I have now, I am always in a happy mood, I never go too low on blood sugar and I only spike when a new food test is unsuccessful. If that happens, it is out of my diet. I crave no carbs whatsoever. I no longer eat sugar of any kind and I honestly don't care. That is astounding because I had a major sweet tooth before but I know now that I was addicted to them thanks to food enhancers by big food taking unfair advantage of my body chemistry. I don't recall giving anyone permission to use me as a human guinea pig. I have learned to substitute for most anything quite well and I feel no hunger between meals whatsoever, I sleep well for the first time in a decade, I was a horrible night owl and now wake naturally with the sunrise (that in itself is a mini miracle), I no longer have IBS or GERD issues, I used to regurgitate food when burping- no more. My dry skin is gone, no more dark circles or bags under my eyes. I have to make sure that I eat enough calories because this protocol over time diminishes hunger because you no longer are on a carb roller coaster with eating then hunger then repeating. I eat very low carbs (only vegetables to get nutrients that I want), moderate protein of any type and high healthy fats (coconut oil, olive oil, grass fed butter). I am sustained all day and satisfied. Purely satisfied. My lipids are better and my doctor said to keep on doing whatever it is that I am doing because he was impressed. Wait until he sees me in September!

I will tell you that you MUST research and learn so that you do it correctly if this interests you. It is not a fad diet, it is a lifestyle choice that some of us must do regardless but many do willingly. Those who say it is unhealthy or a fad are not educating themselves before they speak. Once you see the research you will see why this is a healthy genetic choice for most people.

Sweden officially made low carb/high fat their national dietary protocol late last year after reviewing over 16,000 studies on low carb/high fat protocols. If you read some of the books outlining the history of how we were all told to eat low fat/high complex carbs (politicians and journalists decided that one for us, not doctors) you will see that big food is even more evil than big tobacco because everyone eats. Gary Taubes' Good Calories, Bad Calories is a good starting point.

I also buy only organic produce now because there is a proven correlation between pesticide and herbicide use and diabetes, PCOS and metabolic syndrome. Commercial dairy has also been positively correlated with causing type 1 diabetes in children.I won't go into the details of why here but it is heinous at best. I am still switching over to 100% grass fed or free range meats and I buy only wild caught Pacific seafood. No Atlantic and no farm raised or imported from China. That is nasty stuff.

There is a learning curve but you have your whole life to make either good or bad choices for your own personal self. You are obviously interested but discouraged and I know that I was in your shoes 6 months ago. If what you are doing isn't working and you are miserable then you need to review why and change your protocols. Don't mindlessly trust the "experts" because even the ADA and AHA say low fat/high carb to this day despite the fact that they also tested low carb/high fat and endorsed that it worked! What is up with that??

I say that researching our food supply is like choosing the blue or red pill in the Matrix and my eyes were opened wide. My husband wanted to lose weight and bring his blood pressure down so he started with the low fat/high carb and cut calories despite what I was doing being the opposite. He lost only 11 lbs, was grouchy, completely miserable and always hungry. That was 3 months ago. Our kids complained and he just couldn't ignore my success with my weight, energy and blood glucose readings and decided to finally "cave" and try low carb/high fat 2 1/2 weeks ago. He has already lost another 16 lbs and 2 pant sizes with zero exercise so far. He says now that his biggest hurdle was the brainwashing of the old message. He is seeing his energy ramp up, is never hungry, is really enjoying his choices and is starting to see his blood pressure come down. He now hopes to get off of that medication and he is quite frankly, amazed.

