Seriously...HOW???
Replies
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You just do it. If you want it bad enough you make it happen.
This is true for me. And on those days when I don't want it enough, I focus on TRYING to do the right thing each time I have a meal. It's a lot of trial and error. I never had a weight issue growing up, but, long story made very short.....an accident (hit from behind in the car) got me off of exercise for a few yrs. I finally got sick of feeling like crap and puttered around here and there until 2 1/2 yrs ago I started lifting. The weight started to drop almost seamlessly and the better I felt (because I just wasn't really trying to do anything specific), the more I wanted to do the right things with my nutrition. The cold, hard major fact though.....is that nutrition is close to everything. I thought I could exercise ANYTHING off. Lots of justifications and lots of hard work - and it does work - but only to a point. I finally hit my point where I want to be healthy and to do that I need to eat right and exercise. Period. Lots of shortcuts were tried....but nothing works like nutrition and exercise.
It's a different process for everyone. Just don't give up! That feels worse, emotionally, than sticking with healthy eating!0 -
920 here.
After many years of wishing, one day I woke up angry. Angry at myself. When I catch myself slipping, I try to remember how angry I was that day and how much it will suck if I go back to where I was. Today is my 1,000th day-in-a-row on MFP.How do you do this every day?
congrats on the 1000!0 -
Major Congrats!!!!0
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When you are 'ready' you will be able to continue your weight loss journey. Counting calories and working out will become a habit. Good luck!0
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You don't want it bad enough yet. Think about the olympics. They train like maniacs and have one goal, to get the gold medal. Nothing gets in their way by trying to achieve this. Strong mind is what it takes and where many people struggle with.
Yeah, I don't want to win the Olympics. I want to find a way to make this PART of my life but not make it my life if that makes sense. Finding balance is always a problem with me. Wanting to give 100% to my job, my family, and my health but there's not enough time, energy, and focus to give each the attention it deserves.
You've gotten a lot of good advice already as I haven't read through all the responses yet.
Are you a perfectionist?
If so, you are like me. Here's what I've learned about trying to be a perfectionist: is you spend so much time trying to do everything perfect that what you end up doing is everything half-*kitten*. This is what I've experienced in life, not meant to be mean in any way. My riding instructor said something yesterday when I told her my knees were so sore from running that I couldn't do more than walk my horse during my ride. Here's what she said: "Then it's time to stop running and just walk more. Do you want to ride an upper level horse in two years or do you want to run? You need to figure out your priorities." Now my riding instructor is very blunt, and usually right. She's already got my next horse picked out for me because she sees a talent in me that I don't see yet. Her point was that I need to slow down and figure out what I want more. At age 40, I still need to learn how to ride and jump because in two years I'm investing a lot of money in a horse. So I need to be able to ride that horse. My point is I can't give 100% to both riding and running right now, I have to make a difficult choice because I love both. So running is going to take a backseat.
I'm not saying to put your family, work, etc. on hold so you can log and exercise. But you do need to re-prioritize some things. Maybe you start with just logging food and don't worry about exercising for now. Make logging food accurately a part of your daily routine until it is a habit. Do you plan your meals ahead of time? Log the food then. Do you have a smartphone? Download the app and log while you are eating (that's what I do most of the time). If that is too much focus on substituting water for other drinks right now, do that for a month and then start logging food. Or don't worry about losing weight right now, just get in the habit of logging.
The reason that pushed me to get serious was chronic migraines. I just got tired of being laid up on the couch most of the time getting fatter and fatter and decided it was time for a change. The best thing you can do for your family is to get and stay healthy, they deserve that so think of it as a gift to them. However you need to think of it when you get tired of logging and exercising. Or like many have said, take baby steps.
Good luck0 -
The' how' for me was starting one thing at a time. I started with the calorie counting. I'm not exact, but I get as close as I can. And it's a habit I had to make myself do. I still miss finishing my diary every night sometimes, but I'll fill it in next day. I haven't added exercise back in because of all the moving we're doing, but that will be next once I get back in the habit of MFP logging. Changing one thing at a time is slow, but that works for me because it's not EVERYTHING at once. Changing everything at once makes me anxious and I end up getting burned out, fall back on old habits, and then I'm back where I started. So start small, maybe change out one meal a day for something healthier and once you get used to that, change something else. I don't know if it'll work for you, but it's something to try anyways.
