Complacent.. it's worse than food.

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Uptopargolf
Uptopargolf Posts: 263
in Health and Weight Loss
Just want to throw this one out there.. How many of us have every at one point become complacent with ourselves? Or the situation you were in? Or you're weight?

It seems to happen most when we fall into relationships with others. We feel so accepted, so comfortable, that we let ourselves go. I realized it about 3 years ago, ever since I swore I would never get that way again. (it has happened once since than) I am just wondering how everyone else deals with it?

I hate it, I hate the thought of it. Even tho, I am in a relationship, I just need to constantly tell myself not to let myself go. That being healthy is very important, and even if that may mean giving up some time with the girlfriend to workout, or skipping desert, etc. That is what needs to be done.

I have always tried to live by.. "if you're not moving forward, you're moving backward". Just some thoughts I wanted to share, and see what everyone else has to say about it.

Replies

  • HealthyChanges2010
    HealthyChanges2010 Posts: 5,831 Member
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    I agree I think taking care of ourselves is vital to not only our journey but any relationships we have with friends, family etc. To give of ourselves fully we have to first have it together ourselves to have anything to give back to another.

    Sounds like you have your head on straight to me and you're catching yourself which is great progress!:drinker:
  • Uptopargolf
    Uptopargolf Posts: 263
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    I agree I think taking care of ourselves is vital to not only our journey but any relationships we have with friends, family etc. To give of ourselves fully we have to first have it together ourselves to have anything to give back to another.

    Sounds like you have your head on straight to me and you're catching yourself which is great progress!:drinker:

    Thank you. I completely agree. Not only has working out, made me feel better about myself. But I truly believe it has helped my career also. I am confident. I know what I want, and I am out to get it. I'm not sure I would be so motivated in myself if I never completed P90X, and started being healthier.
  • prettier_me
    prettier_me Posts: 53 Member
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    so true. i feel like when i'm comfortable with who i am, and am feeling loved by the people around me, i tend to not focus so much on keeping up with my body. we all need to remember that we only have one body, and we should take care of it :) i think relationships with others are most important, but if we're not healthy then we can't give 100% to the people we love.
  • Uptopargolf
    Uptopargolf Posts: 263
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    so true. i feel like when i'm comfortable with who i am, and am feeling loved by the people around me, i tend to not focus so much on keeping up with my body. we all need to remember that we only have one body, and we should take care of it :) i think relationships with others are most important, but if we're not healthy then we can't give 100% to the people we love.

    Agreed. Plus to be honest, relationships come and go. As unfortunate as it may be. However I think it would be harder to get dumped and be completely out of shape and unhealthy. Actually I know it would be harder. But I have seen it with so many of my friends who get into long-term-ish relationships and let themselves go, like they just don't care. Going out to eat, stop exercising, etc.

    Terrible.
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
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    It's hard to find a balance of relationships and being healthy, especially when someone that we have in our lives is not supportive. That is a part of our fitness journey, though. Good for you, knowing what is happening around you and in your own mind!
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    OMG! You're the first person that I've ever heard admit this, apart from me. I always put on weight when I meet someone new. Always. You do get into a comfort zone, most of it based either in the kitchen (restaurants, cinema) or the bedroom!! If only the bedroom would negate the kitchen in terms of calories!! :laugh: :wink:

    And then there is the break up when I eat even more!!! :grumble:

    And then there is the building of self confidence in order to meet someone new and the whole process starts again!! :noway:

    I think food is a comfort in all respects and its an enjoyable pastime in a loving relationship - sharing an ice cream, popcorn, a romantic meal etc. And we really arn't watching calories in that environment, cos, lets face it, watching calories is boring and, in the first stages of most relationships, you are trying to impress! Enjoy! Have fun together............

    I dont know what the answer is apart from hook up with someone else on a diet/fitness regime. Now that's gotta be a good compatibility question on a dating site.........:laugh:

    Hey, perhaps you just need to get your g/f to join the gym??

    I empathise completely :flowerforyou:
  • jen0619
    jen0619 Posts: 414
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    I have felt that way and saw that it did happen to me but when I became unhappy with myself it wore on the relationship. It was time for a change and ever since then I have been happy and our relationship has only grown to be better.
  • Uptopargolf
    Uptopargolf Posts: 263
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    OMG! You're the first person that I've ever heard admit this, apart from me. I always put on weight when I meet someone new. Always. You do get into a comfort zone, most of it based either in the kitchen (restaurants, cinema) or the bedroom!! If only the bedroom would negate the kitchen in terms of calories!! :laugh: :wink:

    And then there is the break up when I eat even more!!! :grumble:

    And then there is the building of self confidence in order to meet someone new and the whole process starts again!! :noway:

    I think food is a comfort in all respects and its an enjoyable pastime in a loving relationship - sharing an ice cream, popcorn, a romantic meal etc. And we really arn't watching calories in that environment, cos, lets face it, watching calories is boring and, in the first stages of most relationships, you are trying to impress! Enjoy! Have fun together............

