Just needing some support.

Seabear1388

Over the last year or so, I've gained about 20 pounds due to stress eating, and I wasn't exactly a thin girl to begin with. I am currently at 210 pounds, the heaviest I have ever been, and I just feel really disappointed in myself.

My boyfriend of 3 years has recently told me that he no longer finds me attractive due to my weight gain. That comment, though true, was a really hard blow for me. Since then, I have been running regularly, and cutting back my portions. However, I just feel so gross and unattractive, that I feel guilty even when I eat the smallest of portions. My legs shake when I run now, and I find it difficult to find the energy to run as far as I used to.

I just don't know what to do. I don't know where to start. I don't know how to lose this weight. It just seems like an impossible, looming mountain above me.

Any advice would be welcome.

Also, here is an updated "Before" and now photo of myself.

http://i.imgur.com/daiCqWR.jpg

carebearrum

Hey Darlin,

I've gotta say I read your post and was a little dishearted. First off, the one thing I noticed is that you may not be eating enough for your body to function and it's going into shut down mode and making everything you eat into fat. Now, I would start with keeping a food journal and this site has an excellent one for that. It also has a excellent way to tell you how many calories you need to eat to keep your body going and how many you need to eat to lose the weight. I use that everyday and track my calories and I've lost an inch already around my waist and hips So it works. They also have a Fitness tracker too So you know what you are burning in calories too. I'd suggest doing those and don't forget to check with your Doctor too as you don't want to do anything that will jeopardize your health

Stop thinking of it as a mountain as there is the problem too, you thinking it will never be done and yet it is something that any of us trying to lose the weight and get healthier can do. Everything is possible if you put your mind and will power to. Remember this is no Cannot or don't. there is only do and can. You can do this, You will do this.

If you want to add me please add me and I'll help as much as i can, as I'm going through the same thing. I finally realized though that I can do this and my fears can be a great motivator.

Care.

True_Blue82

You just need a plan and the commitment to stick with it regardless of results for a certain amount of time, say 3 months. Promise yourself that you will track everything and start from there. Don't go crazy with too low of a diet or it won't work.

I lost 30 pounds using WW online and have kept it off for 2 years. I dropped 10 dress sizes (12 to a 2), but it took me 5 months to do it. I had to change the way I ate, the way I dealt with stress, and the way I thought about food. Now everything is a choice. Do I have a glass of wine, or a bagel thin with a little whipped cream cheese & some deli turkey? (tonight it was the wine :happy: ). I love eggs, but two eggs is 4 points, while 1/2 cup of egg whites plus low fat cheese plus a piece of low fat rye toast is the same, so which would I rather have? I still ate treats on occasion (and still do) but I choose them carefully and I always keep track. I thought I'd get sick of it but I like tracking, it makes me feel in control of my choices.

Don't do this for your boyfriend - do it for you. The highlight for me wasn't getting new clothes (and getting rid of my bigger clothes - I'm stuck with it now!) but when I took an entire link out of my watch. Tracking the inches was even better than tracking the scale.

Hang in there!

OkamiLavande

Hey sweetie! Don't look down on yourself, when you look down on yourself, especially physically, you are so much more likely to do damage to yourself to try and fix what you don't like. One thing being eating too little for the activity you are doing. Running takes a lot of energy to do, especially if you are trying to do distance running. Calculate your BMR and see what you should be eating as a BARE MINIMUM to function. That way you know what number you shouldn't drop below calorie wise. Secondly, decide what eating habits are best for you. If eating six small meals a day works for you, do that. If eating between certain hours of the day works for you best, do that. If eating three large meals, do that. If you like snacking, make it work for your calorie allotment.

Something you should really invest in is a food scale! This has become my best friend. It lets me know just how much I eat every day and allows me to know what proper portions look like. Chips will become a wonderful treat with a food scale. You can just about fill a cereal bowl full of chips for just ONE serving! You don't need to deprive yourself, just know what portions are.

Eat more, please. If your legs are shaking when you run your body is running through it's glycogen stores really quickly and that's not good. It means you aren't properly fueling your body for the work you want it to do.

If you want to be friends add me! I'll be a good supporter and be there when you feel down. It's nice to have friends on here because it makes the journey just that much easier.

You don't have to starve and deprive yourself to be able to lose weight. I started my journey a few years ago at 176 and now I weigh 122 pounds. It just takes dedication and knowing what works for your body.

Brownsbacker4evr

Sorry to hear you are hearing **** like that from someone who should be helping you out and supporting you. You should know that eating next to no food is just as bad as eating too much. Neither do the body good.. MFP is a great place to network and build a great supporting group of people to help you along the way. Would be more than glad to help you out and offer support. Feel free to reach out if you do want the help. Wish you the best.

HellyFaye

Hearing something like that from your boyfriend is hurtful. I dated a guy who body shamed me like that until we broke up. I ended up gaining more weight after we broke up. Turns out I'm a hell of a lot happier now. I did something very similar to you when all of that went down. Stay strong. Love yourself. I know that can be really hard.

Please eat more. Find out your BMR (Basic metabolic rate) to see how many calories you need to be eating. Plan your meals. Log everything you eat into a food diary. There will be days you go over. Courage and strength is the power to not let those days knock you down. Get back on that horse and try again tomorrow.

Get yourself into a workout routine that you love. Stick with it. Be consistant.

Find ways to do some self care. Journal, take a bath, watch a good movie or TV show, go for a walk ect. Find ways other than food to sooth those sad and bad moods. I start off my morning with journaling, I'm still new to it.

Build a support system for getting healthy. Feel free to add me. Get involved with some good friends to help support you in this journey. You are not alone.