What also works for me is bribing myself. For instance, right now, if I fill out all my days for the rest of the month of August, I'll take myself out to a nice steak dinner. It's simple, won't crash my calories for day, and very very tasty! If you don't want to use food, promise yourself a different treat if you fill out MFP for a full month. You have to be willing to be honest with yourself about it, but that works for me.0 -
How do you do this every day?
Does it become the most important thing in your life? Do you put tracking your calories and finding healthy food and making time to exercise above everything else in your life?
I can do it for a week. Sometimes I can do it for a month. But I've never been able to continue for longer than that without putting the weight back on.
I cringe every time I look in the mirror. I say negative things to myself every time I try to put on a pair of jeans and find out they are too tight. I feel guilty when I eat anything I shouldn't. But no matter how bad I feel I can't make myself stay on track with this.
Do I have some kind of hormone problem that makes me incapable of dealing with stress? I don't think so, in fact I think I'm pretty normal. So how the heck do I make myself keep going when I'm having a bad day or I'm on my period or I just don't feel like it?
I'm fairly intelligent. I understand the mechanics of losing weight. Am I just lazy?
HOW????
How can I stay on track for more than a week at a time? How can I fit it into my life so I don't feel like I am taking away from my family?
I can see the responses now telling me "you're not a special snowflake, just do it"
cringing and talking negatively about yourself is probably not going to make you stick with this. it is more likely a contributor to your inability to stick with it. I've been there: "why do you even try? it's not like it's going to make a difference. You are going to be fat forever...." and so on.
it's hard to get rid of those thoughts, and, they haven't completely gone away for me. but it has lessened.
Those have to change to something more positive: "you can do this. it's just entering info on a website. you go to facebook every day, why not this too? this will help you make yourself better. you are finally taking ownership...." and so on.0 -
I logged my 1082nd straght day on MFP this morning.
Logging, mindful eating and exercise has just become part of what I do - like brushing my teeth every day, eating well and staying active is what I do.
I wasn't always like this - I started and stopped, and lost and gained, and restarted and stopped again, and lost and gained again - I finally got tired of it, and the last time I started I decided I wasn't going to go through the stopping and starting again, because it sucks!
Mostly what keeps me on track now is having reasonable goals, a reasonable calorie deficit that fits into my lifestyle and still allows the foods I love, and reasonable exercise - around 60 minutes of quality work a day, 5-6 days a week, always at least one rest day. I've reached goal weight, lost fat and inches and dropped several sizes, and kept it off for over two years now.
My diary is open, and my info is on my profile page - feel free to check it out!0 -
Making something a part of your daily routine does not necessitate that it be the most important part of your life. I make coffee every morning- doesn't mean that I worship the Keurig. (Okay, maybe a little...)
Eating healthy doesn't take anymore time than eating crap. It's just a choice you make. Like anything else, when it becomes routine, it's easy. Especially if you give up the negativity and excuses- it's amazing what a time suck those are.
And the best thing for stress in exercise. If it wasn't for my treadmill, I would spend a portion of every day throwing small objects at my husband's head.
Love this.
I started slow, and the logging is just another thing I do each day, like checking email.
I don't have time to join a gym, so I do what I can to increase my normal daily activities, like parking further away from the building at work, taking walk breaks, take the stairs instead of the elevator, got a standing desk. Do leg lifts while drying my hair. Walk laps around the kitchen island while watching the dinner cook.....it all adds up.0 -
Make it a habit. The more habit it becomes, the less time and effort it takes to track.
This.
And find out the things you enjoy which help you to your goal. They are the easiest to keep doing with less effort. Which exercises are your favourite? Which low calorie snacks seem to always hit the spot?0 -
"you're not a special snowflake, just do it"
^^^ This! you said it! :flowerforyou:
Now, my words...
when you're ready, you'll do it & you'll do it consistently. it's quite obvious you're not really ready. doesn't mean you have to be perfect every day, just means you're signing in every day, making an attempt. logging, the good the bad the ugly. like you said: just do it0 -
I do it because my health and well being is the most important thing in my life.