    I dont know what the answer is apart from hook up with someone else on a diet/fitness regime. Now that's gotta be a good compatibility question on a dating site.........:laugh:

    Hey, perhaps you just need to get your g/f to join the gym??

    I empathise completely :flowerforyou:

    Haha, very great post!

    I am not telling the girlfriend to join the gym any longer! Or even suggesting exercise, or eating healthy to her. If she wants to do it, she will do it. My girlfriend in no way is fat, or over-weight. But she has put on a few pounds since we have been together. She knows she has and says she wants to do something about it. But she just never does..

    She is supportive of my diet, very much actually. But I have giving up on hers. It is nearly impossible to get a thought to you girls without me sounded like an *kitten*, and starting an argument. Lets be honest, no one wants to hear from their loved one.. "you need to lose some weight".

    It always comes down to how badly do you want it?
  • hooah_mj
    hooah_mj Posts: 1,004 Member
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    one note: For a "mom" things are a bit different.....we have children and the body responds accordingly.

    I have kept very active my entire life, but I can see what you're describing all around me.

    Most young folk live a very different life than I did.......too much technology?? too many conveniences??
    All I know is that obesity is a reality for the Millennium American Generation....

    I bet you can guess what I bought for MY kids.....and it's not exercise equipment!
  • Uptopargolf
    Uptopargolf Posts: 263
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    one note: For a "mom" things are a bit different.....we have children and the body responds accordingly.

    I have kept very active my entire life, but I can see what you're describing all around me.

    Most young folk live a very different life than I did.......too much technology?? too many conveniences??
    All I know is that obesity is a reality for the Millennium American Generation....

    I bet you can guess what I bought for MY kids.....and it's not exercise equipment!

    The younger generation yes, they are going to have a big problem. My generation, generation x-er's I believe? (People in their twenties) are defiantly more conscious of our weight.

    Its not that its to much technology. It is the fact that, junk food is just easy to give to kids. And it is easier for companies to market towards them. Pretty simple.
  • hooah_mj
    hooah_mj Posts: 1,004 Member
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    Being at the tail-end of the Baby Boomers, I thought WE would break the system with all our needs....now I'm wondering if you X-ers, as you put it, will be able to rely on the M generation to pay sufficiently enough to take care of your golden years...they'll have more needs than you will, I'm afraid.

    Hope you have taken care to be able to take care of yourself :ohwell:
    All my best, really.
  • saadler
    saadler Posts: 116
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    My boyfriend and I both gained a bit after we met and started dating. After I went up a size, I decided I needed to do something about it. Freshman 15 doesn't really count if it's in my sophomore year! At first my boyfriend kept telling me I was gorgeous how I was, that I didn't need to do anything, but now that he sees I'm serious about this and have been able to do this for a few days without giving up he's much more supportive and says he's proud of me and that I'm even influencing him to eat a little better even though we're far away.

    So yes, complacency is a problem but I don't think it's the worst problem in the world because it means you're extremely happy and comfortable. Still, health is important so you can live as long as possible with the one that makes you so darn happy.
  • Uptopargolf
    Uptopargolf Posts: 263
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    Being at the tail-end of the Baby Boomers, I thought WE would break the system with all our needs....now I'm wondering if you X-ers, as you put it, will be able to rely on the M generation to pay sufficiently enough to take care of your golden years...they'll have more needs than you will, I'm afraid.

    Hope you have taken care to be able to take care of yourself :ohwell:
    All my best, really.

    I do not even want to think about it at the moment!
  • HealthyChanges2010
    HealthyChanges2010 Posts: 5,831 Member
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    one note: For a "mom" things are a bit different.....we have children and the body responds accordingly.

    I have kept very active my entire life, but I can see what you're describing all around me.

    Most young folk live a very different life than I did.......too much technology?? too many conveniences??
    All I know is that obesity is a reality for the Millennium American Generation....

    I bet you can guess what I bought for MY kids.....and it's not exercise equipment!
    a shake weight MJ?! bahahahahha :laugh: :tongue: :glasses:

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