Patience is NOT my strong suit

Jened13

I appreciate all the feedback! There are some WONDERFUL ideas on how to set small milestones. My official weigh in for the month and measurements is 8/13. I think that if I hit the 10 lb marker I will take myself out for a little pampering. Non food rewards and celebration for the small milestones that will eventually be the ULTIMATE GOAL. Thanks everyone!!!

kerwristea89

I am glad this post is here. It is nice to have a reminder that we should use NSV almost more than actually looking at the scale. When I was going to the gym every single day, I would pick 1 day a week and weigh in. I found that I either had a much better day, or a very crappy day. My favorite NSV is how my jeans fit me!

I totally understand the whole thing about "I did such a great job, I can treat myself to ____" because that is what gets me every single time. I am trying to work on just portion control right now and kicking the things that I know I do not need because I can't stop at just one...like sweets and candy. Good luck with everything and I also wanted to say thanks to everyone who responded because it really is a nice reminder to the different NSV that we can use and keep in mind

Kalikel

I've never been a fan of the "Fake it till you make it" saying. I've no desire to fake anything. Being real works much better for me. But if it works for you, that's great.

You have so much weight to lose. It's going to take a long time. You will have to be very committed and determined to do it. Patience isn't a bonus here - it's a requirement. If you can't be patient, you cannot succeed.

Only you can decide if the long, hard struggle is one you wish to take on. Only you can decide if you want to conquer your fat/appetite or let it conquer you.

Fat or no? A couple years of hard work, every day or stay fat?

Make your decision and then go forward being what you've chosen to be.

That's my advice, for whatever it's worth.

shabaity

I've never been a fan of the "Fake it till you make it" saying. I've no desire to fake anything. Being real works much better for me. But if it works for you, that's great.

You have so much weight to lose. It's going to take a long time. You will have to be very committed and determined to do it. Patience isn't a bonus here - it's a requirement. If you can't be patient, you cannot succeed.

Only you can decide if the long, hard struggle is one you wish to take on. Only you can decide if you want to conquer your fat/appetite or let it conquer you.

Fat or no? A couple years of hard work, every day or stay fat?

Make your decision and then go forward being what you've chosen to be.

That's my advice, for whatever it's worth.

"Fake it till you make it" should be the waitresses slogan lol we use it so often (Way off topic but true)

redwoodkestrel

17 months may seem like a long time. Long enough to make you feel discouraged and wish you could just lose it all faster. It might even feel like too long, and might make you feel like you just want to quit now.

But think about how you'll feel, 17 months from now, if you ended up quitting now because you're not losing fast enough. 17 months from now you could be 100+ lbs lighter. Or you could weigh the same as you do now, and wishing you had just stuck with it.

I often feel discouraged knowing what a long journey I have ahead of me to reach my goal. But I know I'm going to feel way worse if I quit! And when I do reach that goal, I'll be so happy I stuck with it. :drinker:

crystalblair2355

Try thinking short term. Think in 5 pound increments. If you're 300 now, look forward to 295 and soon when you're there: look ahead to 290 and so on.

As to people's comments: they probably DO see something in you. Living a healthier lifestyle has more benefits than just weight loss. Your skin/hair may look healthier, you may have more confidence & energy, etc.

As to not believing it - its hard to kick that one. Even when you've made major progress and mostly come to terms with it, you'll have moments of self-doubt. So perhaps keep something on hand to remind yourself. Like maybe as you get into smaller clothes, keep one pair of jeans on hand so you can SEE the difference anytime you need a solid piece of proof.

^^^^^THIS!!!! TOTALLY AGREE!!! try to set 5lb sucesses as i call them rather than goals

monie5903

So as someone who started at 330 pounds with a goal to lose 155 lbs, I honestly know how you feel. When I started my journey, it felt like I was losing weight in slow motion. But once I was able to correct my eating, I was more consistent with my 2lbs a week weight loss.

1) Remember that it took YEARS to gain this weight. If you have to put in the effort of 2-3 years to get it off/reach your goal, what is that compared to having the rest of your life feeling happy and healthy about yourself?

2) I had to set baby goals. Like right now I'm down to 247, so my baby goal is to make it to 240 by the end of this monrh. My advice is to be sure you're drinking LOTS of water. We did my weigh in on Friday and I was 250. However, once I got back to drinking my water over the weekend I was 247. Water weight is so real! Do not get overwhelmed by your end goal. I was doing that and it kept me from getting on track.

3) I treat myself to a cheat meal every 2 weeks. Not a cheat weekend, but a cheat meal. It gives me something to look forward to.

4) Don't beat yourself up if you don't reach the weight you think you should be at. I take measurements every 2-3 months and it helps to put into perspective that muscle weighs more than fat and that the scale may not be where I want it to be, but I am shrinking all over.