I do it because I've decided that I'm worth it.
I do it because I'm the only one to blame if I fail.
I do it because no one else is going to do it for me.
Sometimes, I have to wake up and make all of those decisions above again.
You just do it, or you don't... but if you do it, you have to do it every damn day.
THIS, a thousand times.
I'm a single mother and I work full time. So I had a thousand excuses not to do it, but taking an hour out of my day a few times a week and logging my food was a small sacrifice compared to knowing I will be around to see my children grow up.0 -
A few things:
First of all THANK YOU! I am going to enjoy reading your motivation and stories of success over and over and getting ideas and inspiration from them.
Yes I'm negative and grumpy in my OP. I'm not ALWAYS that negative, I am frustrated and angry at myself.
I don't only have 20 pounds to lose. I'm 5'9" 191 pounds. 20 pounds is a starting point 140-150 would be my ultimate goal weight. I've never accomplished losing that much before. I usually lose 10, gain 10-15 back, lose 10 again.
I'm not just starting this. It's a cycle I've been stuck in for the last 6-8 years. Who knows, I've lost track. It's not my first time on MFP, I had an account last year and the year before that. I had lovely supportive friends. I lost weight..I gained it back, REPEAT.
I know none of you can tell me the key for making it work for me. But I appreciate your thoughtful comments and sharing your personal stories.
I know logging and measuring my food doesn't take much time at all. Somehow it gives me anxiety of failure and sometimes I can't overcome the stress it causes me, which leads to me not logging at all.
I know my struggles are mental/emotional. I don't know how to overcome them. Thanks to a few of you who mentioned you spoke to someone professionally about your emotions and saw that it helped. I may consider this as there may be a need.
I'm not looking for a perfect body, I just want one I can be content with. I want to feel comfortable and my weight not to be an issue in any decision I make, (like should I wear my bikini to the water park or will everyone be looking at me because I'm too big to be wearing that).
I just changed my goal from 1 pound a week to 1/2 pound a week as per some of your suggestions. I do agree that something is better than nothing. That gives me 1800 calories a day to work with and I know I can do that without being hungry at all. I didn't think 1 pound a week was too restrictive but I haven't been able to stick with it so maybe taking things slower will work better for me.
Thanks again!
Oh, and exercise. I have been trying for a cpl years to become a runner. Because it's convenient, free, and I think I could enjoy it. At this point I'm still mostly a walker but I can jog for 1/2 mile or more sometimes now when I stick with it for a while :happy:0 -
Since this is relatively new...
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here
just a few tips that might help out in the long run. It made a difference for me and I wanted to share it.
struggles are struggles, whether mental/emotional/physical. Doesn't matter what flavor, but the overall goal is to approach and overcome, or at least find ways to make them manageable, right?
I didn't lose 153lbs, just like you don't have to lose 40 or 50lbs to lose.
I lost 1 lb. I just did it 153 times. Carve out the overwhelming numbers and realize that you only have 1lb to lose right now. Then focus on the next one.0 -
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In the past I viewed "eating healthy" in a very black/white way and felt that one splurge kind of negated all my progress. That is not helpful at all. If you eat ten Oreos and a mug of milk, log it and move on. Have fish & veggies for dinner the next 2 days. It all works out.
[/quote]
Yes, this. One little slip up doesn't derail you forever. And perfection ISN'T possible during this journey, you'll burn out fast trying to hold yourself to those standards.0 -
I lost 1 lb. I just did it 153 times. Carve out the overwhelming numbers and realize that you only have 1lb to lose right now. Then focus on the next one.
This might be the best thing I've read on here and it gave me chills. I try to keep this in mind too, small goals, make it a habit. It doesn't take much out of my life anymore, except that I spend most of my life in workout clothes now because I'm only taking one shower a day..0 -
A few things:
First of all THANK YOU! I am going to enjoy reading your motivation and stories of success over and over and getting ideas and inspiration from them.
Yes I'm negative and grumpy in my OP. I'm not ALWAYS that negative, I am frustrated and angry at myself.
I don't only have 20 pounds to lose. I'm 5'9" 191 pounds. 20 pounds is a starting point 140-150 would be my ultimate goal weight. I've never accomplished losing that much before. I usually lose 10, gain 10-15 back, lose 10 again.