You do not need carbohydrates to live or be healthy but you do need quality protein and healthy fat. They are essential to life. Saturated fat has been definitively proven to not be our enemy but big food actively tries to discredit the research because eating whole foods makes them no money. They cannot patent a food unless they make it GMO (and they do!). My lab results prove to me that I am doing a very good thing for my body and I will never be duped by big food or big pharma again. I see my father on a cocktail of over 25 drugs daily to manage his diabetes, neuropathy, depression, cardiovascular system, restless legs, arthritis, lumbar pain, and more. He is now showing signs of early dementia, too. What I have learned is that EVERY one of those conditions can be reduced or eliminated with the elimination of grains and excessive carb consumption but he is nearly 86 and set in his ways. He is getting more interested however so time will tell. I do NOT want to find myself in his shoes in 35 years from now. My brother, also a type 2, is going to give this a try and see if he can get control without drugs, too. I know other people who are not diabetic who have dropped grains (whether out of gluten sensitivity or just curiosity) and the pounds fall off. Dr. William Davis the cardiologist who wrote Wheat Belly says that his patients lose an average of 26 lbs just by eliminating grains from their diet and doing nothing else which tells you a lot right there. If nothing else, take away that eating those things is truly a mental addiction as well as physical. You will not die by eliminating them but you just might if you don't. I now consider myself well and truly free for the first time in my life and I am 51 looking forward to a full life. I went from feeling old and worn out to reversing the clock 30 years. I am energetic and happy. Best wishes!

cathylopez1975

I've been in your shoes before and it's tough! I've quit so many times. But this last time for some reason I have kept going and reached goal. I am 5'4" and 139 lbs - lost 95 lbs in 16 months and now working on maintaining. But I didn't do it by 'dieting' really. I've dieted all of my life and then quit dieting when I burned out.

So much of the weight battle is in our head. I know we all say it has to be achieved through lifestyle change. But how? When I started out this last time, I just decided I would learn to deal with food differently. I some how convinced myself that fruit was really yummy as well as veggies. I dropped almost all of the junk foods I enjoyed for a while so that I could get cravings under control. Now that I'm at goal I find I can eat many of the things I dropped in small portions, but I don't really care to. I had a small piece of chocolate with nuts in it last night and after I ate it I realized I would rather have just eaten the nuts. It just didn't do anything for me.

I did the 1200 calorie thing for a long time - it's hard! Sadly enough for me, since I'm 57 and fairly short my maintenance calories aren't great. I've started running so I can eat more. But I try to make sure I eat quality food - good proteins and fats, complex carbs, lots of fiber. Otherwise I get super hungry.

Hang in there. It's really worth it! Being at goal has been sooooooo great! You can do it!

DistantJ

I so feel you. Over a year ago, I found Zumba and deep water aerobics, developing a love for both. I went to Zumba 5x/week and Deep water aerobics at least once a week, but usually more. So in other words, I was exercising a LOT and at high-intensity. I was eating 1400 calories a day. In 6 months, I lost about 3 pounds. I could tell that I was in better shape, but I was still about 80 lbs overweight! Then I got pregnant, and thought that I would just continue with the Zumba and aerobics classes. To my surprise, I was sicker than a dog with that pregnancy (hadn't been with the previous 5) and pretty much spent the whole 9 months in bed. I didn't gain much weight (less than 10 lbs) due to tossing my cookies all the time, but I had severe sugar cravings when I could eat. Then when I gave birth, eating was SO FUN because I could do it without throwing up! YIPEE! So I gained the weight I should have gained while pregnant after he was born.

I got serious and set my calorie goal to 1200 and did okay sticking to that. I didn't exercise or change my eating habits. I lost 20-23 lbs and stopped for months. Didn't gain back, but couldn't seem to lose more to save my life.

I started having some weird health issues, and long story longer, I was told I was prediabetic by my doctor. Her advice? Give up sugar. Don't eat refined carbs. Watch carbs in general. Etc. I recommitted to 1200 calories a day and gave up sugar, refined carbs and started eating lots LOTS more veggies (sugar snap peas are my crack) and lean meats. Weight loss kicked back in!

I know it's controversial, but read and read again what LCHFftW99 posted here. GOOD STUFF! What works for YOU? Do some research and find out what works that you can live with!

I do feel for you on the whole "So WHAT? Do I NEVER get to enjoy food again??" thing! I had to work pretty hard on my attitude about that. The weight loss picking back up has helped. I keep telling myself that nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. Much of that time, I believe it. Mostly. Ahem.