5) I have a fear of loose skin too. But by losing the weight at a rate of about 8-10 pounds a month, I know that I am giving my body time to bounce back. I'd rather go slow and steady than go fast and end up with the loose skin. If I still end up with it, I'll cross that bridge when I get there.

6) Speak positive affirmations over yourself! I never in a million years would have thought this journey would change my inner Monica, but it truly has. I have learned to truly love myself at each size on this journey. By loving myself I am able to keep striving for my fitness and weight loss goals!

Stay positive and continue to love yourself! Speak kinds words and facts about yourself. My aunts favorite, "I am beautiful. I am worthy. I am loved." You may have to put them on sticky notes around the house and car to keep you encouraged and that's OK. We're not just changing our bodies in so many ways, but we're changing our minds to (self-control, delayed gratification, loving ourselves in the moment, etc.). Changing both takes time but by practicing patience, you will become more patient :-)

jms1739

Keep up the good work, I have a friend on here that has lost 192lbs. It has taken her 4 years to get there, but she is an inspiration to me. She works out just about everyday, rain or shine, in the cold. When I feel like complaining about why I don't want to work out I think about her and realize what am I whining about. I remember her before she started and I see her dedication and what she has accomplished. I am very proud of her, and that has helped me to try and not set super high expectations for myself.

I don't personally have nearly that much weight to get to my goal, but I have enough, and I have learned this about myself, thru my many journeys of dieting. You can't think about how far you have to go, or how long its going to take. Just get off your butt and do it. Me personally if I try and focus on , I have 53 more lbs. to get to my goal and I really want to be there by x date, that I set myself up for failure every single time. This has become a life change, I will be doing this whole healthy thing for the rest of my life.

I also can't keep thinking about, well I should have done things differently 20+ years ago and maybe I wouldn't have the issues I have now. And just because I am 46, doesn't mean that I have to be a dumpy mommy, and I definitely don't strive to be a super skinny middle aged woman either. I want to be healthy and feel good. I want to go to a store and not have to search the +sizes and shop my grandma's closet because the clothes for plus women aren't exactly the most fashionable. (everyone has to agree with that, I don't like with it, because we all want to look nice and feel good about ourselves, or pay crazy prices either)

I don't want to turn 50 and set myself up for health issues. I want to be the best me I can be.

DawnieB1977

Firstly, remind yourself that you may have had big losses in the past, but you gained it back, so in the long term it doesn't pay off. If you lose slowly, it is more likely to stay off.

Set yourself mini goals. I'm losing weight after my third baby, and I'm going to get my hair cut and highlighted when I can wear an old pair of jeans without a muffin top! After that I won't be that far from goal, but I've got a dress that I'd like to fit into, and when I can do that, I'll think of another non-food reward, maybe something new to wear, and then when I get to goal, I'll treat myself to a day out at a big shopping centre with my friends. I only have about 28lbs to lose, and I'm not giving myself a deadline, but I fully expect it to take until at least February.

Do you have a friend who's losing weight/getting fitter? I think it helps to have someone to help keep you motivated.

Good luck

WalkingAlong

I've never been a fan of the "Fake it till you make it" saying. I've no desire to fake anything. Being real works much better for me. But if it works for you, that's great.

I think 'fake it til you make it' is a powerful strategy for so many things. If you want to be fit, that's a great way to achieve it-- by eating and exercising NOW like someone fit does, regardless of your current fitness/weight level.

numinousnymph

i, too, struggle with impatience, especially when you have a lot to lose. the key for me is not focusing on "i lost 2lbs this week, that's great, but i've got 30 (or 40, 50, 60, 100...) lbs left! i feel like i'm NEVER going to get there -- it's going to take FOREVER! or what if i never even make it there?!". i struggled with that for a LONG time (when i started i had ~50 lbs to lose), but about halfway through losing weight, i looked at the bigger picture. our bodies have to lose weight at a certain pace, both because it's healtheir for our bodies to do that AND because taking it slower means you will have an easier time losing weight and not feel miserable (i.e. not crazily restricting your diet and/or exercising hard for hours on end each day). i have 10 lbs left to go, and i still feel impatient (especially since i'm only set on losing about 0.3 - 0.5 lbs a week), but i look at the alternative -- if i wanted to lose even 1lb per week, i'd have to net 1100 calories per day. that is WAY too restrictive for me, and i would probably overeat once i got to my goal because i'd felt so deprived. i want this to be a permanent change in my diet and exercise, and for me, that means going slowly. when i get frustrated, i always remind myself that i WILL get to where i want to be eventually. i think about where i was a year ago from now and how i never thought i'd ever get to the weight i am now and lamented about how long it'd take me to get there -- but here i am!

you need to take it one day (or week) at a time. you will have plateaus (hopefully not actual fat gains, but they happen -- and it's okay if they do.) and discouraging moments, but focus on the larger goal. don't think about "oh my god i still have X amount of lbs to lose, that's so much". before you know it, you will get there.