I'm not just starting this. It's a cycle I've been stuck in for the last 6-8 years. Who knows, I've lost track. It's not my first time on MFP, I had an account last year and the year before that. I had lovely supportive friends. I lost weight..I gained it back, REPEAT.
I know none of you can tell me the key for making it work for me. But I appreciate your thoughtful comments and sharing your personal stories.
I know logging and measuring my food doesn't take much time at all. Somehow it gives me anxiety of failure and sometimes I can't overcome the stress it causes me, which leads to me not logging at all.
I know my struggles are mental/emotional. I don't know how to overcome them. Thanks to a few of you who mentioned you spoke to someone professionally about your emotions and saw that it helped. I may consider this as there may be a need.
I'm not looking for a perfect body, I just want one I can be content with. I want to feel comfortable and my weight not to be an issue in any decision I make, (like should I wear my bikini to the water park or will everyone be looking at me because I'm too big to be wearing that).
I just changed my goal from 1 pound a week to 1/2 pound a week as per some of your suggestions. I do agree that something is better than nothing. That gives me 1800 calories a day to work with and I know I can do that without being hungry at all. I didn't think 1 pound a week was too restrictive but I haven't been able to stick with it so maybe taking things slower will work better for me.
Thanks again!
Oh, and exercise. I have been trying for a cpl years to become a runner. Because it's convenient, free, and I think I could enjoy it. At this point I'm still mostly a walker but I can jog for 1/2 mile or more sometimes now when I stick with it for a while :happy:
Hi
The fact you are reaching out and being honest about your struggle is a sign of grwoth and progress. Take comfort in that.
The past is done. The future will be here soon enough. Try and focus on today & today only. Its all we have to work with.
I woulda been dead in 5 years if I hadn't made this commitment. All signs were pointing that way.
Just a few things the MFP tribe and common sense has taught me:
1) This is a thing you DO, not a definition of who you ARE. Just like laundry. Take the emotion out of it wherever possible. I cannot stress this enough.
2) My approach? This is a lifestyle change, not a diet. So there is no finite number of days that I am trying to get to. I will be logging in and logging food for the rest of my life, because:
a) This program works
b) I don't want to die young and I was headed that direction
3) Try to remember - We are the results of the choices we make every day, whether those choices are good or bad. Make as many good choices as you can, and the ship will stay steady. At the end of the day, we are the man in the mirror. We are accountable to ourselves and no one else. We can help you with getting there, but the doing is up to you. Leave rationalizing at the door, and sontinue to be honest with yourself. Its the only path to long term success
Cal tracking is considered a good choice (whether boring or not) because it tells you where you really are (just like your check register tells you your balance) - remember to be honest with yourself all the time. Ultimately, you will achieve that which you are seeking much sooner.
If you will stay committed to this, your MFP tribe will commit to helping. Why? Because that's what we do. And we have ALL been there.
Three months ago? I couldn't move. Saturday? I burned 2100 calories exercising. Because? I wanted to.
You got this.. ...and we got YOUR back
FR headed your way
Fsunami0 -
A few things:
First of all THANK YOU! I am going to enjoy reading your motivation and stories of success over and over and getting ideas and inspiration from them.
Yes I'm negative and grumpy in my OP. I'm not ALWAYS that negative, I am frustrated and angry at myself.
I don't only have 20 pounds to lose. I'm 5'9" 191 pounds. 20 pounds is a starting point 140-150 would be my ultimate goal weight. I've never accomplished losing that much before. I usually lose 10, gain 10-15 back, lose 10 again.
I'm not just starting this. It's a cycle I've been stuck in for the last 6-8 years. Who knows, I've lost track. It's not my first time on MFP, I had an account last year and the year before that. I had lovely supportive friends. I lost weight..I gained it back, REPEAT.
I know none of you can tell me the key for making it work for me. But I appreciate your thoughtful comments and sharing your personal stories.
I know logging and measuring my food doesn't take much time at all. Somehow it gives me anxiety of failure and sometimes I can't overcome the stress it causes me, which leads to me not logging at all.