I sure wish you the best. It's not easy, it's often frustrating, and I'm just hoping that in the end I'll be hot enough that it will be worth it. Friend me if you want. Best of luck!!

lessbounce

I know it's not easy I'm on 1200 cals a day too, personally I log all my exercise and if I'm hungry or want a treat (like the take away last night) I eat them. There is no way I could stick to it if I didn't also have those extra calories. Planning in treats is also key to me, I find you can cut back on a few other meals some times to fit them in.

I went away recent for a few days and didn't log but tried to always leave something on my plate (portions out are always about twice what I'd have at home) and had small glasses of wine instead of large ones etc. It definitely seemed to limit the damage.

Have a really good week with your daughters and when you get back try some of the suggestions people have made until you find one that suits you. Our bodies as wonderful as they are can be a bit mad - I know that if I eat bread there is no way on earth I will lose weight , I've just struggled my shoulders and excepted that one.

joepage612

I think you should eat back your calories. You said you don't, but then say you cheat sometimes, so im not sure what what that looks like on paper.
I eat all my calories back and it keeps me from being crazy hungry. If I eat back calories im FINE.
I think of calories as a type of money. like $. can't always get what you want. some things I can't afford. its sad but oh well. I don't have unlimited money and unlimited calorie limit. It's not fair but lifes not fair.
I eat what ever I want. But calories are like buying things, you can save up and get something really great but you cant have everything. If I binge at lunch I accept the fact im done for the day. Same as if I buy something from the store that leaves me broke.
It's true that it can be a drag recording your calories but its budgeting, just like with finances. Back when people wrote cheques, I would balance my chequebook as I wrote them out. If I don't keep track of my finances I get into trouble. Same with calories.
Thats my philosophy I hope it helps you in some way.
p.s.edit
restricting my food has improved my life I now enjoy what I get more than ever. I used to eat an entire pizza and think nothing of it. blah. Now I will look forward to 1 slice all day and its like a party when I get it. I enjoy food more than ever now.

Sf0rza

Don't even try to diet at 1200. It's very hard and you'll be miserable. Read a couple of the sticky posts, and switch up to about 1500 a day, carefully counted (there are more scientific ways of working it out but it's a good start.) Start reading your own food log to workI out where you're squandering calories on stuff that isn't satisfying. Your pancake breakfasts look quite high calorie to me, but if you love them, maybe reduce how often you have them.

You have to log carefully if you're trying to lose on higher calories but it's much easier to stick to. You also need to be patient and keep going. I've lost about 10 lb in 3.5 months. Some weeks it feels very very slow but it's working, and all the time I'm learning what i would need to eat to stay at this lower weight. I wasn't eating massively, but I was eating lots of little snacks, second helpings and so that were adding up to a lot of extra food. Good luck - get in there, you can do it!

Sf0rza

PS I am 4'11" and 52 years old. Calories are set to 1450 a day, but I average 1550. Losing= still possible when teeny and older.

Myhaloslipped

I have been where you are. It is frustrating, I know. I have no idea how people deal with 1200 calories per day unless they are extremely tiny or inactive. It sounds like torture. MFP is designed for you to eat back your exercise calories and still lose weight. As someone mentioned earlier, this is a marathon and not a sprint. If you try to do an extreme diet, you will most likely fail. If you have only 10 pounds left to lose, set your goal to one half pound per week and enjoy your food. I promise that it is doable. I am only 2 inches taller than you, and I am losing about .8 pounds per week at 2300 calories per day (this includes my exercise calories). Good luck!

LumberJacck

I've been there, we all have. You probably should know that only about 15% of people who attempt to lose weight will reach their goal weight (based on my keeping records of hundreds of weight loss bloggers), so it's a hard road that we all are walking.

You are bound to get lots of good advice on this question, as well as some conflicting advice.

All I can say is, when you feel like giving up, stop trying to lose weight. Hold it there for a while. The desire to lose weight waxes and wanes. Take a break if necessary.

But if you're having a break, try try and try some more to not gain. There is no point in losing the same pound or kilogram 10, 20 or 100 times.

_HeartsOnFire_

I started out on 1200+exercise calories and it worked for awhile, until it didn't. I learned from some of the 'meanies' on here about TDEE-% and looked into that. So glad I did. I am 5'5", lift heavy 3x a week and lose on 2000 calories a day.

