No More Comparisons- The Battle Within

Jill_newimprovedversion

I've come to realize something...and I have a feeling I'm not alone in this.

I grew up as a scrawny little girl with a stick figure made fun of because of my weight.
I ate a lot of sweets and junk food and started gaining weight- which also resulted in rude, hurtful comments.

BUT, I also compared myself to others heavier than I was and felt I was better off than them..
I looked at others who practiced self-control and hated them.
In both cases, I had my own arrogance. I tore them down in my mind to make myself feel better about myself.

This journey has been an interesting one on SO many levels.

All along the way, I find people who have cheered me on- and others who have been the stumbling blocks.

I realize that I'm reaping a LOT of what I myself sowed- the nasty digs, the looks, the jealousy...
and there's a lot of soul-searching I've done

things in me that I loathe even more than what I see in the mirror.

Those are the things I endeavor to change more than my body image.

The only person I want to compare myself to is the one I want to become tomorrow.

kathleensaxer

Its a journey we all take and don't think you are the only one...you are just the most honest about the journey! Keep on keepin on...I try to keep the journey in my sight and compare myself to no one except the person I want to be!

PapaverSomniferum

I've never compared myself to others, and considering my poor self image, I'm thankful for that!

However, I have friends whose only self-image is how they measure themselves up to others. It's got to be a difficult mindset for many reasons. If you're heavier--it's got to be frustrating to see someone smaller than yourself because it might make you feel inferior. If you're heavier--it's got to be derailing to compare yourself to someone larger, believe yourself "okay" or "at least not that bad" and therefore not motivated to make the healthy changes that might be correct for yourself.

There is a LOT of self awareness and self discovery that comes along with any fitness/weight loss/self care "journey". You can't change your lifestyle without looking at who you are and why you are where you are. Where you've been and why you're going where you hope to be going.

You're in the right place, though! We're all learning a lot about ourselves (and each other) here.

BrownEyedSister

Jill,

That was a beautiful post. I think so many of us are raised to compare ourselves to others. It's lovely that you're working on improving yourself inside and out. I'm going to join you on this adventure.

BrownEyedSister