I know my struggles are mental/emotional. I don't know how to overcome them. Thanks to a few of you who mentioned you spoke to someone professionally about your emotions and saw that it helped. I may consider this as there may be a need.
I'm not looking for a perfect body, I just want one I can be content with. I want to feel comfortable and my weight not to be an issue in any decision I make, (like should I wear my bikini to the water park or will everyone be looking at me because I'm too big to be wearing that).
I just changed my goal from 1 pound a week to 1/2 pound a week as per some of your suggestions. I do agree that something is better than nothing. That gives me 1800 calories a day to work with and I know I can do that without being hungry at all. I didn't think 1 pound a week was too restrictive but I haven't been able to stick with it so maybe taking things slower will work better for me.
Thanks again!
Oh, and exercise. I have been trying for a cpl years to become a runner. Because it's convenient, free, and I think I could enjoy it. At this point I'm still mostly a walker but I can jog for 1/2 mile or more sometimes now when I stick with it for a while :happy:
Here's another story - some things that were important for me in making a successful long term change.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/reflections-on-a-year-of-maintenance-667953
And you are right, a lot of this is about managing your attitude. I cover a lot of issues and examples on that in my blog if you're interested in some more thoughts.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/the-guide-to-a-wonderful-life-6862960 -
You don't want it bad enough yet. Think about the olympics. They train like maniacs and have one goal, to get the gold medal. Nothing gets in their way by trying to achieve this. Strong mind is what it takes and where many people struggle with.
Yeah, I don't want to win the Olympics. I want to find a way to make this PART of my life but not make it my life if that makes sense. Finding balance is always a problem with me. Wanting to give 100% to my job, my family, and my health but there's not enough time, energy, and focus to give each the attention it deserves.
You need to give 100% to yourself, and the rest will fall into place. I work full time, and then some (as a high school teacher), I have two kids (think sports and activities) and a husband, and I belong to a plethora of committees. But what I have found is that in order for me to take care of everyone else, I MUST take care of myself first.
When I don't eat right or exercise, I become exhausted, irritable, impatient, and less-effective both at home and at my job. My own children suffer, my students suffer, and my husband hides.
When I exercise, eat right, get enough sleep, and yes, sometimes leave work on time (even though all those essays are ungraded), I am a better human being. My children comment on how much more relaxed I am, and my students comment on how I seem less stressed and "in a good mood".
I get up at 4:45 in the morning to get in a 3.5 mile walk. I make sure I'm in bed, and ready for sleep by 9:30 at the latest. I personally believe that when you make yourself a priority, you have more to give to other people. My health is important - why should I sacrifice that? What kind of a lesson am I teaching my children if I don't exercise and don't eat right?
Well done! This is the answer. OP, you say you want it to be a "part" of your life and not your whole life. I get that, I work, I have kids, husband, animals, etc. But I also think you need to ask yourself how much of your life is spent hating the way you look, the way you feel? How much of your life is spent making excuses of why you can't do something because you don't have the energy? As your kids get older and want to be even more active, do you want to be able to join in with them, or sit on the sidelines? Your family feeds off how you feel about yourself as well as how much you love them!0 -
You just need to be at the point in your life when you want it enough to commit.
That point is different for everyone.0 -
You can set yourself log-in reminders on the app if you need extra motivation.0
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Honestly,I think it's the people that start indulging in diets and activities that are extreme or too difficult for them that start to feel like 'Am I going to deprive myself from what I like forever?' ..and then,they're induced to give up.You just don't have to do that.Be practical and use good judgemental sense when you make your fitness plans and don't get into such diets or exercise plans that you know would be truly difficult for you to do continuously due to being overriden by emotions such as feeling disgusted by your body. Also, no, your mind shouldn't always be pre occupied with thoughts of losing weight,but it should strike you when it needs to. It doesn't have to be the top priority of your life but you just have to try your best.0
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You make showering a major priority, correct?
Same concept.
You don't have to be perfect; you only need continuous effort, a conscientious desire to improve your health.
