I GAVE UP ON MYSELF, BUT TODAY IT WILL CHANGE!!!!

Ellenl2010

Hi my name is Ellen currently 22 years old. I'm ready to share my story. I think the hardest part was I always felt like I was going through this alone. I'm ready to change and I just need help getting motivated again. Growing up I was always on the heavy side. I knew I was big, but no one every really criticized me besides my family. Just a little background I am ASIAN!!! Which makes matter worse because they have these expectations that we are suppose to be stick thin. I'm sorry, I will probably never fulfill that wish, but I know what healthy is and I am currently not living it.

When I was in the 3rd grade I got really sick and had to go for a check up. They told me my weight and I was 132 lbs at that point. They gave me a short lecture about being fat and how it's unhealthy; but that's about it nothing about how to change my life. But, then again they probably thought I was in my baby fat phase. I didn't go to the doctor after that. I think the next visit in my life was when I was in 8th grade and at that point they told me i weighed 200 lbs. I don't remember much of what they told me; but all I remember was this time they said for me to watch my weight.

When I went to college I was probably around 285 lbs. I actually didn't get the freshman 15 syndrome; but I was also a poor college student so that might have prevented it. My older cousin got married in my sophomore year of college and I was a bridesmaid, so all I remember was I had to look good in a dress. I remember at this point weight about 287lbs I worked out 2 and half month straight and lost about 15 lbs I was super excited. I was at 272 lbs and I haven't been that weight since 10th grade. I thought I had the world in my hand that this was going to be it. I broke the habit; but college is definitely not the place for anyone to lose weight. Studying, on top of work can really drive anyone to comfort food.

It was summer of my junior year and I just lazy around and promise myself I will work out later that year. It never really happen cause I was just super busy with everything. Soon it was the summer of Senior year and I was pumped to work out, to look good for graduation, within the first two weeks of summer I fell an sprain my ankle to the point I couldn't walk for a few months. My foot has never been the same. So I made it a goal to workout my last semester of college I did it for about a month until I realized my shins were having sharped pain I realized I might have runners knee. Everytime I ran it would hurt so bad and it limited me to only walking. I somehow steadily just gave up. I left my senior being at about 289 lbs.

When I came back home I wasn't able to find a job and decided to go back to college for a second degree which I will be finishing by the end of this year. I was back home with my parents and they are strict about me cooking for myself and I had to eat whatever they cooked mostly consisted of soup. With the freedom I ate out everyday and made fast foods my meals.BAD BAD MISTAKE!!!! The sad part is that I knew what I was doing to my body but couldn't stop like my brain was telling Ellen get control of yourself, but my body just craved every bad thing. I couldn't STOP!!!!!! I attempted to change my habit by working out, but it would last for about 2 days and I would call it quits. With A full-time job and school I just don't have time to do anything. I've gained 12 lbs in a matter of 6 MONTHS. I TOLD MYSELF I WOULD NEVER GET THIS BIG!!!! and now I am 301 lbs. I fear for my life and health. I don't know how to stop. But, I know i want to change. I am 22 years old I want to LIVE!!!! I don't know want to be restricted on the things I do because of my weight!!!!! So today July 9, 2014 I DECIDED TO TAKE BACK MY LIFE !!!!! Please give me words of hope and guidance I will work hard and I know the road will be long and tough; but if I never try I'll be stuck and that's even worse!!!! Thank you for reading my story!!!!

Darya_91

Wow! What a story! Im 22 as well. Its hard feeling larger than other girls when its supposed to be your cute hot years. I think you are totally bad *kitten* for stepping up to the plate! It's not easy but worth it. You totally got this.

aoea2013

July 9, 2014 I DECIDED TO TAKE BACK MY LIFE !!!!!

You absolutely can & will! You can do this!

kochevy

That's all it takes, you can do it one step at a time, I too have started my. Journey today best of luck gurl

dogluvr_2014

Hi Ellen, First let me say what an amazing young woman you are. I am so proud of you for not only putting your story out there for others to read but for taking the first step to changing your life. You are just at the beginning of your journey but I have no doubt that you can do this. Just make up your mind that you will not give up. Log onto this site every day and find the encouragement and inspiration that you need. There are so many people here that are going through the same thing and we can all help each other to succeed. I have only been on here a little over a month now and I know I have a long way to go but my commitment only gets stronger each day. I have met some amazing people here and I know you will too. You do not have to do this alone. Stay strong my friend and be kind to yourself. You are so worth the fight. Take care & God Bless!!! :flowerforyou:

benaddict

If and when you are truly ready, you will change and no excuses will stop you. I truly hope today is that day, for your sake. You CAN do this, focus on small changes, don't do too much too fast or you may get overwhelmed and give up. Best of luck to you!

codyboomboom

Hi Ellen, You can do this! You are young and beautiful. You can do this. I am a teacher by profession and have seen many beautiful young girls give up on themselves based on what someone else thinks or says. FORGET THEM AND FORGET WHAT OTHER PEOPLE LOOK LIKE AROUND YOU! Its what you think that matters. I am 65 years old and have 100lbs to lose, if I can do it so can you, Just set realistic goals. Don't deny yourself anything. Make wiser choices and pay attention to portions, Make tiny changes, don't try to loose it all at one time. One change I have made is parking along ways away when going to the store and power walking to the door. Plan everyday. One tip I found on this program is everything should fit in a bowl or cup. I love to snack so this helped. You can do this! My Motto is " Just keep chipping away a little at a time". Find you a Motto to remind yourself and to keep yourself focus. You can do this! I watched my young friend lose a 100lbs on this program, if she can do it, I can too. If I can do it YOU CAN TOO! GOOD LUCK AND DON'T GIVE UP NO MATTER WHAT! JUST KEEP CHIPPING IT AWAY!

HellyFaye

I wish you the best of luck.

tequila09

The best advice I can give you is to just do it. We know we need to work out and eat a healthy balanced diet but sometimes other wants get in the way. Take it day by day and don't give up on yourself! You may mess up here and there but don't let that lead you down the eff it road. I'm sure most of us have been there. It will take time and it won't be easy but it will be worth it. You deserve to be healthy and happy!!