Feeling left out...

Options
Ok, I might be a little over sensitive but here it goes anyway.

Some of the women that I work with are discouraging me in my weightloss. Since I don't have large numbers to lose and I am mostly trying to just get healthy and get back in shape. My goals are to lose the fat that I am carrying. When I mention that I am watching what I eat and working out everyday I get comments back like "Oh whatever" and "and you need to why?". When I tell them that I may look small, but I still have quite a bit of fat to lose and that I am no where near where I want to be, they roll their eyes at me.

It wouldn't be so bad but everyone else is talking about how they want to do something about weight loss and some talk about what they are doing, but none of them seem to want to include me because we are all at such different places.

After walking around for 2 years being uncomfortable with the way my body looks to me, I have learned to hide my problem areas so that hopefully no one else notices them, but apparently I need to wear stuff that does not fit me now so that others can see what I see.

Just had to get this off my chest, it has been bothering me all week.

Replies

  • Uptopargolf
    Options
    Ok, I might be a little over sensitive but here it goes anyway.

    Some of the women that I work with are discouraging me in my weightloss. Since I don't have large numbers to lose and I am mostly trying to just get healthy and get back in shape. My goals are to lose the fat that I am carrying. When I mention that I am watching what I eat and working out everyday I get comments back like "Oh whatever" and "and you need to why?". When I tell them that I may look small, but I still have quite a bit of fat to lose and that I am no where near where I want to be, they roll their eyes at me.

    It wouldn't be so bad but everyone else is talking about how they want to do something about weight loss and some talk about what they are doing, but none of them seem to want to include me because we are all at such different places.

    After walking around for 2 years being uncomfortable with the way my body looks to me, I have learned to hide my problem areas so that hopefully no one else notices them, but apparently I need to wear stuff that does not fit me now so that others can see what I see.

    Just had to get this off my chest, it has been bothering me all week.

    Weight loss is a tough and uneven journey. There will always be people in life who want to bring you down, or hold you back. That's why its life. Try not to let it get to you. My girlfriends grandmother constantly asks me why I diet, and says I don't need to, etc etc.

    But hey if I listened to everything everyone else said, I would of never gotten to where I am today. I was also told by college professors that my business wouldn't be successful if I moved back to NJ. But it was, and it is what I have always wanted.

    You want to lose weight. It does not matter what anyone else thinks. AT ALL. It sad but true, people, society as a whole want to see others fail not succeed. Just keep on doing you, because that is the only reason you are doing it in the first place!
  • YourFriendBecky
    Options
    I can understand that you feel how you feel, but you need to also try and understand how they feel. When you're more obviously overweight, people treat you with less respect and are sometimes openly critical. You don't get compliments on your appearance, you don't get asked out or flirted with, and clothes shopping is, to say the least, not fun and sometimes incredibly depressing. So for you to expect people to sympathize when you probably do already look great at 123 pounds... well, it may be a little much to expect.
  • Michelle_J
    Michelle_J Posts: 362 Member
    Options
    Honey, it isn't about them. It's about you. What makes you feel good. What is going to make you happy. As hard as it might be, bc you have to be w/ these people 5 days out of the week, do your own thing. They might feel a little intimidated or even jealous of you bc you don't have that much to lose.........Do your thing!!!
  • Christie_78
    Christie_78 Posts: 18 Member
    Options
    Everyone, regardless of current weight should have fitness goals! So go for it! Who cares, if you have 5, 10 , 100 pounds to lose! No matter what, it's fun working out with a buddy or encouraging one another. Let them know you are serious about getting in shape and being happy with yourself! If they are still not encouraging to you, that is what we are here for!!! :smile:

    Don't let them derail any fitness goals you have. I have a lot of weight left to lose, but I would never discourage or not include anyone just based upon their goals! They may have a longer journey than you, but hell it's still hard work to lose weight!!!

    Good luck to you!
  • SweetNSassyMimi
    Options
    Hey! Sounds like some of your co-workers are a little jealous! The most important thing is that you feel comfortable and are happy with yourself. If you're not as you said, then you are doing the right thing in taking the initiative in dieting and losing weight. I am happy for you1 It doesn't matter if its 5lbs or 50lbs....it's still about losing the weight! Some people don't like to see others succeed or are unhappy with themselves and they don't like to see others reach their goals and be happy! You keep going and make yourself happy! You can always come on here and we will all be your best cheerleaders! Then when you reach your goal, you can hold your head high! Keep going! :happy: You will be great!!!
  • amysambora
    Options
    Come join us in this thread:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/138334-not-that-heavy-girls-trying-to-lose-weight

    There are tons of us there in the same situation who will support you on your journey! As MicJop said, it's about YOU and what makes YOU feel good. Don't be discouraged :)
  • cardbucfan
    cardbucfan Posts: 10,396 Member
    Options
    My answer to people when they say that is "you haven't seen me naked". It usually shuts them up! I only wanted to lose 23 lbs. (I've lost 18) and people are constantly saying "I didn't realize you HAD 18 lbs. to lose" If these women are significantly heavier than you, look elsewhere for support (like here!) or folks to exercise with who are more similar to you. Ultimately it is about your health and doing what makes you feel better. I've learned just not to talk about it around some folks. good luck!
  • jessicayoung82
    jessicayoung82 Posts: 157 Member
    Options
    I think part of it is that we have all been friends and everyone gets along really well. It is actually because of some off them that I started. Hearing them talk about working out, eating right, and comparing stories was motivation enough for me to really start working at it again...and now I can't even join in and share my success and failures. Oh well. Thanks to MFP I have people I can share with and get and give motivation. Thank you all.
  • colochel
    colochel Posts: 263 Member
    Options
    I liked the comment "you haven't seen me naked", haha! I was thinking of saying something more along the lines of you're watching your figure (instead of losing the weight). That way they understand why you eat and work out the way you do, and at the same time it doesn't make them feel crappy about themselves.

    Just a thought. Good luck to you and hope to see a follow up post!