Is this okay?

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Replies

  • lunglady
    lunglady Posts: 526 Member
    Thats not how this works, that not how any of this works ...........

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
    I LOVE that commercial!
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
    Advice is only helpful if it is asked for.
    Advice says one thing..."BE more like me"

    and that IS my philosophy when the dispensation of "A-D-V-I-C-E" is the subject of conversation.
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    Ignore, and keep doing what you were doing. If he says something next time, don't even bother glancing his way, and tell him to keep it down this time.
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,358 Member
    I would just say thanks and move on.
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
    Thanks everyone. I think it would have been different if maybe I had bad form and he were trying to prevent injury and not just telling me I should do a different lift to hit a different muscle, I didn't have my ear-buds in, if I had ever seen him before anywhere, or if I had asked for his advice. I didn't take his advice, but I might do some research and possibly give it a try eventually if I feel it's necessary. I'm not a pro in the gym by any means and had just never experienced this before and wanted to see what others thought.
  • TX_Thundercat
    TX_Thundercat Posts: 2,437 Member
    Sounds kinda like a d-bag and he was trying to hit on you. Seems pretty harmless and I wouild not be offended. Unless, of course, he was looking at you like this...

    5cdmkk.gif
  • DWBalboa
    DWBalboa Posts: 37,259 Member
    What he spoke directly to you? How dare him, off with his head!!! Both of them!!
    I guess he could be a DB, was he all like “Night at the Roxbury” DB looking? If so run! But seriously, regardless of his motivation I wouldn’t let it bother you. Perhaps even give his advice a try, DB’s can be right too.
    I personally, would not give someone unsolicited advice unless I saw them doing something that could prove detrimental to their health or mine but that’s just me.
    Although I must admit, if a guy came up to me and said something about getting that sexy, straight V in the back I might be a little alarmed too.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    If that was the VERY first interaction- I would have gladly said- oh you like the way this all looks? (points to self)

    (usually it gets a smile or a nod)

    And then I say- well thanks- I got here without you- what makes you think I need your input? but thanks anyway- enjoy your workout."

    Walking up to a complete stranger without introducing yourself or ASKING if they would like some advice- esp if you aren't doing something extremely potentially damaging- is wrong- and insulting. I wouldn't be offended- just wildly annoyed.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Guys are fixers, even if you don't appreciate it. They will comment to just about anyone.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    unsolicited advice from creepy grunty man ...

    eww
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    unsolicited advice from creepy grunty man ...

    eww

    What about unsolicited advice from just a creepy man? Or just a grunty man? :bigsmile:
  • dcaiani
    dcaiani Posts: 2,819 Member
    Based only on what you have written I guess I really don’t see the problem with giving someone pointers. If he didn’t continue on with any unwanted conversation or additional things that you should be doing, didn’t touch you, didn’t make any derogatory remarks …. Sounds like he was just trying to help you out with your technique. It happens all the time between members of the opposite sex as well as members of the same sex. It’s doesn’t always mean that you are hitting on someone. And even if he was hitting on you as long as it didn’t continue and make you uncomfortable whats the big deal?
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    There was a new guy at the gym this morning. Usually my time at the gym is peaceful enough. I am usually the only female, but that's not a problem for me. I am in my zone, do my thing get in, get out and get on with my life. The new guy this morning was grunting and moaning loud enough that I could here him from 40 feet away with my ear buds in. That's fine. Some people are more vocal than others and so I just block it out. Everything was fine until new guy struts over to me while I am doing incline chest presses, gets my attention and says, "On your next set you should turn your elbows in a little more to change the lift and work on your lats. That would give you that sexy, straight V in the back." I didn't even know what to say and it kind of irritated me. Was this guy out of line or am I being too sensitive?

    one of the many reasons I can't see myself EVER going to a gym LOL
  • jessupbrady
    jessupbrady Posts: 508 Member
    Not such a big deal. He was just trying to help you with form and explain what muscles will get worked. OK, he didn't have to call the "V" sexy. But, he didn't push it or comment on whether or not you were sexy. A bit rude since he had to get your attention.

    Take what advice he gives you and research it - as a gym staff member, whatever. If it is sound and helpful, then let it go and be glad you learned something.

    If he is giving advice that isn't something that would work for you (and tries to do so routinely), I'd simply tell him you personally don't like getting advice without asking for it from other members.
  • sugarstrawberries
    sugarstrawberries Posts: 140 Member
    You didn't ask him for advice, he didn't introduce himself, he is a stranger, yet he gave you "tips" on looking "sexy" (to his eye)... I don't think these things are okay.