You have 13# to go. I would start (if you haven't) looking into strength training. Programs like Stronglifts 5x5, New Rules of Lifting for Women, Starting Strength. I bet body recomposition is going to help you with how you want to look. I have been doing Stronglifts for 9 weeks now and absolutely love it. I also don't pay much attention to the # on the scale as much as I did. I took measurements and progress photos. I will say in my 2 months of lifting, the scale # moves up and down 2-3#, but ALL of my measurements have gone down, my legs lost 2" in the first month. Hips/waist I've love 1.5" in both, Arms/neck I've lost 1". So I know I am heading in the right direction.

Giving up isn't an option.

Here are some links that might help.

Read these:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here?hl=so+you're+new+here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/974888-in-place-of-a-road-map-2k13

TL:DR the link right above this one then ->http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/975025-in-place-of-a-road-map-short-n-sweet

If you have 75+ lbs to lose 2 lbs/week is ideal
If you have 40-75 lbs to lose 1.5 lbs/week is ideal
If you have 25-40 lbs to lose 1 lbs/week is ideal
If you have 15 -25 lbs to lose 0.5 to 1.0 lbs/week is ideal
If you have less than 15 lbs to lose 0.5 lbs/week is ideal

Want to lift heavy things?
http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/

Stronglifts Summary
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/560459-stronglifts-5x5-summary

Stronglifts Womens Group
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/4601-stronglifts-5x5-for-women

Anniebotnen

Those last 10 pounds can be soon frustrating! What works for me is lowering my carb intake, and getting all carbs from vegetables, fruit and dairy. I set my macros at 35% protein, 35% fat and 30% carbs. Also, for some reason, setting my calories at my calculated TDEE less 250 calories (to lose 1/2 pound per week) seems to work better for me than the MFP method of setting calories lower and eating back some of my exercise calories.

Add strength training if you're not already doing that! It will tighten up your body as you lose, and make you feel good. Best of luck!

Calliope610

I started out on 1200+exercise calories and it worked for awhile, until it didn't. I learned from some of the 'meanies' on here about TDEE-% and looked into that.

I started eating 1200 calories a day, just like MFP told me to do. I felt so righteous eating Laughing Cow cheese on a dry English muffin for breakfast, a salad for lunch and small portions at dinner. I joined the local gym and was amazed when I was able to walk for 30 minutes straight on the treadmill. I was doing awesome! But I was also hungry, kinda miserable and definitely wanting the good food I was accustomed to. I no longer enjoyed eating, it gave me no pleasure or satisfaction. It became a chore to eat the bare minimum of calories. Yes, dieting sucked!!

I started reading in the forums and found “In Place of a Road Map”. That single post changed my life! I learned about TDEE, BMR and a sustainable lifestyle. My weight loss strategy suddenly changed from a temporary diet to a long term way of life – one of eat a little less, move a little more.

I have lost 50+ lbs with that strategy. I eat TDEE-500 calories, walk about 15-20miles/week and do strength training (honestly, I'm not consistent enough to see any real results yet, but I will get there). The best part is that losing weight is not a chore, a job. It is a new lifestyle I fully embrace and enjoy.

Just try the suggestions you have been given for 90 days. I think you will be very pleasantly surprised. If you don't like the results, you can always go back to 1200cals/day.

DebbieLyn63

Don't even try to diet at 1200. It's very hard and you'll be miserable. Read a couple of the sticky posts, and switch up to about 1500 a day, carefully counted (there are more scientific ways of working it out but it's a good start.) Start reading your own food log to workI out where you're squandering calories on stuff that isn't satisfying. Your pancake breakfasts look quite high calorie to me, but if you love them, maybe reduce how often you have them.

You have to log carefully if you're trying to lose on higher calories but it's much easier to stick to. You also need to be patient and keep going. I've lost about 10 lb in 3.5 months. Some weeks it feels very very slow but it's working, and all the time I'm learning what i would need to eat to stay at this lower weight. I wasn't eating massively, but I was eating lots of little snacks, second helpings and so that were adding up to a lot of extra food. Good luck - get in there, you can do it!