You'll have days where you get off track. No biggie. Don't use a few days wandering off the path as an excuse to STAY off the path.0 -
I just don't put too much pressure on my self, and don't make changes too quickly. I make sure to be honest with my food log (even when I fall off the wagon) so that I can see patterns in the graph that educate me about my habits. I log my food from my phone if I am at a restaurant, so that its quick and easy. I work excercise into my daily routine. If I can't make it one day, then I shrug and try again tomorrow. Its all about making a life change over time, and focusing your eyes on the future instead of temporary set backs.0
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I know my struggles are mental/emotional. I don't know how to overcome them. Thanks to a few of you who mentioned you spoke to someone professionally about your emotions and saw that it helped. I may consider this as there may be a need.
I'm not looking for a perfect body, I just want one I can be content with. I want to feel comfortable and my weight not to be an issue in any decision I make, (like should I wear my bikini to the water park or will everyone be looking at me because I'm too big to be wearing that).
so- here's the deal on this bit right here.
It doesn't matter what size you are- even if you HAD a perfect body- with the current head space you are living in- you'd still be unhappy. There is a lot of negative head trash talk going on that you have- and a better body will only go so far. A professional may help- but recocgnize you need to love who you are RIGHT NOW.
And that there is a smaller more fit version of you in there- but she's just as awesome as the YOU right now. Because if you can't love yourself now- you won't love yourself in 30 pounds.
Secondly. Think about the down sides.
So what happens when you miss a day? so what? life doesn't quit. It keeps going.
Think about going off track like getting a flat tire.
When you get a flat- what do you do? you may have a melt down- how bad your day is- then you get on the phone and call AAA- or you get the jack out of the back- and you change your tire.
Having a bad food day- and then just throwing your hands up and quitting is like getting a flat tire- having a melt down then getting out and slashing the other 3 tires- and then just sitting down and pouting.
It's stupid. And it doesn't get you anywhere.
So the worst is you have an off day- so you just get back to it the next day- you didn't die- you didn't back track- you aren't a horrible person- you just do the thing the next day and you keep GOING. Life doesn't quit- so you an either sit down next to your car with 4 flat tires- or you can start walking- or you can change your tire.
But the choice is yours- but just don't get so worked up about it- you're lost in the forest with the trees- just take a step and don't over think it.0 -
Because you can't be bothered, you'd like an easy way to do it but there isn't one.0
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I felt the same way you did. I started this over and over and never got past a few days. I Kept wondering how ppl log everyday..how do they not get bored of it? How do they remember? Then I ate, felt guilty, spent time crying trying on clothes, and complaining how fat I was. I had time to fb, write emails, chat with friends. I have a son and I know that my weight was not helping to take care of him. I felt sluggish.
For the past 30 days I have logged everyday. I just did. I stopped asking how and just did it. It takes me 2 seconds as I sit down to eat to log. Sometimes when I have spare time instead of watching tv or facebook I log in my next meal (considering I know what it will be). Im doing it with my husband so we motivate each other. I have to say that helps too. Find someone that will help you. There is also a notification on the app that reminds me at night if I missed any of my logs that day. I must say I haven't had to use it yet.
Seriously I find it easier to diet eating more or less the same foods. I don't eat out anymore and all my foods are saved so I just check them off. Easy!
It took time to get in here, to write your story, to reply. That time you could have planned your whole days meals and then just stick to it.
Im not a pro only 30 days today! But im proud of them and my 14 lbs down!
You can do it! 0 -
bump to read and add...later0
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If you want it bad enough you make it happen, I get up at 1:30 am to do HIIT and eat breakfast before going to the gym at 4 am every day, not because I want to be up when everyone else is leaving the bar, because it is my lifestyle at this point.0
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I honestly believe when it is our time - that is when it will happen.
I was aware that I needed to lose weight and while I watched several co-workers eat their controlled meals and go for walks at lunch I was not motivated by them at all. I knew my day was coming, though I had no idea when or how I would even know it.
One day I walked into the gym, took the tour, listened to the sales pitch and left - the next day I received an offer to sign-up in my e-mail and I never looked back. Some days were hard, heck . . . some weeks were hell, but I never felt like there was any option other than forward!
Don't be so hard on yourself, it just may not be your time!
As a starting point just try and make small changes that you can live with long term and the rest will come to you. It is really amazing how with each phase it gets easier and one day you will wonder what was all the fuss about 0
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