Women over 40

Life_is_Good · May 2008

60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

* A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

* If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

* Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.

* Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

* Older women are genero us with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

* Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.

* Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

* Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize for all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Life_is_Good · May 2008

60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

* A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

* If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

* Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.

* Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

* Older women are genero us with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

* Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.

* Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

* Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize for all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!