PS I am 4'11" and 52 years old. Calories are set to 1450 a day, but I average 1550. Losing= still possible when teeny and older.

It is great that with your stats, you are able to lose on 1550 a day. Please realize that your experience is not automatically like another one with your same stats. You are an outlier. I don't know what your activity level is, but I would imagine that you are quite active to be pulling this off.
Please do not assume that everyone on a 1200 diet is miserable, and it is impossible. Many people are doing quite well on 1200, and that level is appropriate for THEM.
I am 50, 5'6" and my TDEE is only 1500. So someone saying that I could be able to lose on more than that, is very frustrating to hear. I am unable to exercise much due to disabilities, so I must create my deficit with diet alone. Insulin resistance lowers my BMR, so I need to eat lower carb as well to be able to lose.

Yes, I WAS able to lose over 50 lbs since beginning here, but I did it by NOT listening to all the people telling me that 1200 was too low and I should be able to lose on 1600 or more. Fortunately, I found other ladies in my age range that were succeeding on a calorie goal that was appropriate for THEM, and that didn't judge me on my low level.

We all must find what works for our own situation.:flowerforyou:

Calliope610

OP, sent you a FR.

Auzziedoggie

I looked at your diary. I do see something wrong.

You have "homemade fajita tacos" and none of the ingredients listed. There is no way it is accurate unless you typed in the recipe yourself, cooked it the same way and then logged it. It's best to minimize estimation and to actually break out the scale and weight everything.

On the pancake day, you figured 1 tbsp of chocolate chips in three pancakes. OK, did you measure it? Maybe I'm crazy but what I've done is taken out a tbsp full and then weighed it on the food scale to make sure that: A) the spoon isn't heaping or especially densely packed and to make sure my plastic ikea measuring spoons are actually accurate. Now I know that yes, my spoons are accurate but my cup measurement isn't. I have to go slightly below the rim to get an accurate measurement. Sometimes I can go over the rim for particularly light and bulky ingredients like popcorn. Conclusion: Use a scale, and calibrate your spoons for convenience. The smaller your spoon, the more room for inaccuracy. In chemistry lab this ruins experiments. The same ethic applies to dieting, I find. But hey, maybe I'm just especially nuts.

You DO have to be meticulous. It sucks. I know. I've been there. But when you are convinced that logging WORKS you will find the energy to log. You seem really defeated right now, and it's totally fine. You just have to learn from these experiences.
Sometimes I get really lazy and just throw a bunch of ingredients on a plate. So what I do is I weigh the entire thing, then weigh the plate when I've finished eating (becasue I have more energy after eating -- don't we all), then subtract the weight of the plate from the food.

Sf0rza

It is great that with your stats, you are able to lose on 1550 a day. Please realize that your experience is not automatically like another one with your same stats. You are an outlier. I don't know what your activity level is, but I would imagine that you are quite active to be pulling this off.
Please do not assume that everyone on a 1200 diet is miserable, and it is impossible. Many people are doing quite well on 1200, and that level is appropriate for THEM.

Well, in terms of this post, I think the comparison's relevant. The OP (fairly similar height and weight target) exercises like mad, doesn't eat her exercise calories back, and finds it very hard to stick to 1200 a day. I don't know everything about her situation, but there's a good possibility that she's yo-yo-ing because she's constantly rebounding from trying lose weight and do exercise on a very tight calorie allowance.

I don't think I'm a particular outlier, actually. I've lost most of this weight doing no exercise whatsoever. But like you, the difference was in working out my personal TDEE figure. My TDEE is 1650, so I try to eat at TDEE-15%. Some of the time I wipe out that deficit because I'm still a bit optimistic about logging. *sigh*

I wanted to share my experience because before I came to MFP, I was absolutely convinced that I couldn't lose weight. Too old, too inactive, too hypoglycaemic, nursing a long-term foot injury etc. I honestly thought I was eating about 1500 calories a day then; I wasn't. It's a question of finding out your own stats, and working out something that you can stick to over the long term.

