Not having a birthday?

fitsporation96

Hello

So basically I lost my Dad just before Christmas, worst day of my life, I haven't got over it one bit, we were so close, such a special bond. Anyway is it wrong to not want a birthday? his and mine were only a day apart and since mine and his is less than two weeks away I have become so depressed and don't want anything to do with it, basically our birthday was such a special big day for us, we often shared our birthdays, so like one big one, since I was a young child. I just can't cope with this anymore. I cry even thinking about it. What are your thoughts on this?

Proph24

sorry for your loss, do you plan to go the rest of your life without having a birthday? if not you got to start somewhere, maybe its not this year but it might be good to be around family and friends..or maybe in this case for the first year just the people closest to you in your life, immediate family etc. but i think you should try to do something and not feel guilty im sure your father would want you to have fun and not sit in a dark room depressed

unprettyzombie

i think you should throw a party celebrating his life and your birthday
i know it must be hard but i think he would of wanted you to enjoy your day

fitsporation96

Thank you for the kind words, I honestly never want to have a birthday again, I know he would want this but it isn't the same without him. Thank you to the both of you again.

Proph24

i lost my father when i was young and one of his favorite holidays if not his favorite was the 4th of july, its the last holiday we spent together also, and its one of my favorite holidays i dont know why or how but i just dont think about it too much really and its not a suck it up and deal with it attitude i have its just a thought that comes in my mind and i acknowledge the thought and let it sit for as long as it wants

geez i started writing this 10 minutes ago and suddenly stopped thanks for depressing me :laugh: :laugh:

then i just let it run its course and fade away i dont feel, and you shouldnt either that you need to think of him every minute of the day in order to "honor" him in some way, or feel guilty if you have a good time on your birthday

i dont know i feel for you and im not the best advice giver maybe its just one of those things where everyone grieves in their own way, just in the past 2 years or so my mother has been joining in on thanksgiving (my father died a few weeks before thanksgiving) so she would always work and had the same mindset i think you do, so i dont doubt that it might be a better way for you to cope but i challenge you to just try to do something on your birthday even if its something small, go out for ice cream it takes 30 minutes, see how you feel if your not feeling as bad as you thought dont feel guilty to go from having ice cream to the movies

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