amgibson1980

Don't give up! We all struggle. 1200 calories is very hard, but it can be done. I know people on here have different views about cutting carbs, but more protein and fewer carbs will help you to feel satisfied longer. I Love, Love, LOVE carbs, but after I go on carb restriction for about a week I find it's super-easy to say no to food in general. That's why you lost so much weight on your chicken and broccoli diet. Maybe you could do that to jump start yourself. It might be easier to make food decisions without the initial food crave. I also liked the idea of looking at what you eat week by week and not day by day. One bad day does not equal a lost cause. You might want to do some weight training also. Most women do all cardio, but I don't know if that's the best approach. I've always been told the more muscle you have the more fat you burn and that's what you want, especially if you are eating so few calories. So, in a nutshell and just my opinion, look at the big picture, try carb restriction at least initially and then gradually add back, and try building some more muscle. A change will be good! I think you should always eat back your calories too! This will give you more food freedom and keep you motivated over the long haul. Good luck!:happy:

LisasLastTen

I will admit that my "home made" fajitas weren't home made.

I get that I should be meticulous with calories, but when you work with 98% foreigners and there's a pot luck you just guess the very best you can. I think I know what's in the home made kabuli palau - but I don't know for certain, and I'm not taking my Afghan friends aside and asking what all the ingredients listed are.

Feel free to judge that my records aren't "perfect" but unless I make everything at home myself (and I live alone so I rarely cook) I'm going to have to guess at some things.

LisasLastTen

Heck, I eat some things in my office that I can't even identify... but in many cultures it is extremely important that you share tea with your friends.

So being completely accurate by measuring everything isn't going to happen. I am amazed and almost awestruck that you can do that, but I choose to measure things I eat regularly every once in a while to make sure I'm not cheating (is that tablespoon of coffee creamer really a table spoon?). I often find I'm rounding up, not down. (It took me a while to realize that a serving of salad greens was half a bag, for example, far more than I was putting in my lunch whole wheat roll up.)

I appreciate what you're saying, Auzzidoggie, but measuring every item is another example, in my mind, of something that will make me miserable in the short and likely long term. Trust that I'm guessing the best I can. (I even wrote Einstein Brothers to find out EXACTLY how many calories were in their honey yogurt parfaits because they weren't listed here or on their web site.)

caseypcarlin

First off, it's time to stop thinking about "dieting." Anything you do should be sustainable over the long haul.

I was very much in your boat... Crash dieting and eating 1200-1400 a day and thinking I would never get to enjoy food again. Eventually I came to realize that my journey was a marathon, not a sprint. I could rock a 10,000 calorie deficit each week, lose 3 pounds, and feel terrible and miserable, or I could shoot for a 3500 deficit, have some treats, and feel better while losing 1 pound.

Don't weigh yourself after a treat or popcorn! You know that's just sodium and water weight.

Be vigilant and honest while tracking your food... Avoid the calorie creep. It's easy to leave out 15 calories here and 20 there, and not realize where you are.

It's so friggin tough. As a food addict, my primary purpose of eating food used to be the enjoyment. As such, it was impossible to moderate and control portions. Changing to a mindset of food being fuel took months. And I still struggle every day. Just commit to a larger timeframe. Look at calories on a weekly basis instead of daily. That will allow you some more flexibility. Decide which treats are really worth the calories. I love donuts... Love em. But the 5 seconds of enjoyment aren't worth the calories in my budget more than maybe once a month now. But I've learned to replace that enjoyment with other things... Whether it's healthy foods, activity, playing with my kids.

I empathize. But it can be done. I went from 4000-5000 calories a day not even realizing how much I was eating, to struggling to hit 2000 calories while eating almost as much as I want. Share your diary with others and see what they are eating.

I couldn't agree with this more!!!! If you can find healthy foods that you ENJOY rather than ones that seem like a chore to eat, it will be much easier!!! My mind was also set on "food for pleasure" and now that it sees food as fuel I struggle to make my 1500 calories. Also if you can change your focus from body image to health it may help as well. I'm sorry for your struggle but I congratulate your will power and desire for better!! You can do it